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Lanie, y.o.
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Date: September 26, 2022
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This is a her problem. You’ve done nothing wrong. She has to learn to not attribute things to you that were faults of another person.
If he doesn't want his mother to be an issue in your relationship like it was in previous ones, he needs to deal with his mother issue. You can't just be expected to magically be okay with it.
You are clearly eloquent and know what you need to tell him so I'm not sure how much help we can be. You shouldn't move in until you can be certain that the privacy and boundaries of your home will be respected by both him and his mother, so you'll need to have long talks before taking that step.
I hope you have a good time on the date.
You go to your family in a different state and you block him on everything you might have to leave Canada but I would rather see you leave Canada then see her come to you and harm will come to you if you don't leave
Tl;dr: My husband threw my lack of biological relationship to our daughter in my face while we were arguing. I’m beyond hurt and need advice on how to proceed. How do I get him to see my side?
Either he takes total parental responsibility for her or he doesn't. That means if he wants to pay the biological parent card that he dors ask the cooking for her, cleaning, washing clothes, taking and collecting her to school and activities etc.
The simple answer to this is what plans came first? If you planned the visit before the sleepover then it's what matters.
You could compromise and move your parents visit out a weekend which would have been my choice before this all has happened.
But now he's made the choice about whether you have any parental responsibility to this child or not. He has to decide that you're equal and the simple answer applies, or you aren't a parent to her any more.