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Date: November 17, 2022
This is it. For people who are not caring/ empathetic by default, they can change when a person they love/want to be with has no tolerance for their bullshit and sort of demands change.
My ex was like this. He only changed and started to show compassion once I made it abundantly clear that his current nonchalant selfish ways of being was a dealbreaker. And if he didn't smarten up and start treating me with the same level of consideration that I showed him I'd be out.
Putting my foot down and not enabling him/ accepting his excuses was key. And then he finally came around and had an awakening about how empathy breeds connection and actually feels good. Idk if that change stuck, but it is possible (however, not something to bet on as it's definitely not a given).
And this, ladies, is why you should always make your own bag and not depend on others’ (specially men’s) money. They will use it against you as soon as they get the opportunity to
She's not being punished. She's being asked to support the child that she's a parent of by going to work. No relationship equals no benefit of the relationship. They are now two single parents who need to figure it out.
You don't get to have your cake and eat it too. Actions have consequences. It's that simple. She needs to learn to live alone since this is the life she chose for herself.
Have you ever heard the term “love isn’t always enough”? Well, it’s true. Sometimes you can care a lot for a person, but you don’t want the same things, you’re not in the same place, or someone isn’t ready to make a step that the other is. It’s always okay to leave. It shows that you have self worth for the things you want and are looking for. It’s possible that you guys can continue to communicate on this. His fears are in a way reasonable if you’ve been fighting, regardless if this is the main cause. Either way, I wish you peace! Just remember that you are capable of loving, and being loved in return. It’s always important to stand your ground with your needs, and you’ve shown yourself that.
You’re right. Aside from people just being transphobic, the community is chasing away true allies by trying to force things that aren’t true. For example, calling breastfeeding women chest feeders or saying that trans women get periods the same as biological women. If we could accept our differences and understand that being different doesn’t mean you aren’t valid, I think the world can get along so much better.
just curious, if OP demands paternity test will it change anything? i mean obviously it's not her child and (i hope!) they don't have any texts in which she agrees to have a kid.
Before you say anything to him, find a way to get out of this marriage safely. If he’s acting this unhinged with her, he may hurt you as well.
I would talk to any support people – family, friends, etc – as well as a lawyer, before you do anything. Try to act normal while you get your ducks in a row. And then get out safely.
There are women who convince themselves that if they dont act enthusiastic about their partner's kinks that the partner will find it elsewhere. Take a big dick up your ass and get back to us.