0 views
For good lucky [GOAL MET]
Date: October 12, 2022
AmateurPub
AmateurPub
For good lucky [GOAL MET]
He’s trying to condition you to be ok with his behavior. Don’t let this man change beat down your confidence and make you ok with this as a new normal. He wants you to change for him when he’s the one that needs to correct his behavior.
I point out nude girls to my girlfriend and she points them out to me, too. But, she knows she’s the most important and beautiful woman in the world to me.
Drinking at age 34 should even be a problem. He should have had enough experience drinking to know how to control himself and when to stop. You’re not wrong for canceling the vacation. That’s your way of letting him know how much that bothered you and that you don’t want to go through this again. You did the right thing. Hopefully he gets help or stops drinking. If you can find someone else to go on vacation with that would help you.
Well i think you have different values in what is sex mean for you.
But in this case i believe that boyfriend have a point, the fact that you don't overstep your relationship when become exclusive, doesn't mean that given the information that he have, that you have sex with your brothers friend, and now you want to hang out with him, is a overreaction. Is boundary that you should respect at least until he feels secure in your relationship.
To you is not big deal but him is, you should respect that, not minimize his feelings, because you don't see the big deal
And not for nothing your reaction and behavior for me would be a big red flag, because you said that apologize, but you don't see the damage this does to your relationship and trust. You refuse to see his side of the equation.
Good luck in whatever you decide
Block her and focus on moving on, she is the past, focus on your future.
She doesn't know when he will be back and made plans with her friend. She told him about her plans and he gave the ok because he didn't remember that he will be back at that time. Now he is upset and wants to “test her commitment” by …. not telling her when he will be back. What exactly is she supposed to do? Sit alone at home just in case he shows up without warning that day?
That's why people are shitting on OP. He is acting very childish and didn't communicate when he will be back or what his expectations are. Only after he does both and she still puts her friend before him does he have a reason to complain.
I really wish poly people wouldn’t behave in such a scummy manipulative way with others.
I realise that op’s girlfriend was open to being essentially flirted with here but the couple’s behaviour still feels really yucky.
Let me ask the part of your brain that thinks you're misreading the situation this: If you showed your girlfriend these photos, would she think that this person is just being friendly, or would she think that this friend is trying to make a move on you?
I'm willing to bet she would think the latter.
Tell this friend that you're not interested; be polite but firm. I don't think the friends of your friends would bail on you for that. In that unlikely case, though, were they that good of friends to start with? Anyone who abandons you because you refused to accept revealing pictures when you're in a relationship already doesn't have good sense.
I think everything will be fine, one way or another. You've got this!
Sounds like there's no future in that one. If it's hurting you too much already, maybe it's time to also rethink.
Thank you for the advice! I hope that asking him to be specific won't push him away. I feel like I deserve honesty about where our relationship is going since it's been 4 years going on 5. He seems to be very cautious based on his past relationships,though, all of his relationships were from highschool. I'm thinking he may need counseling since they seem to be affecting him. I'd be happy to go with him.
This is absolutely not okay of her to do that. Please don't feel forced to do things she wants if you're not a 100% okay with it. And you certainly shouldn't feel like you'd have to stay with a person that treats you this way.
You feel dead because your boyfriend is a psycho
It just feels better without a condom. It's a part of Mother Nature's big plan to make more babies.
There’s stuff you can do if things are getting a little stale…. The best way to get rid of a crush is distance. Avoid the guy, if you’ve talked in the past, don’t. Good luck ?
I did read your post. It does not matter what you look like. You are a grown ass man and she is a minor. It is wrong. It is creepy. You asked Reddit and got answers. Why ask if you are going to ignore everyone??
Wait why is no one saying to ask the person who sent the message who they are and how they know? Maybe they have more details
he's not playing his husband. he's being Santa and a Dad. I wouldn't want to miss Christmas morning with the kids.
and he actually left the house lol, like i was the one in the wrong
And it could be that those kisses and hugs are a prelude to sexual activity that the gf might not want at that time.
I think your husband is just unhappy and looking for a way to blame you.
Alternatively, he’s jealous that strangers don’t want sex with him.
I don’t know how you fix that, though.
His roommate is trying to have sex with his girl there gonna be drama tell him so he won’t think I reciprocated or like any of the roommates advances.
Probably right about the decision part, however it just amazed me (but not even that much) that she really didn't wanted to hear the reasons, it was lack of interest for sure, but the way she insisted on not wanting to hear them made me think it's more than just lack of interest.
Is your sister the one calling?
Apparently he and his sis frequent strip bars. Which wouldn't be a problem in a void, but compounded with this post's subject matter, eh, it might be weirder all around
I agree. His plan makes way more sense.
Her story is kind of suss. And she is giving off a bunch of red flags. Not going to rule out he isn’t up to anything but on the face of it she comes across as controlling and uncompromising. So no wonder he “coached” the son not to say anything. I mean she doesn’t even explain how he did that?
You definitely made the right choice. She only wants you there out of convience for herself. Meaning companionship. I don't think that would be so bad if she was honest but she's lying about it to keep you there. Some people feel it is better to have someone than no one. However if you choose to work things out with her let her know you can't have a functional relationship without sex. People always say sex is not a big deal for a relationship and as a woman I disagree. Sex is a way to connect and communicate feelings towards the person you are with. It builds a special bond between two people. It creates a deeper intimacy and it's needed for a romantic relationship to truly thrive.
I like rough sex as much as the next person but if you can’t also make love, it’s just “fucking”. Be single if that’s all you want.
I’m glad you have distance and perspective. I think the expectations that we place on 18 year old kids is ridiculous. They are still kids and responsible for making life altering choices. It’s crazy to me.
In private. You don’t want an audience if she turns you down.
Get your nights out with your friends. Be honest and tell her that it’s that or you have to consider ending the relationship. Put your foot down. Find all available resources for both of you. The disabled community is huge. She needs to find her place.
You should not stay with someone who is willing to hit you. There is no excuse for it. He doesn't even sound like he admits he was wrong or is sorry.
PUNCH EM BACK IN DA FACE N SEE HOW HE FEELS..OR SEND HIM TOO ME SO I CAN TAKE HIM N A FEW MORE OF MY SO CALLED PROBLEMS ON BOYS NIGHT OUT-_- A MIDNIGHT FISHING EXPEDITION ??
There is nothing in what you wrote to suggest this is a relationship to fight for. You shouldn't have to fight to convince your partner to get married. It should be something you're both eager and ready to do.
In fact everything you wrote suggests more and more this guy is just a waste of YOUR time, gross, manipulative, and not someone cut out to be a good father and partner. Please, see about getting out NOW and find someone ready to build the kind of relationship and family you want and deserve.
I'd tell her if she'd love to be in an open relationship, then she'd love to be single even more. Then I'd dump her ass.
I wouldn’t waste your time with this one. Doesn’t seem to understand boundaries.
How long have you and gf been together?
If you can’t talk to him about sex you shouldn’t be having sex with him.
Hello /u/ArElAb,
Your post was removed for the following reason(s):
Your title did not include at least two ages/genders or was not formatted correctly
Posts must:
include details about the involved parties including ages, genders, and length of relationship, and
request advice in real situations involving two or more people
We are enforcing the two rules listed above by making all titles start with ages/genders in the following format:
[##X][##X], [## X][## X], or [##-X][##-X] where ## is the age and X is the gender (currently M, F, T, A, NB, FTM, MTF but more can be added). You can have more than two ages/genders listed, but you must have at least two at the beginning of your title. Here is an example:
[34NB][88-F] We are two people in an example post
Please resubmit with a corrected title.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
Hello /u/Anon27813,
Your post was removed for the following reason(s):
Your title did not include at least two ages/genders or was not formatted correctly
Posts must:
include details about the involved parties including ages, genders, and length of relationship, and
request advice in real situations involving two or more people
We are enforcing the two rules listed above by making all titles start with ages/genders in the following format:
[##X][##X], [## X][## X], or [##-X][##-X] where ## is the age and X is the gender (currently M, F, T, A, NB, FTM, MTF but more can be added). You can have more than two ages/genders listed, but you must have at least two at the beginning of your title. Here is an example:
[34NB][88-F] We are two people in an example post
Please resubmit with a corrected title.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
Hello /u/The_Chloe_Frazer,
Your post was removed for the following reason(s):
Your title did not include at least two ages/genders or was not formatted correctly
Posts must:
include details about the involved parties including ages, genders, and length of relationship, and
request advice in real situations involving two or more people
We are enforcing the two rules listed above by making all titles start with ages/genders in the following format:
[##X][##X], [## X][## X], or [##-X][##-X] where ## is the age and X is the gender (currently M, F, T, A, NB, FTM, MTF but more can be added). You can have more than two ages/genders listed, but you must have at least two at the beginning of your title. Here is an example:
[34NB][88-F] We are two people in an example post
Please resubmit with a corrected title.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
You mean “isn’t the best”
Well then I’d definitely keep my defenses up if I were you, something doesn’t smell right about his reaction. Maybe get into couples counseling or insist he no longer drink without you present if his medication makes him that incapable of controlling himself when mixed with alcohol.
She is fucking someone else. Hopefully someone closer to her own age.
Hello /u/Dependent-Rice200,
Your post was removed for the following reason(s):
Your title did not include at least two ages/genders or was not formatted correctly
Posts must:
include details about the involved parties including ages, genders, and length of relationship, and
request advice in real situations involving two or more people
We are enforcing the two rules listed above by making all titles start with ages/genders in the following format:
[##X][##X], [## X][## X], or [##-X][##-X] where ## is the age and X is the gender (currently M, F, T, A, NB, FTM, MTF but more can be added). You can have more than two ages/genders listed, but you must have at least two at the beginning of your title. Here is an example:
[34NB][88-F] We are two people in an example post
Please resubmit with a corrected title.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
Hello /u/Ornery-Lawfulness872,
Your post was removed for the following reason(s):
Your title did not include at least two ages/genders or was not formatted correctly
Posts must:
include details about the involved parties including ages, genders, and length of relationship, and
request advice in real situations involving two or more people
We are enforcing the two rules listed above by making all titles start with ages/genders in the following format:
[##X][##X], [## X][## X], or [##-X][##-X] where ## is the age and X is the gender (currently M, F, T, A, NB, FTM, MTF but more can be added). You can have more than two ages/genders listed, but you must have at least two at the beginning of your title. Here is an example:
[34NB][88-F] We are two people in an example post
Please resubmit with a corrected title.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
I’m also taking into account the stats on personality traits and behaviors common to people that reach his level in business (especially in the tech industry). Then his actions with her and the trauma from his childhood and I’m not liking the odds of her getting out of this without getting hurt or worse.
I’m seeing Danger Will Robinson Danger going off in my head right now.
What the fuck is wrong with you? There is something fundamentally off with you. He lost his erection because of your disgusting personality. It is horribly unattractive. He has now learned not to stick his dick in crazy.
Wow, are double standards the only standards she has? Not sure what you could get out of this relationship now but doubt.
Hello /u/calman77,
Your post was removed for the following reason(s):
Your title did not include at least two ages/genders or was not formatted correctly
Posts must:
include details about the involved parties including ages, genders, and length of relationship, and
request advice in real situations involving two or more people
We are enforcing the two rules listed above by making all titles start with ages/genders in the following format:
[##X][##X], [## X][## X], or [##-X][##-X] where ## is the age and X is the gender (currently M, F, T, A, NB, FTM, MTF but more can be added). You can have more than two ages/genders listed, but you must have at least two at the beginning of your title. Here is an example:
[34NB][88-F] We are two people in an example post
Please resubmit with a corrected title.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
Under no circumstances do you respond for her or interact with him on her behalf. Even if she asks it’s generally a bad idea
You met him in AA? His life is not in order for a person his age. Neither is yours if that’s where you’re picking up men. Find someone less messy who has themselves together and don’t use AA as a dating gateway you’re focusing on the wrong thing if that’s what you’re taking away
Tell him all his comments actually have you considering getting your tubes tied. Bet he wouldn't like that
Really appreciate this. Thank you. Something I might add to the post that also explains this is that I’ve been cheated on 3 times in past relationships. I had a bad relationship with my family, and I assumed that’s what love looked like (based on how they treated me). And I sought out terrible people. So that really explains why my self confidence got this bad to begin with.
This would be excusable if he was a really young man but he is not. He has lived life for some time so he just doesn't care. You definitely should probably think about whether he is compassionate enough for you to marry.
Speaking as someone who became Jewish a few years ago, never convert to a different religion for anyone but yourself. If you start compromising your beliefs and practices for others, you lose parts of yourself that you’ll wish you’d kept later. At 18, you’re just starting your adult life and being pressured into making a huge change like religion is so unfair. Conversion is a big deal.
Don’t date people that are mean to you.
What she did you you was wrong, very wrong. The question is do you enjoy these conversations with your mom? After all she's put you through and even preventing you from having a wonderful life and family I do not think so. Do you want to put up with it knowing fully well she has caused you so much pain?. What you need to ask her is why did she do this to you? Why did she stop you from having friends at a young age, why did she change your major, why did she eventually push you away by forcing you to travel abroad? Did she ever think that all these actions wouldn't have repercussions not just with you but her. There must a reason why she chose to alienate her daughter.
So… there’s a big gaping hole in the information you’ve given.
You had an affair with someone at work, I got that. You left your wife, I got that too. But then why did you propose to your affair partner? Especially if you were feeling this way?
Sounds like you need to be single for a while, or only pursue relationships that DON’T end in marriage so you can work out who you are and what you really want.
As for your ex… I’d be inclined to think you’re looking at that relationship through rose-coloured glasses right now. If that relationship was truly as good as you say it is, and you loved her as much as you say you do, you wouldn’t have cheated. And you certainly wouldn’t have left her unless you had some pretty solid reasons to.
Yeah, they do that. Abusers will typically turn their behavior back around on you and make it your fault that they're treating you that way. It is not your fault.
Not married, no kids, why settle for that?
Right now your wife can't hear you when you say she's beautiful because it's so at odds with her internal reality. I've had this issue with my partner in the past. It took about 4 or 5 years before he was willing to accept that i find him attractive. It really helped for us to talk about our personal realities and for me to pull back on compliments based on physicality. Whenever he would insult himself, I'd reply with something like “I understand you believe that to be true, but I don't. I respect your right to feel what you feel. At the same time, you denying my reality in which I adore you and find you physically attractive hurts me in the same way as me complimenting you hurts you right now. You are my chosen partner and I treasure you, no matter how you feel about yourself.”
You can't undo decades of abuse by telling someone something they're going to immediately reject as ridiculous, no matter how true it is to you (or even if it's objectively true). What you're going to want to do is figure out a way, like the example I shared above, to disrupt her internal narrative without running headfirst into the darkest part of it. Pick at its edges and the smaller lies that support the big lies. Do things that show her without words that you treasure her, but stay away from the physical compliments until she can hear you again.
Encourage her to cut off her sister. And her parents if her parents enable her sister. Find a good trauma therapist, maybe one that does internal family systems, EMDR, or somatic experiencing. She's acting like her touch will infect you or taint you, or that she's unworthy of any affection. This is really deep wound and you can't do this alone. If you can't get her to agree to therapy, get your own therapist (probably wise anyway) and get some general advice on how to help her hear you again.
She probably always has a version of this running through her head, but this destroyed her defenses that allow her to function. Behavioral or talk therapy might not touch it because they're not really intended for use with stuff this traumatic. It's like using a bandaid when you need a tourniquet. Yeah, it'll do something, but it's not really helpful.
Dude, leave this chick ASAP. And, stop having sex immediately so you don't accidentally have a child with her and then you're stuck with her for life.
There's a scene in The Good Place where a character realizes how much he's hurt people in his life because he rigidly stuck to promises. His example is that he didn't take his mother to her surgery because he's already promised his landlord's nephew that he would help him with his phone.
Just something to think about…
Sounds like you'll be better off single.
Just because you can make something work, doesn't mean you should.
Thank you, but I really think he does want therapy. Based on his breakdown after the incident, he knows his trauma is serious and he knows now how important it is to get therapy.
Um, go with him and the dog for walks. Share in the joy of being on trail or at a dog park together. Rebond over the baby.
Are you fucking serious? He gave you everything he could. He helped you every way he could. And how did you repay his kindness? With rude, foul, disgusting behavior. He offered you everything and you spat in his face for it. And you want him back!? You are a vile person. You have already done plenty of damage. For the love of all that is holy, let this man move on and find someone who will not treat him like absolute garbage. Please just let him be happy
I don't understand why you would want to be in a relationship with someone who disgusts you multiple times a day, every single day. And while gaslighting is a heavily overused term on this subreddit…this feels like a prime example. He is never going to stop doing it, never going to acknowledge it, and if he knows he does it, he cares more about his own ego and embarrassing himself than he does about you.
Sure you, can show him the video, he can get mad about it, but he won't change. He will most certainly make it all about you filming him and “how dare you do that” to turn it around on you.
Do you maybe feel he is too agreeable? Like he’s relying on making you happy too much and not having a direction of where he wants to go?
If nobody's cheating, just let him know what you want. The odd man will have a bad reaction, but most will be flattered.
Your wife is abusive.
Yep. As a woman who spent 10k on my ex while he was “platonically” entertaining an online female friend and such ultimately led to me dumping him. Don't do it. Only if you're married and share finances.
I don’t understand that mentality at all. Just because relationships and children are nude means young people shouldn’t have them? Relationships are hard at any age, the only difference is that our brains are more malleable and developing at 20, which gives us opportunities to better adapt and grow in our relationships, something people with fully developed brains can’t do as well.
Play the long game. No confrontation. The relationship is over. Set them up. Most bussineses have no relationship policies. When your ready to go inform their hr. Start saving in a seperate acc. Get the dna test. Then leave and dont look back.
Re-read the post and OPs responses. He don’t know she had a boyfriend until she said she’s “not single.”
Once he found out he apologized and they, as adults, are able to remain friends.
That's not the case at all, as you'll see from reading my other comments. I *am* happy for her – and it's entirely possible to be happy for someone, but have no interest in wanting to know her partner.
As I've explained, this has never been an issue before, when she with her last boyfriend. He wasn't too bothered about meeting me, my friend knew I wasn't bothered about meeting him, she accepted and respected that, and that's just how things were.
So, why can't that be the case again?
If your wife tries to cause you physical pain you divorce her.
It's best to be honest. I think this one of the things that matter with the past sexwork, infidelity and STD's etc. There is a lot people that won't be okay with dating someone that's done sex-work and that's something you have to accept as that consequence of your choice to do that work, I personally wouldn't.
Ultimately if he is the right guy for you he will be okay with it if not then he wasn't right for you, so best to be honest, the earlier the better.
It takes 10 minutes to install a $40 bidet to a toilet seat, even if you can barely use a screwdriver. Even if you only rent; you can take it with you if you move.
Talk to him, tell him how you feel.
You are emotionally cheating. End it with your boyfriend
No. You do not give crazy access to your safe zone. The fact that you need to ask this question really makes me fear for you and your children. Your boundaries are nonexistent.
Let the poor guy find someone who is interested in what kind of partner he is, since you only value the surface shit.
Keep the baby. Lose the husband. Prepare to be a single parent with a custody arrangement.
Or…don’t keep the baby. It is your decision, but whichever you choose, there will be consequences. Decide which one is easier to online with.
Stop having sex with strangers. Have some self respect and improve your judgement. It’s that simple.
So this is the FOURTH time you've posted about this guy.
Either suck it up and accept you're ok with a guy who controls you, accuses you of cheating, makes you question yourself, is a HUGE hypocrite, doesn't trust you, etc OR actually do something about it and leave.
Nobody is going to be able to help you here because most people are not going to understand how or why you’ve married someone without having sex. Either he’s gay, asexual or something else, but either way – why would you put up with any of it for another second? You aren’t being seen or fulfilled in your marriage.
Bragging about fitness and bodybuilding, plus insatiable sexual urges. I think you might have a point.
OP if you're taking steroids, especially if it's more than just test, that's probably what's doing it for you.
You have the power to stop him. Block him and go no contact.
Yes. I think OP should include what state this is…..it matters ?
Wank louder with porn to assert dominance.
You should be dating the son, not the dad.
It seems like you want different things. Your heart is set on London understandably, she doesn't like London and let's be honest, I don't blame her.
It is best to go your separate ways. It sounds like you really need to focus on your career, the qualification and get set and then look for a relationship. Also she is older than you too, perhaps you need to find someone that's not in as much of a rush and a Londoner.
The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence.
“that's fine, have a good life”
in the end you are lucky this happened now and not after you wasted half your life on her…
Uhh…what?
In my mind, I play it out better where the “friend” and the boyfriend get deated and she starts kicking it to him… and OP swoops in as a surprise waitress (having greased some palms to borrow an apron and servers' tray$$$) to ask if she can start the “friend” off with anything…. A drink… appetizer… her own fucking man, perhaps?”.
Okay y’all been together for 3years was this like your first time ever being like that or do you have a history of getting sloppy drunk?
From OP comments he’s been telling his gf that he doesn’t like going to concerts. What more communicating should it take?
Tell him he is not welcome and you will not be seeing him if he decides to visit your area. Block him on everything and do not respond to anything from him. Keep any emails or texts to show you told him to stop and any he sends to you.
If worse comes to worse, go to the police. Can you put cameras up? Don't answer the door if he shows up.
Hahahhahaha, sorry but how stupid are you?
There is no way at all that you can tell him that you no longer want to have sex anymore, and not have it hurt him.
I get where you’re coming from, but you really don’t seem to realise that your BF loves you, he tried, and probably felt disgusted with himself when he had sex with someone else. He wants you, and only you if he’s in this relationship.
You telling him that sex will never happen again is going to end your relationship, if it doesn’t happen straight away, it will happen as he slowly starts to resent you. You should be able to see this with his current communication with you saying he can’t wait to see you again etc.
You would probably be better to just end the relationship (and no there is no chance at all in any way that a friendship will work after this, at least not without time apart) if you truly want to reduce the effects on him.
I'd do some very thorough digging. There have been plenty of posts on Reddit where one partner is falsely accused because someone wants to break them up (some batshit crazy MIL), or someone else who wanted the partner for themselves.
I would say that at least 80% of modern boudoir photography involves some nudity
You feel bad cause a guy said “maybe do some naked” and the OPs idiot wife said “sure”?
Don't ghost him. Follow through with a text. There's nothing wrong with being polite, whether the person deserves politeness or not. Be the bigger person as you were originally intending to. If you do everything by the book, there will be nothing to weigh on your conscience, and you can move on in a healthy way.
You can block him after sending a text, if you're worried about him trying to manipulate the situation.
Same, nothing facetious in my previous reply. ✌️ No ill will or bad blood at all.
I can’t imagine that you would ever be in a situation like this again but dude next time call a friend or an Uber.
So you were there? How did it escalate? Like did you ok a lap dance and then she did the nipple bit?
How often is he staying back at the office to play pool
I've tried to initiate round 2 a handful of times. He just falls asleep. Says he can't bounce back that fast, which I know isn't the case because he HAS before, just chooses not to. I'm tempted to get him off as soon as he gets to my house, then wait a few hours and go again. It all comes back to “if you want to, you will”.
I very much feel like that now, to salvage my relationship with her from my end I need to either say something or distance myself, however it’s hot to distance when my partner is her nephew and they are close, I would very much like him to deal with it. As I do not yet feel comfortable in my relationship with her to say something, however I do not think even he feels comfortable to say something lol so then I feel like it has to be me
If I were you, I'd be seriously considering continuing a relationship with this guy. You sound way more committed to the relationship than he is. Perhaps it is time to cut your losses and start afresh. You're young still, the world has much better options out there for you.
I used to have room mates until two years ago and it made sense to spend time at his place. I guess I thought it would change once I lived alone, but it hasn’t.
Okay, you go first. I refuse to spend my hot earned money on that.
Wow, nasty and so dishonest.
“Why won’t you budge on having the baby you said you want?”
What the hell is wrong with you and why are you so upset over the idea of an adult woman choosing to keep her pregnancy?
Pure Reddit trash.
Have you mentioned how it makes you feel to her? What was her response?
but some of the stuff she finds out about him just seems like she is taking it too far and it’s not relevant to what she needs to learn.
It probably is. She’s already told you why. I can’t tell if you’re being intentionally obtuse or if there’s something I’m missing. She’s interested, she wants to talk about it. If you don’t use your words and say so. It’s only a problem if after you’ve communicated she ignores your request. Hitler won’t appear if you say his name in the mirror 3 times.