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Date: November 17, 2022
AmateurPub
I lol,'d
So, the first girl just sounds like she's just not that interested in your friendship. That doesn't make her mean or rude or anything like that. You're coworkers and she (maybe) just already has a full social calendar and isn't interested in intermingling with her coworkers. That's not uncommon: it happens, it just sucks to be in your shoes when it does.
The second friend, is an odder situation. Sometimes feelings can be weird with people who tried dating, even if he was still hung up on his ex. He might be busier but, maybe pursuing 1-on-1 hang-outs with you is still weird for him. I've tried this with people that I've gone on a few dates in the past with too, and it always just kinda fades away until you don't chat anymore, IME.
Real advice though, find a social hobby like a sports club: join a fencing club, or a social hiking club, or table tennis club, learn to sail, pick up some old HS sport again (like volleyball, gymnastics, or basketball). Join a board game group, knitting club, or book club.
Honestly, make friends by doing something interesting with people who have like interests. As an adult, who is nearing the end of standard college age that's how you meet friends and develop a healthy social circle. From this point onward you're only ever going to be less likely to gel with people like coworkers and random people at the bar… It's easy in HS and college when everyone around you is the same age and doing the same thing (school). Now, is the time to find who your group of people as an adult is. Figure out where your community is and you'll find friends.
This was exactly my ex gf. As much as sex was amazing with her I decided to brake up.
Just not with you apparently.
Ask him what? If he wants to get back together again? As I mentioned. Don't. Let him come to you if he still wants to.. Especially if he's the one that broke up with you. I'm sorry but you broke his trust and things won't be the same after.. Regardless.
If it's things he can see, he will see them. But you can't force someone back into something because they said they would.
Now I’ve got ain’t it fun by paramour stuck in my head.
As someone who was kicked out at 18, you can do it! It’s hot, and growing up sucks sometimes. But you’ll be surprised and amazed of what you’re capable of when put to the wire.
Love yourself girl and get out of this situation! You deserve better!
That makes some of your other comments about your following and desperate men paying to be in your presence deeply troubling.
I have had a similar issue with my size. I found the best position for my partners and myself was something similar to what is called prone bone. The jist is that you use your butt as a bit of a buffer. Doing this will keep a solid inch + of his penis outside of you while giving him the feeling that he is fully inside you. You may also find other positions work well to. Experiment with angles as well and you may find other options for you. Just remember that if it doesn't feel good for both of you then you need to try something different.
!remindme 7 days
Good for you. You deserve so much better than what she’s giving. She’s shown that she doesn’t truly value what you’ve had, so it’s time to put yourself first. You’ve got this!
Well they where asking me how naughty I was with certain tone and asked if I had a girlfriend so maybe they like me idk Atleast one of them, who told me her name and asked if I had a girlfriend
Take a picture of the glasses to tuck away. Wait until tomorrow before saying anything just in case. Then mention the charge on the account and ask if he knows about it or if you need to call the bank for a fraudulent charge
A selfish, life ruining and destructive choice. Just because your sexuality isn't a choice let's not pretend she's a good person, her decisions at every point has lead her down this path. She could have stopped at any time.
I obviously don't know your girl and its ridiculous to offer a diagnosis over the internet but…
She sounds exactly like me until I was diagnosed with ADHD and narcolepsy. It's pretty common for both to go together and, in my case, medication has really helped.
That's not what demisexual means.
Demi means you require an emotional connection before engaging in sex. My girlfriend is Demi and we have fabulous sex.
A month in, he showed you who he is. But, you keep hanging on, and hanging on, and hanging on. Why is that? If you don't like someone's behavior and you want it to stop, you need to stop accepting it. Nothing you've said would make me think he'll change or stop doing what's making you so upset.
Boyfriend – lies about being exclusive one month in.
Argument ensues – blinders go up.
Crap you don't like – argument ensues – blinders on – thinking he'll stop this time…
Rinse and repeat. I'd put money on him doing more than simply liking and putting fire emojis on Instagram posts.
Why are you in a relationship wherein you don't trust your partner? Messaging other women and attempting to hook up with someone else whilst in a month long supposedly exclusive relationship defeats the purpose of exclusivity, does it not?
She thought I'd find out about it while looking through our home server, where I back up all our phone's photos and videos automatically. She had no idea if that video had been uploaded or not and decided to get ahead of it.
I scheduled a Dr appt for next week. My regular Dr isn't in until after the New year.
Have you had a paternity test for the children?
You know it isn't a problem with the guys right? If a guy hits on her, she should shut it down immediately. If she doesn't you have a gf problem. If she gets random platonic messages from friends, it's a you problem.
Yes there is a copper IUD that is non hormonal. I had it or a few years.
I think it's because I only seem to be thinking about the good stuff at the moment, like the stuff I'm missing, but you are right, it wasn't healthy for me.
Thank you I will meet up with her again hopefully she agrees
Sweetheart, I'm so sorry ?. You'll both be okay, but it sounds like you've reached a moment where couple's counseling is necessary. Its healthy and there's nothing to be ashamed of in going to therapy. Sometimes we just don't have the right set of tools for the occasion. But sometimes it's literally because it's too hot for us to see passed our own prejudice and bias–on both sides. The therapist can help guide both of you and assist you in navigating this issue. A therapist is also a neutral party without conflict of interest or an annoying “self-preservation” mechanism getting in the way.
OP has real narcissistic vibes in her text. You don't see things as they are or you are purposefully hiding some info.
Good fucking man for recognizing what they are doing to you.
Yeah bro, it's fine she has emotions about that guy getting married. Even if she doesn't care for him romantically anymore, it's a huge ego hit to see someone you wanted to marry marry someone else later one.
It is absolutely not normal for people romantically involved to need weeks from their SO to manage their feelings. The normal behavior is to need to spend time with you because they are in pain. Not away from you to feel better.
I would absolutely recommend you tell all of us on here to fuck off, and discuss how you're feeling with her. Whatever you decide, it's better than having all these mental cases who can't keep a relationship together themselves try and force feed you their dating advice.
Ditto
Get legal advice, get it looked at by a professional and get your own created. If you both actually love each other then this will be easy to sort out. If this is difficult then probably a good idea to not marry.
Update us when you find out..mean time get a lawyer and move finances.
Force the paternity test and please get checked for stds.
Sounds like a good reason to no longer have a relationship with her. Probably dodging a bullet long term tbh.
Yeah, I can understand that.
I linked section 4
So you have health concerns (chest pain, getting winded etc) and you are still doing ALL of the chores and cooking, and by the sounds of it waiting on her hands and foot?
She sounds awful. Like a spoilt selfish demanding child. Why are you letting her treat you like this? What does she ever do for you?
So you know that your Gf's libido is down do to depression… You need to quit blaming it on the irrational thought that she is banging everyone else. That is not a healthy way to treat/view your partner. It also detracts from her actual problem of depression.
Ask your therapist how to knock it off….
He's not trying now so that's a given
He never grew up. Do you want to be his new mommy and hope you'll have better luck than his parents?
I hear what your trying to say and agree with you.
We all have differing boundaries, it was also his boundary for me. There is no dictating.
So your only “gift” to him was unilaterally deciding what your joint activity was going to be and making that a surprise?
He could have probably done that if this was on the table. But he thought you were going to decide on that together.
So not only did you go against your agreement to chose the activity solo but you didn't actually get him a gift.
You’re being stupid by not seeing that he is using you or you’re his side-chick or both. Doing things against your will? And you keep going back? You owe it to yourself to treat yourself a lot better than you’re doing now. Dump him and find someone who treats you right.
Fantasy characters are different than watching real people have sex. Fantasy characters are different than watching thousands of women hot.
Fantasy characters are different than watching real people have sex. Fantasy characters are different than watching thousands of women hot.
Yeah, moving to a new area and making new friends is hot and I’m sure daycare costs are prohibitive.
Are there any underlying anxiety or depression issues with either of you that are compounded by your circumstances? The controller breaking thing sounds like something you both could explore with a counselor.
If I’m understanding your post you are the breadwinner and probably tired and stressed after a long day.
A viewpoint might be that she’s craving adult interaction (from you) after being at home with baby.
Both of you need time for your own interests, experiences, and friends.
Have you tried meetup.com or similar sites for activities outside of the house?
If finances allow are there options for night classes in your area? (I.e. Dance, crafts, cooking)This could give both of you time away from home and a social outlet.
You could do something simple like write brief notes for her to find during the day. Vary the message, bring up pleasant shared memories, positive, affirming thoughts about her, etc., or bring home a small bouquet of flowers occasionally. Basically create actions that demonstrate that she occupies thought space in your mind that are warm and reassuring.
Best wishes, feel free to ask questions.
How's he spending it with someone else if he is there resting?
??
You’re right kick em out
Seems like you're putting all the blame on him
If there’s a post that’s already addressed something like this could you link it? I haven’t been able to find anything that fees applicable bc the others I’ve seen have specific triggers, but I really don’t know what changed with me
Why would you want to be friends with someone who cheated on their spouse? Friends are a reflection of you. By keeping her in your life, your complicit in her actions. It sounds like your already a sympathizer, and THAT is a red flag to me personally that you are open to cheating yourself if the reason is justified.
Hmm.. interesting thought. Why so?
If your wife wants you to not be friends with a cheater, you back your wife. You can have a discussion about trust and all of that, but if your wife is feeling insecure, then your first duty as a husband is to her.
If you don't do this, you're going to cause her to have even more trust issues.
Also, your friend is a dirty cheater. Even if her husband was a bad person, she should have followed through with a divorce or a separation, making it clear they were done before cheating.
Two wrongs don't make a right.
Anyway, back to your wife. You dedicated yourself to her.
She doesn't want to be friends with someone or have someone in your lives that is has proven to be willing to sleep with married men.
I don't blame her. I wouldn't want my wife to have a friend that was a cheater, and vice versa. Just like I wouldn't want my wife to be friends with an ex, and vice versa.
Back your wife's decision. Then, talk to her about trust. But only do that after you have reaffirmed her trust in you.
Get a paternity test you remind me of dale from king of the hill. Also set boundaries
The way I would have told Maya already, you people come on here and talk about what your shit friends are doing and the obvious thing to do in this situation is to tell Maya and you havent yet??
What are you waiting for? You should have told her by now and screw that homewrecker and cheater and it's gross how they're trying to make Vivian the godmother, tell her, stop waiting around
It sounds like she changed when your son was born? Is it possible she had PPD?
I’m sorry you’re going through this. It sounds awful.
But I can’t help thinking that this is such a recent change. Something happened to make her so angry. And it’s not just you – her family is noticing it too.
Whatever's going on with her, she needs therapy. Especially if you don’t trust your son with her. I hope she’s willing to get help for all of your sakes.
Info: is the “last couple of years” since having your son?
Yeah you pretty much only have the two options. The great thing is, if you do decide to break up you’ll meet someone else you like even more than her that has a monogamous relationship style. Don’t hurt yourself to try to make someone else happy, that’s not love.
Fair. That's not what I meant. I meant, the truth in and of itself is not always morally superior and you are not obliged to hurt people, including yourself, in some uncertrain and vague ethical pursuit. It is a valid choice to say “this is mroe than I can deal with, it's not for me to solve”.
And it's very difficult for you to assess what is actually best for your father in this situation.
And I say this as a father myself.
Make your decisions carefully, is all I'm saying.
To give an example of how much delicate and fucked up stuff can be lurking under the surface that you might not even know about… in my family, in turned out that one of my cousin was related to my aunt but not her husband. You know why? He was actually the child of my other, heavily disabled aunt, and my grandfather (her own father!) who sexually abused her as she couldn't resist or diclose it, and was given to my newlywed aunt and her husband to raise.
I'm not saying these things are more likely than just plain cheating, I'm just saying… that if you decide to let the cat out of the bag, there's no putting it back in, and you can't always predict the damage you will cause and the actual skeletons you'll be bringing out of the closet.