Your post was removed for the following reason(s):
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Posts must:
include details about the involved parties including ages, genders, and length of relationship, and
request advice in real situations involving two or more people
We are enforcing the two rules listed above by making all titles start with ages/genders in the following format:
[##X][##X], [## X][## X], or [##-X][##-X] where ## is the age and X is the gender (currently M, F, T, A, NB, FTM, MTF but more can be added). You can have more than two ages/genders listed, but you must have at least two at the beginning of your title. Here is an example:
Oh my god! Yes, you are so right. I am so sorry you had to deal with similar things, and so happy that you seem to have found yourself and your ground. You seem like a badass.
To be honest, I did not even look for a relationship (I broke up with my ex about 7 months ago) when I started dating this guy. I simply fell for him too fast (which was maybe a consequence of a lot of unprocessed emotions from previous bs). I should probably cut my losses and focus on myself.
I still feel tempted to see him though. That is the struggle. He lives in a different city (about two hours with train from me), and I go there a lot for work. I am weak, and know I will likely be texting him and ask if I can stay the night whenever I'm there. I mean, should I on-line in a hotel when I can have my heart broken for free in his 80 cm bed, IN THIS ECONOMY?
If he feels “disrespected and beliytled” over someone merely disagreeing with him, even when it's something as ludicrous as “should you leave a massive shit to clog the toilet, rendering it unusable and stink up the house while it's just sitting thete, spreading feces particles through the air of the kitchen area”, he's got some serious issues and needs to work with a professional.
He desires to hold a level of command, power and the unquestioning obedience of family members that's really not normal in healthy relationships. You're right that it sounds like a control and dominance issue. (With a bit of scat fetish exhibitionism thrown in there as well)
You might feel like that now, but even fully grown adults find themselves in manipulative and emotionally abusive relationships. Or relationships in which there is a huge power imbalance and they feel overwhelmed. Very often abusers use tactics like love booming and seem wonderful in the first year(s). Then they sink their claws in as you fall in love.
So what we are saying is BE CAREFUL. You could be walking into a predators trap.
You need to ask yourself why someone his age would want a relationship that has such a big power imbalance at the outset due to your age gap and experience levels. Does he want that power imbalance? If so, why? How is he going to use that to manipulate you as time goes on?
We are worried for you, because we have seen this story play out a million times. Many of us have been there ourselves.
Hello /u/Ill_Treat6557,
Your post was removed for the following reason(s):
Your title did not include at least two ages/genders or was not formatted correctly
Posts must:
include details about the involved parties including ages, genders, and length of relationship, and
request advice in real situations involving two or more people
We are enforcing the two rules listed above by making all titles start with ages/genders in the following format:
[##X][##X], [## X][## X], or [##-X][##-X] where ## is the age and X is the gender (currently M, F, T, A, NB, FTM, MTF but more can be added). You can have more than two ages/genders listed, but you must have at least two at the beginning of your title. Here is an example:
[34NB][88-F] We are two people in an example post
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Oh my god! Yes, you are so right. I am so sorry you had to deal with similar things, and so happy that you seem to have found yourself and your ground. You seem like a badass.
To be honest, I did not even look for a relationship (I broke up with my ex about 7 months ago) when I started dating this guy. I simply fell for him too fast (which was maybe a consequence of a lot of unprocessed emotions from previous bs). I should probably cut my losses and focus on myself.
I still feel tempted to see him though. That is the struggle. He lives in a different city (about two hours with train from me), and I go there a lot for work. I am weak, and know I will likely be texting him and ask if I can stay the night whenever I'm there. I mean, should I on-line in a hotel when I can have my heart broken for free in his 80 cm bed, IN THIS ECONOMY?
Suggest wife change jobs to one with a better work environment.
Suggest wife start therapy for her issues
If he feels “disrespected and beliytled” over someone merely disagreeing with him, even when it's something as ludicrous as “should you leave a massive shit to clog the toilet, rendering it unusable and stink up the house while it's just sitting thete, spreading feces particles through the air of the kitchen area”, he's got some serious issues and needs to work with a professional.
He desires to hold a level of command, power and the unquestioning obedience of family members that's really not normal in healthy relationships. You're right that it sounds like a control and dominance issue. (With a bit of scat fetish exhibitionism thrown in there as well)
You might feel like that now, but even fully grown adults find themselves in manipulative and emotionally abusive relationships. Or relationships in which there is a huge power imbalance and they feel overwhelmed. Very often abusers use tactics like love booming and seem wonderful in the first year(s). Then they sink their claws in as you fall in love.
So what we are saying is BE CAREFUL. You could be walking into a predators trap.
You need to ask yourself why someone his age would want a relationship that has such a big power imbalance at the outset due to your age gap and experience levels. Does he want that power imbalance? If so, why? How is he going to use that to manipulate you as time goes on?
We are worried for you, because we have seen this story play out a million times. Many of us have been there ourselves.
Oh no, not school aged insults! How will she ever go on with her life.
You're 18. Just finish, and then work on her while you get ready for round 2.
With respect, she did ask for help, she literally asked OP to perform a medical procedure and avoid the actual doctors.
That is two helps she's asked for, albeit in the same incident.