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i am Kati – murmur., 31 y.o.
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On-line Live Sex Chat rooms i am Kati – murmur.
Date: September 28, 2022
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There is one thing I'm missing in the information. Were you exclusive in the beginning of the relationship? Plenty of people don't assume you are exclusive until you've actually had a conversation about it. And this is also vital to whether she actually cheated or not.
Another thing that you have to consider if she cheated is if she have done it more times. Has she displayed any of the red flags of cheating? Hiding her phone, working late, being cold, having unusually little sex with you etc.
If you don't trust her you can go down the rabbit hole and check her current phone for evidence.
As for seeing who she was when you started dating you need to evaluate that on yourself and compare it with who she has become. Having insecurities in the beginning of a relationship is normal.
If you want to save the relationship have a serious conversation with her. Be honest about finding her old phone and the original reason you started it. Say how what you found made you feel and go from there.
I gagged upon reading this. GOOD HYGIENE IS NON-NEGOTIABLE!! If any grown man has to be “bribed” into doing basic tasks like washing themselves, wiping their ass, etc. then that is not a grown man at all — that’s a child. You tell your husband you did not marry a child and you refuse to mother him about taking care of himself. Not being clean before sex will lead to UTIs, yeast infections, and a bunch of other unsavory health issues for your body. How dare he try to compromise that due to laziness. This should be a standard that you do not budge on and if he refuses to comply then girl, you need to think long and hot if you want to stay with someone who thinks it’s acceptable to wallow in their own filth after a long work day for the rest of your life. Ew.
My wife is autistic so I get that this can be hot to navigate. I'm not sure if this would help you in the same way it would help her. Here is what I would ask:
“Hey so I know you spend time with your Ex, if your comfortable with sharing, why did the relationship end?”
Depending on how long you've been dating, you may have either just want to observe the relationship a bit more with your newfound knowledge on his previous relationship, or tell him that “you are fine with him being friends with her, but you wouldn't feel comfortable with him being alone with her”.
Updateme!
OP why are u with this dude? He clearly is breaking boundaries of things that u aren't comfortable with AND HAVE STATED AS SUCH! due to literal SA trauma and ontop of it found it funny? And then ignored u for not liking it?
ur staying because?
“He's a good guy?” :No he isnt! I married a good guy, i have family members and friends who are good guys… ur bf did something to u you hate and makes u feel gross about urself for his own pleasure and found your discomfort humorous! Good men don't do that!
Because “you love him?” : my gurl wtf is there to love?! He sounds like a creep. And don't say uve been together for a long time. That doesn't excuse his behavior it makes it worse.
Because “he will say sorry and it was a mistake”: he wasn't sorry! And he made that rather clear if he apologizes it'll be to get u off his back not because he gives a shit about the fact it hurt u. Bt to get u to stop nagging him if u get the self respect to tell him it's unacceptable.
U shouldn't feel Slightly violated.. he violated u! U don't do tht shit to someone u love especially someone that's been physically and mentally impacted by trauma because of the same shit!
U deserve better please Lord have the decency towards urself to get a better bf!
Hi OP. I don't think you should be as criticized since it's obvious that your heart is in the right place and you're just honestly trying to help, and seeking advice.
This isn't the comment on whether it's right or wrong for him to double down on his pride, or offer advice to either of you, but for perspective – this is a common foundational story/situation for very successful, Champion-level athletes across probably all martial arts. Whether MMA, Boxing in Mexico, Muay Thai in Thailand, Lethwei in Myanmar, etc. some of the most successful athletes are rags to riches stories. Not saying this is exactly that but being prove, experience lack, poverty can be incredibly motivation, through his training, transitioning going pro, winning fights.
He may subconsciously or consciously know he can relax a bit with say an extra $500 that can alleviate financial pressure, which could make the difference between an win or loss. MMA commonly pays double for a win.
Not sure this helps, but could make a little more sense of things in this current phase.
This is very well expressed. I’ve always been “alternative” and whatever stage of my life I’m in hasn’t changed that. Obviously that sounds completely insufferable, but I don’t know how to express that concept without sounding like a pretentious asshole. Sincere apologies.
Other than “sometimes she wants to cook” what exactly does she accomplish around the home other than breastfeeding? You have every right to resent the situation. You're going out and working then coming home and working, even working before work in the mornings while she has a nanny and all day to do nothing.
But in the meantime put the baby first. His needs need to be met
Big difference between a 36 yr old and a 18-20 year old. A fully developed brain for one
I have talked to her about all of this before as I said above. And when I say open relationship I am fully open to her possibly reaching out and having sex with others as well. I'm not meaning for just me. For all I know it's me that's making her not want to have sex. As long as we both use protection it shouldn't change how we feel about each other at this point. All I'm saying is we have tried to talk, she has tried to change, and it's not working. We hardly touch each other at all and as a person physical touch is what I like.
Talk to a professional about this. This is a bit over reddit's paygrade.
Lolll I mean asking “how are you doing today?” Might be a dumb question after reading it… causevof course he's not doing good today his dad just died 4 days ago.
P.s I have past anxiety with being nervous I am annoying him or making him mad idk just will all the fights we had the past 6 months so it's like I just get nervous.
Don’t worry about looking at his phone that’s the least of your problems right at the moment I would tell him you saw his phone. And you can tell him that you won’t stay in a situation like that if that’s how you feel. And that he hast to make a decision and if you ever find something like this out again that you will be gone. That’s if you feel that way way
He’s trying to cheat. So if that’s a dealbreaker for you, you got a problem.
If you have copies of the messages where he's specifically blackmailing you, send them to him and tell him the next time he contacts you, all of this is going to the police and you'll be pressing charges
Do your other friends treat you like crap like he did on your birthday?
If he can't meet up to their standards, he's not a friend.