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Evellyn , ♥, 18 y.o.
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On-line Live Sex Chat rooms Evellyn , ♥
Date: October 19, 2022
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Not being mean, being realistic.
I did suggest plans to do stuff for that week that would just be local and to go to a New Year’s party with her friends and family (which we did line up). It was scheduled
He needs reassurance that you aren't going to use that baby to break his heart. So e women are evil and many men got stuck in a web because they had children with the wrong person and he is scared
How comes you didn't discuss this BEFORE moving in together?
Not sure what is being asked here. The dog was discussed in depth before moving in. I thought we were on the same page about the dog being OURS after I moved in but he's thrown it in my face twice now that the dog is honestly mine because “If we were to break up, who would keep him?” and I don't really know what to say to that.
She was looking for a reason to leave you if she’s using Facebook ads. Hell my feed is FULL of almost very hot underwear ads right now. In the 20 years since I was old enough to buy this stuff I’ve probably bought it 10 times. Sorry dude if you have to rationalize the Facebook ad algorithms to your girl, you’re in for a lifetime of bullshit. Next she’s going to get mad at you drove by hooters on the way to work and one time you had sex with someone 5 years before you met her.
I know my worth and my limits but I also know her own worth.
She doesn't seem to see your worth though. If she truly did, she would not be considering this other man. Even if she's in a state of flux in her own life.
It’s probably not my place to report it to their HR even though it’s what I wanted to do earlier. I don’t want to ruin someone else’s marriage and career over this. She will have to answer for her actions to whatever higher power she believes in. That’s not my place to be the jury, judge and executioner.
Omg. Glad you posted the last edit. I'm really glad everyone helped you see how bad your bf is. Thank you for taking the advice given about leaving him. We might just be a bunch of strangers to you, but we care about people who fall victim to abusive partners.
I understand why people would be upset that their spouse did not involve them in the discussion. But I am just flabbergasted at how extreme their reactions are.
I'm going to play devil's advocate here.. While this does seem suspicious (I understand your concern totally because I'd be pissed too!) he could have lied about the whole thing and told you he fell asleep on a mates sofa, which let's face it would have been easier than having to answer a bunch of question instead of telling you this story… Which makes me wonder if he's actually telling the truth?
He has secret social media accounts and a credit card that I don’t have access to for this
C'mon OP… this is bigger that just cheating there.
I can't say yes immediately to someone I don't know though without fully getting to know him first…If after knowing him I didn't like him, and I had already said yes to him, I would be leading HIM on.
i hope you dont take this the wrong way, but i would recommend doing some reading on both attachment theory and narcissism. i think you may learn a bit about your own tendencies. id also consider seeking out a therapist to discuss this with, because you described behaviors that are typical symptoms of some more deeply rooted issues.
Using it as an emotional hold on you. She will retract in and say the opposite again soon to fuck with your head
I agree with this completely. OP seems to have a pretty clear head on their shoulders about the situation they are in. The wife is abusive.
About the food, definitely no abuse. I agree with others here that you need to get at least 50 $ worth of shelf stable groceries from one source or another. Yes it’s embarrassing for you, but hopefully it’s a one time thing until you get the refund.
Absolutely not, so many men get put through the ringer. So many. Tell him and let him make his mind up, that's his damn right. One of the only rights we men have left….
Ask him (not while your at it) what he wants to hear.
My ex husband liked being called a good little boy which killed the bedroom and our relationship.
Nope, my area has basically no need by car. Public transport goes everywhere and theres bikelanes everywhere. My job is 3 minutes walking and has been since forever.
(I'm from the netherlands)
I want to leave now honestly. He keeps saying he doesn't want me to leave. And he has tears in his eyes when I say I want to leave. Idk why I'm so weak
So, you’re 19, have an adopted teenage kid, 21 yo stay at home wife. You’re the only source of income, struggling to make ends meet. With this info I’m assuming you rent and not own your home? So the cats damaging the carpet and smell could be a bigger issue down the line. Sorry man, you guys are just not financially ready to have all these pets yet.
When you’re partnered as an adult, following all of your childhood traditions isn’t always possible. If you’re lucky and both partner’s parents are still married, you still have two competing families for the same time. Many of us have 4 or more families to align with. And often with great distances.
You sound very unwilling to compromise. You want what you want. And you want to be back home overnight and for the morning+.
He wants to see his family too and doesn’t want to be in someone else’s home overnight and up at the crack of dawn spending many hours.
You need to find a compromise.
Sure you’re not married but you’re a couple. You don’t have to be married to be committed and if you’re committed then both of your needs and wants should be honored where possible with compromises if needed.
If all of you live in the same town, then perhaps you spend the night at home with him, do your early morning Xmas with him, then you both go to your parents’ driving separately so he can leave after a few hours. Then meet up again qt his parents’ place?
Just talk about it. Not in a passive aggressive way. Just in a way that is questioning because you sincerely want to know.
Start the conversation like this “You know how it makes you uncomfortable when other women check me out? I don't know if you realized this, but you often do it too. Why do you think that is? Lets talks about it”
Develop the way it makes you feel over the course of the conversation. Opening the conversation with the way she has expressed it makes her feel makes it relatable and an icebreaker
She was responding to the signals you were sending
Why weren’t you at the party… Could the reason you weren’t the becthe reason she didn’t call you and drag you out of bed to come get her… I’m talking about you weren’t there because you had to get up early… Sounds like maybe her parents did a good job raising their daughter. Respectful enough to not bother you and responsible enough to not drive.
This could’ve been a “my gf died driving home drunk” post
I think you should tell her how happy you are that she was responsible enough to not drive drunk. I bet the guys were good guys and didn’t let her drive. There are actually good friends out there. Be trusting but mindful
They've been broken up a minute and you have been together 28 seconds. You are rebound. Dump her and let her sort it out.
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I am 36. I would rather bathe in a vomit-diarrhea mixture than date a 20 year old. There's a reason this grown man is with you instead of someone his own age, and I think you really need to think on this before giving him any more of your time and attention.
This is what happens when you basically date a child.
Find a girlfriend closer to your age ?♂️
Even if she mostly initiates the convos now ? I am interested tho
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Honestly, just break up with her. This is absolutely unhinged behavior and she needs to know how toxic and unacceptable it is.
Before insulin prices were finally lowered in the US (on SOME insurances), I actually traveled to Canada to buy my insulin. It was still hella expensive, but it saved me a few hundred dollars compared to the price I would have paid in the US, with insurance.
His reaction is wrong and should be more compassionate and level headed. Having said that, I have no idea why you got that procedure and still want to use condoms with your husband.
She didn't view you as the same as the people that pays her. She probably felt extremely comfortable with you and you showed her a side of you that she didn't know existed. You were the asshole. You could have been much nicer to your supposedly best friend jeez man. You are an asshole.
Divorce is not a threat in my house. If you say it, you’re gonna get it. I’m not playing that game, and I’d never do that to my husband either (unless I really meant that I wanted one).
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That’s just fucking gross and weird and not ok in the slightest!
So abuse, in your head, doesn't exist unless there's physical abuse? Thanks, oh great braindead gatekeeper of true abuser.
If he's sorry for going off the rails and just got lost in his head and in his vices and understands what he did was fucked maybe consider staying?
Obviously he isn't.
never have a child with this man for the sake of the child please
Postpone the wedding, first get a career under your belt.
Please show him this post.
Based on how you described it I'd probably dismiss it if you were sober. It reads like an accident but you would know better than I.
There are two questions .
1 Are you prepared to walk away from him ?
and if there’s not a circumstance where you will
Do you realise you are allowing him to treat you poorly ?
Its NOT your fault that he does what he does but you are trying to change him and he won’t and justify staying and putting up with it coz you “ love him”
there is no point drawing a line in the sand and if the person steps over it drawing another line
You are not happy .
it’s time to stop drawing new lines
How does she know that? I recommend immediate couples counseling so that you can learn to communicate with each other a hell of a lot better.
I used to think so too until I started working with small children. Kids in daycare are actually taught these things by their teachers, and I've seen parents of children as old as 6 go into the bathroom with them to make sure they wipe properly.
I would say that this is very common among parents. When I worked as a nanny, the parents were actively teaching the kids to change their underwear and socks daily as soon as they were old enough to wear underwear. There was monitoring of washing hands after the toilet, making sure all the shampoo got rinsed from hair, and brushing teeth twice a day. In cases where I didn't see the parents do this because it was in a daycare environment, the daycare workers filled the same role.
This man wouldn’t lift a finger to protect a teen in an industry rife with abuse. Ask yourself: is this man a good parent? Is he a good man? The answer to both is no. You just didn’t realise it until now. He is buying leisure time at the expense of your mental and physical health bc he thinks looking after his kids (for the first time in his life) is completely your job because you have tits. Run before you have your own kids who girls up without a father
No word of a lie I was going to download Grindr today because I have always been bi-curious lol but I don't know if it's a good idea for me to try something so different so soon.
there absolutely are but statistically is 97% expect sex or sexual acts. amd the not my opinion those are real statistics for sugar daddies
When someone tells you they are a 'psychopath and doesn't care if he murders someone or goes to jail' BELIEVE THEM!!!!
This should leave you 'unsettled' because he just told you he would kill you and your family with no hesitation at all.
He sounds like a loser. What are the redeeming qualities he has that makes you want to be with him?
Yes, tell your brother especially as he apparently understands what sexual assault is and does not downplay it.
Especially if it's something he doesn't want because he's perfectly fine without being married. I wouldn't wanna pay for a party where everything is for her and that dress gets worn once and the risk of her being a bridezilla. Her family hates him based on looks and the fact that he's not paying a cent is an affront to their sensibilities. He needs to find something better.
Dude your boyfriend is weird as hell for saying that lmfao
I have no idea how cases and claims like this work, but could get a lawyer involved pretty easily.
Do that. IAAL and we aren't allowed (for dozens of good reasons) to give legal advice anonymously over the internet, so nothing you get from this thread is going to be all that useful. You almost certainly have options here but only an attorney will be able to tell you what they actually are.
When you initiate sex is he turning you down?
You’re the one being childish here. Not surprising given you dated a 22 year old at 30 and considered her a best friend. That shows significant immaturity on your end. And even with her being so important to you, you treated her like she was expendable.
It sounds to me like the way you ended things with Kelsey and started dating Lauren was messy. You may have been technically single, but it’s clear that Kelsey didn’t see things the same way. This messy on again off again relationship style is a recipe for hurt feelings, and it’s something you should strive to avoid in your next relationship.
You were smart to go no contact with Kelsey when she was badmouthing Lauren. You may have deserved her anger, but you shouldn’t keep people in your life who are harming your relationship or are rude to your partner. This was pretty much the only good decision you made here, and it barely counts because it doesn’t seem like you were actually no contact at all.
You don’t text “happy birthday” to your ex who is being rude to your current partner. You maybe could have been okay updating her on the dog, although you should absolutely have looped Kelsey in on that, and probably shouldn’t have done it at all. Texting Kelsey about your relationship with Lauren is such a betrayal and so incredibly stupid on your part. I’d have dumped you on the spot, tbh. Seriously, why would you ask someone who doesn’t respect your relationship for advice about your relationship? All else aside, you really think Kelsey is going to give good, unbiased advice? Not to mention the secrecy about it, and the whole idea of confiding in someone who is an enemy of your relationship.
Now you refuse to block her, which is probably the nail in the coffin for Lauren. You’re so focused on the respect Kelsey “deserves” that you’re eagerly disrespecting Lauren in the process. I really don’t understand how you can actually think you’ve done nothing wrong here.
Prepare to be single, and maybe spend a good chunk being single and working on yourself before you start dating again.
Tell him to use for penis enlargement, as you have no interest.
Drive more often.
Going into a relationship expecting someone will change is always going to end it disappointment. I’ve been on both sides of that, I understand seeing the potential in someone rather than who they are, but you can’t change someone who doesn’t want to change.
He clarified in other comments what I said was the case. Basically he’s been snooping into the internet traffic through his router. Therefore, even if you go incognito, he can still see what his wife is watching. Which is really creepy.
Ty
Agree on this one. What stripper is down for the person they’re dancing on getting completely very hot and grinding on them??
It doesn't matter if you love her if she doesn't really love you, does it?
People think you’re trolling because you’re not actually offering any thought into the advice given and all your comments come across as intentionally ignorant and naive. ppl say to set boundaries, you respond by saying that’s too harsh, you don’t want her to resent you. Ppl say she needs therapy, you say there’s no way to do that ( which is a lie). Ppl say stop paying for her expenses, you say you can’t do that bc that’s too harsh and will hurt her. you keep commenting but you don’t ever mention what your gf DOES contribute to the relationship. you keep saying she doesn’t need therapy, but can’t see that she hasn’t been able to help herself and you haven’t been able to help herself in years. So why do you think you could motivate her now? And you keep getting into these little back and forths in the comments section for no reason which really tells me you’re trolling for entertainment.
If this is a real post, then you and her both need therapy. It is possible you are real bc I’ve met ppl like you and you really need to seek help. But if you are trolling (which I am pretty sure you are), well then thanks for the entertaining read lol.
Ok so you were a moron and now are worried. You get what you deserve
Work more, clean more, cook more.. happy wife, happy life!
Are you taking those jabs or are you fighting back?
Do they not realize how naked it is to make and save money these days for the younger generations? I just moved to a new city after a breakup and even with a BA and 6 years of experience, and 10 years of general customer service experience, I couldn’t even get a call back from receptionist jobs. Not even 24 Hour Fitness. Sadly, a lot of 25 year olds still need help from their parents. Isn’t there a statistic floating around that almost half of all Millennials still live at home?
And I've never been able to experience any number of things that my parents have done. That doesn't mean that every time they do something they're obligated to invite me along.
At a certain point, you have to stop paying for your kids. 25 is a pretty reasonable place to draw this line.
The time to reveal a workplace relationship is when you're inviting coworkers to the wedding. There's just no other way/time to do this that makes sense. Besides, you're only six months into this so there's no telling how enduring it'll be. Just request the time off you both want and let the rumor mill go off if it's going to. Your task is to deflect and neither conform nor deny coworker suspicions. There may be no formal non fraternization policy at your workplace. But that doesn't mean this relationship won't end with one or both of you losing your job(s). Discretion is the most important thing when dating a professional colleague.
Unless I've done something and he's never told me, these are the fights we've had and the major issues in our relationship. I can't think of anything else he does that bothers me. And yes, that is really the extent of my drinking which is why his remark bothers me enough to list it.
I don't do anything to them. I give them a ride and talk to them.
But he’s not gonna be when he realizes that he’s going to marry someone who is doing something he didn’t sign up for. Stop assuming they are happy—he doesn’t deserve to get lied too, you should let him know what he’s dealing with at the very least.
Through car meets, it was a large group of maybe 30 people ranging from 16 to 26/27. When I first joined this group I was with someone a year older, after we split I stayed friends with lots of them and my now husband was just part of the group wasn't friends with him, more like acquaintance with his and gf at the time. Few year later hung around more with a group of people and just happened to click. Thought it would be a fling, but 9 years later here we are.
No everything is gross and creepy lol
You're both a mess, neither one more than the other.
Yeah I definitely did but I’m not going into detail live.
Won't it be expensive to live there as a stranger for that length of time? since you still have living expenses here too.
I think it's a valid reason to go, although it seems you aren't 100% sure that it will only be 4 months.
Possibly your SO's objections are related to such realistic factors as cost of living, uncertain length of staying there, as well as being in unfamiliar surroundings. People differ in how comfortable they'd be for something like that.
Thanks for the post! I was going to hit a down vote. Now I don’t have to
Unfortunately you are torturing yourself still. I have poly friends and my first take away is there is 100% communication. It comes down to she is willing to have pda with other partners: so which is it? She doesn’t actually like it or she does like it. If she doesn’t she isn’t with people she actually enjoys being with. I absolutely get the impression that she DOES LIKE PDA but she wants full control and manipulation of you. My husband is vanilla but he absolutely does things that I like and he enjoys that it makes me happy. I don’t have to pressure him. We talk about what we want and like and we edge out of the comfort zone together. You don’t have that, no matter how much you ask she won’t because she doesn’t love you or even respect you like that. You already paid her back by accepting her polyamory but doesn’t mean she gets to ignore how shitty she treats you, especially since you already have asked. Poly or not she’s not good to you. Block her and move on. There are poly therapists that could probably say it better than I can, but at the end of the day you are not compatible.
Make the best choice for YOU. Not him or any of your family. YOU.
If you want this pregnancy, go forward with it. This is the baby you’ve always wanted. At 38, you’re at a point in life where it will be harder to get pregnant. This pregnancy could be the one you always wanted.
And keep those angry at you at a distance. Don’t give them too much info and keep them away. If you go through with this pregnancy, you don’t want the stress from their reactions to harm you.
Or even trying to teach mom the language. Why cant they all get together and have a language session together. Mom helps the husband with learning her language, while husband helps the mom with learning his language. Win-win
So, let's start with the jerking off. He's allowed to masturbate. That's a private activity, and it's not an activity you're allowed to have any say in, and you should not expect to have any knowledge of how/when/where/how often he jerks off. Don't check the lube level, don't search through the trash can for crusty tissues, and don't ask him about it. Period. If he lied about it, it's because it's none of your business, and guys generally do not discuss their masturbation habits with their girlfriends. They just don't. And they often know how unreasonably insecure girlfriends can get about this topic–this subreddit is filled with examples.
Still talking to girls he had crushes on is potentially problematic, depending on the nature of those communications. People are sometimes friends with people that they are or were attracted to or people they previously hooked up with. That happens, and it's perfectly reasonable, as long as he's not CONTINUING to hook up with them and he's not pursuing them romantically or sexually in some way, or having an emotional affair of some sort. You don't indicate that any of that is happening, though, simply that he still talks to them. You say that he hid this fact from you–do you mean he lied about it? Or do you mean he simply never told you about it? Those are different things. And although I'm not a fan of lying in a relationship, he may have kept this info from you because he knew he wasn't doing anything wrong by staying friends with them but he also knew it would make you insecure so he didn't tell you about it.
Lying about how many people he'd been with. Hmm. Tough one. How many people did he originally tell you he'd been with, and how many people is it actually? And really, does it matter, as long as he's being an attentive, caring, faithful boyfriend now? His sexual past is just that, the past. YOU are his present. He wakes up every day and chooses to stay in a monogamous relationship with YOU, not with the women he's hooked up with in the past.
SAME SAME
any form of medical care
Maybe you should just learn to read.
Unfortunately you played a shitty game and won a shitty prize.
I'm not the most attractive person my wife has ever been with. She's not the most attractive person I've ever been with. Thankfully, that's not the most important thing in our relationship, and far from it. She's pretty, we get a long great, and I love her. Good enough for me.
I recently watched a show about stalkers and this is exactly how one of them started except it ended with him attempting to kill her multiple times. (The whole “if I can’t have you no one can” type of shit) Luckily he wasn’t successful but the woman basically said she would have done things differently like sternly turning him down instead of being nice about it. She would have stopped all contact immediately and made sure to let everyone around her know the details and collect evidence to get a restraining order early on.
I know it seems like that’s worse case scenario but no one is safe from these things happening. It’s always a possibility. It’s better to play it safe and do the most now (even if nothing occurs) rather than have something worse happen later.
I’d say the one thing you should do is block him, cease all contact and let your friends know.
I'd feel so unwanted by my bf if i wanted to hang out with him and every single time he'd pressure me to have sex. Like, do you not like anything else about your girlfriend? This gotta be a bait
Why would it be disrespectful for her to have sex in her home though? She lives there too and she‘s an adult, I don‘t see how that would be scandalous
You’d been in a relationship for less than a year and you’re already distant from your girlfriend and no longer sexually attracted to her. Maybe she’s not the one for you.
You almost cheated because you allowed yourself to be in that situation given your attraction to your friend. That woman is not a friend and not someone you can trust. Even if you decide to break up with your girlfriend, don’t enter into a relationship with your friend. If she has no issue cheating with her current SO, she will cheat on you too.
If you want to work on your relationship, you need to address the issues you have with your girlfriend. Block your friend and stop contacting her.
Back in college, I was pretty social. I liked hanging at friend’s houses and yes, would occasionally spend the night (especially after drinking).
That being said, I never once spent the night at a guy’s house who I was not romantically interested in – family being the only exception. Not saying she’s cheating on you, but if it looks like a duck and quacks like a duck….
That's where I'm at too. Him distancing himself from me this past week has been very hot too and shows he doesn't care when I said what he said hurt
seriously, masturbation at work? how tf does he himself think this is okay? thats ridiculous.
i hope he doesn't work at a kindergarten or some kinda shit.
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Why do you tolerate him calling you names? It sounds like he doesn’t respect you and love without respect is nothing at all.
I also lock my bedroom door just out of habit, from invasive parents even back in highschool, then college roommates etc, so I can totally believe it’s also possible
Sweep the leg
my god you’re a lost cause. do you wanna break up with him or no? stop playing stupid games with a man who clearly doesn’t respect you.
From what I have just read on syphilis, it is looking like it is a sexually transmitted disease and passed on through the sores. If he hasn’t had the sores when you have had sexual contact then it will be more difficult to transmit.
Unless it is a false positive. Have you noticed anything different about him ?
It’s not your life. Let him live his.
You go to a lawyer, like, yesteryear and you get 50/50 split. And let the lawyer know what she is trying to do. Gifts are gifts and shouldn't be considered in this. She is being gross. There is no middle ground.
I have something similar set up. Mostly for me because my husband can manage without the reminders but I'm a very forgetful person. I've a board out we can all see with daily tasks so it doesn't all pile up for the days off, a task book I keep handy and a agenda to keep myself organized.
My husband wasn't a huge fan of the board, because he can manage without but got used too and he appreciates that I'm no longer overwhelmed.
You claim in not sorry? If I was genuinely sorry what would that look like to you? I’m just acknowledging I can’t undo what I have done but I’m not the same person I was in 2015
I am so scared! We have a 3y and just moved to a new country. But if I ever find out that there was cheating, I am not staying with him.
Age can not be fooled forever.
You thibk it won't change, but her age will become increasingly visible some time after 30.
Get over it. She clearly did.
I’ll get shit for this, but I don’t understand this whole “stay at home wife” thing. Because it seems like both people are never enthusiastic about it. Your husband sounds like an ass, but he’s also probably annoyed. I can’t imagine going to work all day and my spouse staying home, without kids, and being happy about that. What could you possibly be doing all day?
You’re so young. Get out the house and get a job. If for nothing else, but to endure that you are financially secure if this continues to go south. There’s legitimately no reason for you to not be contributing financially and bettering yourself. Invest in you.
Wake up, OP. Your son is struggling with the divorce, a step mother and a new sibling. He's likely feel alone and replaced so he's acting out.
Has he been in therapy at all? Have you talked to him about the new partner, the new baby? Hell, have you talked to him at all to find out what might be up?
He needs someone in his corner. It's so painfully obvious the kid's acting out because of all the changes. Mix on top of that being a teenager.
Get him into therapy. Starting doing activities he likes with just the two of you. Talk to him.
Giving up will only show your son you don't care and want an easier second chance with your new family.
You’re making choices out of fear instead of based on what’s best for you.
Yes, the first thing I thought of when he got upset was I just don't want this to be a fight
2-3 times a week
He doesn't see it as ruining it. Just downsizing so it's more managable. The invitation are done and are being sent out today. Once again I will power through him being a stick in the mud. I know it's going to negatively effect our relationship but it's a sacrifice I'm willing to make. When I told our daughter I rented a church for her birthday she got so excited she wants a piñata at her party and she knew there couldn't be one in our house. I still have the feeling like I'm being incredibly disrespectful to my husband but I can't do another crappy birthday party in our house. Her third birthday was a disaster and it resulted in one of the moms pushing me because she wanted more space to take pictures with her kid. My extended family still complains about her first birthday because the house was so cramped and very hot.
2-3 times a week
Wait, so you were together while he was still with his ex? Of 9 years? Why would you think he would be faithful?
Either way, dinner with an ex and the ex doesn’t know about you? Very weird.
To everyone going “oh it was long ago, oh it's just silly things, bla blah”
This person is already actively engaged in destroying the OPs relationship with the family.
The situation described where she follows the op into the house and then pretends something happened and she runs away? This is setting the OP for 1. Being hated by the whole family, 2. Potential future assault charges.
OP: please make sure you're not around her ever again. This person is a full psychopath and I would not be surprised if dating your cousin turned out to be a ploy to get to you and fuck you up permanently.
No – this just isn’t true. It’s one thing in a jokey tone to your mates. In an angry snap at your partner it’s clearly, absolutely never okay. How much if a problem swearing at someone is is a tonal and situational thing, and that it’s colloquially okay to use that word sometimes doesn’t mean it’s okay by default until after a person objects. This one is cut-and-dried unacceptable.
Much as you're attracted to this guy you're just not a great match as long as he's cleaving to his version of his faith like this. Clearly not all Christians are pro-life and not all Christians are anti LGBTQ+. But if his views right now don't match with yours you're just a good fit for each other. However, he's 18 and his opinions on things will change as he matures. Just don't date him now.
report him! it's the same as a medical person looking up info they shouldn't. or a banker looking at accounts they shouldn't. give the manager your side. you should not be harassed at the gym, especially by the workers. maybe he's doing this to others. if anything, they can change his schedule or move him. also, block his number and turn your socials private until he's gone for good. this guy doesn't seem like he'll stop anytime soon. also, get cameras on your house. gyms have those details and more as part of your membership.