You don't on-line your life to please other random people. Sounds like there was a misunderstanding and it was presented to them that way, yet they are holding a grudge. You have a right to tell your girlfriend that you don't want to meet the people who talked shit behind your back again. It's not a you problem, it's a them problem.
This is very disheartening to read. You went from one lousy relationship to another. You need to get out of this relationship and go to therapy. You need to find out why you choose to be with people that do not respect or cherish you.
That’s reproductive abuse she committed. You know that right? If she truly believed she couldn’t get pregnant, she wouldn’t have lied about her birth control. She knew she could, so she lied that she was on it, when she wasn’t. She either wanted a kid (whether for herself or to trap you or some other reason, who knows), or she didn’t care if she got pregnant but just didn’t want to bother with birth control and yet still have sex.
Leave. Get a custody agreement, visitation and pay child support. Document everything she has done and use it in court. You may even want to go for full custody yourself. I mean, so you really want your son to spend most of his life in the household of a woman who is this manipulative?
1 get a DNA test, as the dad you have the right to find our, a normal pregnancy women wouldn't block the father of her baby
2 don't sign anything
This includes getting her a loan, signing a house or paying rent for her It will screw u over for years
3 if ur in the US do NOT have your name on the birth certificate as that traps so many men and if it turns out that rhe baby isn't yours… u accept parental right and in some states you could face jail time if u don't pay child support
4 done EVER give her cash
If she needs something, get it for buy never give her cash… u end up as her personal cash cow
5 don't marry her
Dispite what some people think…..marrying the mother of your future child rare goes well now a days
6 have all commutation through text
If she's the petty kind be wary hence text communication, one day it could save your ass
7 if the kid is you're open a trust fund for your kid and don't tell her about it, especially if she's in financial trouble
8 you can physically buy a range of baby products from dummies, tapppies amd loafs I mean loads of baby wipes
9 ask her to send you amazon wish list and see what to can do
10 save money
Again she might be petty snd easily jealous… especially if you get a new GF and stops letting you see the kid… with the money you saved you can lawyer up more easily also if there's a health emergency you can cover the cost with less hardship on yourself
I'm a 32 female and so many people give alot of men crap for not sticking around and I applaud you for wanting to provide
Chose your partners more carefully, use protection and expect at least 18 years of drama
If you can reach out to her parents that you want to support her they might kick her up the ass
Both of you need therapy or something to improve your relationship as being on terrible terms isn't good or heathly
1 get a DNA test, as the dad you have the right to find our, a normal pregnancy women wouldn't block the father of her baby
2 don't sign anything
This includes getting her a loan, signing a house or paying rent for her It will screw u over for years
3 if ur in the US do NOT have your name on the birth certificate as that traps so many men and if it turns out that rhe baby isn't yours… u accept parental right and in some states you could face jail time if u don't pay child support
4 done EVER give her cash
If she needs something, get it for buy never give her cash… u end up as her personal cash cow
5 don't marry her
Dispite what some people think…..marrying the mother of your future child rare goes well now a days
6 have all commutation through text
If she's the petty kind be wary hence text communication, one day it could save your ass
7 if the kid is you're open a trust fund for your kid and don't tell her about it, especially if she's in financial trouble
8 you can physically buy a range of baby products from dummies, tapppies amd loafs I mean loads of baby wipes
9 ask her to send you amazon wish list and see what to can do
10 save money
Again she might be petty snd easily jealous… especially if you get a new GF and stops letting you see the kid… with the money you saved you can lawyer up more easily also if there's a health emergency you can cover the cost with less hardship on yourself
I'm a 32 female and so many people give alot of men crap for not sticking around and I applaud you for wanting to provide
Chose your partners more carefully, use protection and expect at least 18 years of drama
If you can reach out to her parents that you want to support her they might kick her up the ass
Both of you need therapy or something to improve your relationship as being on terrible terms isn't good or heathly
Thank you for this, you’re totally right. I was brought up exceptionally polite and make sure to be as helpful and kind as possible when spending time with them but they just can’t stand the sight of me for some reason! I wouldn’t even class myself as conventionally unattractive, it’s just the style is not conventional you know? It’s so shallow of them tbh but it just makes me feel like I’m never going to find someone
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Then telling them and weathering the storm is your only option. I’d also consider if I’d really want Feminazis as friends. There is a fine line between being revolutionary and hateful.
Yeah its easy for him to change his mind because its not him giving up his body, mental health and subsequent free time for the rest his life. Mens lives do not change the same way womens do in parenthood. Do not just have a child to appease him and make him stay. You will resent him, you might resent the child for the changes you go through, and you have to be realistic here youll probably be the one doing most of the childcare. If this was not in your life plan dont do it. Now if youre just on the fence you could always freeze your eggs and wait so that youre not at a total loss if you change your mind later in life. Regardless, im sorry this is happening OP and wouldnt wish this situation on my enemy it is very heartbreaking to realize you and your partner want different things suddenly.
I know this has 0 to do with the post, but the thing u did like you quoting the person, and then making it large how do you do that? I’ve seen it everywhere and I figured Ild just ask
facepalm Why would you want to keep tabs on a girl you just had a “raunchy ” hook up with? Not really smart you told her a hook up story and not smart you argued with her about this. Most girls would have reacted like she did.
I don't really agree with her following an ex but it's much better than a random raunchy hook up. If you don't care why would you bother arguing just to be right. The point is it bothered her and the girl was a random hook up. Your gfs feelings should be more important than being right.
I definitely do not think this is okay, I just got put into a very difficult situation and I got put here suddenly and my eyes have been opening more and more every month
This good cop bad cop thing seems to be working. He is still playing the game. He feels accomplished winning and he also gets challenged losing. He is learning strategies both ways. If both parents were pummeling him in the game he would probably lose interest and believe he is just not cut out for it and move on.
Don't talk to her again. Someone who tries to gaslight you in a situation like this is very likely going to try that again. Not the kind of person I'd want anything to do with. ??♂️
I was going to comment this. If you have resentment now, magnify it by 10 in a few years!! If you stay together long enough it could/will turn into hatred.
If she's her own boss then she doesn't want to be in a relationship. Better off without her.
Things are supposed to be different in a relationship, especially at this point and when you have kids. Just taking off on a trip without even consulting anyone or caring about her family and responsibilities. She is very selfish.
She didn't even consider that part at all and instead got defensive and argumentative before anything even started. She sounds just awful tbh.
Does the relationship add to your life and happiness? Does it bring you feelings of happiness and security?
Is your life better with this relationship than without it?
God this generation is so messed up.
Longer you leave it the worse it'll be
You don't on-line your life to please other random people. Sounds like there was a misunderstanding and it was presented to them that way, yet they are holding a grudge. You have a right to tell your girlfriend that you don't want to meet the people who talked shit behind your back again. It's not a you problem, it's a them problem.
This is very disheartening to read. You went from one lousy relationship to another. You need to get out of this relationship and go to therapy. You need to find out why you choose to be with people that do not respect or cherish you.
DO NOT DATE FOR AT LEAST A YEAR.
You need to get emotionally and mentally healthy.
Wait for what? Flirt girl!!
Brother, dont stay, the only thing that will happen is more hurt. LEAVE, now please. If you want any peace for the future, act now.
Yes it is normal to not bleed and to not be in pain.
Allow me to refer you back to the original post.
That’s reproductive abuse she committed. You know that right? If she truly believed she couldn’t get pregnant, she wouldn’t have lied about her birth control. She knew she could, so she lied that she was on it, when she wasn’t. She either wanted a kid (whether for herself or to trap you or some other reason, who knows), or she didn’t care if she got pregnant but just didn’t want to bother with birth control and yet still have sex.
Leave. Get a custody agreement, visitation and pay child support. Document everything she has done and use it in court. You may even want to go for full custody yourself. I mean, so you really want your son to spend most of his life in the household of a woman who is this manipulative?
I would leave her alone for now
Also she's acting immature
Don't fall for her tricks
1 get a DNA test, as the dad you have the right to find our, a normal pregnancy women wouldn't block the father of her baby
2 don't sign anything
This includes getting her a loan, signing a house or paying rent for her It will screw u over for years
3 if ur in the US do NOT have your name on the birth certificate as that traps so many men and if it turns out that rhe baby isn't yours… u accept parental right and in some states you could face jail time if u don't pay child support
4 done EVER give her cash
If she needs something, get it for buy never give her cash… u end up as her personal cash cow
5 don't marry her
Dispite what some people think…..marrying the mother of your future child rare goes well now a days
6 have all commutation through text
If she's the petty kind be wary hence text communication, one day it could save your ass
7 if the kid is you're open a trust fund for your kid and don't tell her about it, especially if she's in financial trouble
8 you can physically buy a range of baby products from dummies, tapppies amd loafs I mean loads of baby wipes
9 ask her to send you amazon wish list and see what to can do
10 save money
Again she might be petty snd easily jealous… especially if you get a new GF and stops letting you see the kid… with the money you saved you can lawyer up more easily also if there's a health emergency you can cover the cost with less hardship on yourself
I'm a 32 female and so many people give alot of men crap for not sticking around and I applaud you for wanting to provide
Chose your partners more carefully, use protection and expect at least 18 years of drama
If you can reach out to her parents that you want to support her they might kick her up the ass
Both of you need therapy or something to improve your relationship as being on terrible terms isn't good or heathly
I would leave her alone for now
Also she's acting immature
Don't fall for her tricks
1 get a DNA test, as the dad you have the right to find our, a normal pregnancy women wouldn't block the father of her baby
2 don't sign anything
This includes getting her a loan, signing a house or paying rent for her It will screw u over for years
3 if ur in the US do NOT have your name on the birth certificate as that traps so many men and if it turns out that rhe baby isn't yours… u accept parental right and in some states you could face jail time if u don't pay child support
4 done EVER give her cash
If she needs something, get it for buy never give her cash… u end up as her personal cash cow
5 don't marry her
Dispite what some people think…..marrying the mother of your future child rare goes well now a days
6 have all commutation through text
If she's the petty kind be wary hence text communication, one day it could save your ass
7 if the kid is you're open a trust fund for your kid and don't tell her about it, especially if she's in financial trouble
8 you can physically buy a range of baby products from dummies, tapppies amd loafs I mean loads of baby wipes
9 ask her to send you amazon wish list and see what to can do
10 save money
Again she might be petty snd easily jealous… especially if you get a new GF and stops letting you see the kid… with the money you saved you can lawyer up more easily also if there's a health emergency you can cover the cost with less hardship on yourself
I'm a 32 female and so many people give alot of men crap for not sticking around and I applaud you for wanting to provide
Chose your partners more carefully, use protection and expect at least 18 years of drama
If you can reach out to her parents that you want to support her they might kick her up the ass
Both of you need therapy or something to improve your relationship as being on terrible terms isn't good or heathly
Thank you for this, you’re totally right. I was brought up exceptionally polite and make sure to be as helpful and kind as possible when spending time with them but they just can’t stand the sight of me for some reason! I wouldn’t even class myself as conventionally unattractive, it’s just the style is not conventional you know? It’s so shallow of them tbh but it just makes me feel like I’m never going to find someone
Hello /u/zachred22,
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I'd even wager that the guy just brought it to make OP feel calmer. “Look, you're safe. This is a big visual symbol of protection.”
Hello /u/Thepenguin687,
Your post was removed for the following reason(s):
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Please resubmit with a corrected title.
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Then telling them and weathering the storm is your only option. I’d also consider if I’d really want Feminazis as friends. There is a fine line between being revolutionary and hateful.
Yeah its easy for him to change his mind because its not him giving up his body, mental health and subsequent free time for the rest his life. Mens lives do not change the same way womens do in parenthood. Do not just have a child to appease him and make him stay. You will resent him, you might resent the child for the changes you go through, and you have to be realistic here youll probably be the one doing most of the childcare. If this was not in your life plan dont do it. Now if youre just on the fence you could always freeze your eggs and wait so that youre not at a total loss if you change your mind later in life. Regardless, im sorry this is happening OP and wouldnt wish this situation on my enemy it is very heartbreaking to realize you and your partner want different things suddenly.
I know this has 0 to do with the post, but the thing u did like you quoting the person, and then making it large how do you do that? I’ve seen it everywhere and I figured Ild just ask
Yep, cheating. No question about it.
facepalm Why would you want to keep tabs on a girl you just had a “raunchy ” hook up with? Not really smart you told her a hook up story and not smart you argued with her about this. Most girls would have reacted like she did.
I don't really agree with her following an ex but it's much better than a random raunchy hook up. If you don't care why would you bother arguing just to be right. The point is it bothered her and the girl was a random hook up. Your gfs feelings should be more important than being right.
That’s the way. Say hello, goodbye. Don’t engage any further.
I definitely do not think this is okay, I just got put into a very difficult situation and I got put here suddenly and my eyes have been opening more and more every month
Assuming you locked in a good mortgage rate I would not be selling….
I would rent out my property
If you sell is your choice
This good cop bad cop thing seems to be working. He is still playing the game. He feels accomplished winning and he also gets challenged losing. He is learning strategies both ways. If both parents were pummeling him in the game he would probably lose interest and believe he is just not cut out for it and move on.
Oh sorry, I only saw your 1st link somehow!
And I'm saying if she didn't want to accept it she wouldn't. There's no trying and failing here. She wants it so she's taking it.
Thanks we are planning on getting married and me adopting the kid.
None of your business any more than it is for him to share that he saw you there.
Calling a group of women a “coven” is weird as fuck.
I'd arrange for male family memebers or even the police to be there when this goes down.
You’ve been to his house twice and he wants you to on-line with him? Another big red flag. Run.
Thank you so much
Dude…
Don't talk to her again. Someone who tries to gaslight you in a situation like this is very likely going to try that again. Not the kind of person I'd want anything to do with. ??♂️
Why would you want to continue being with someone that you feel cheated on you and treat you like he did?
I was going to comment this. If you have resentment now, magnify it by 10 in a few years!! If you stay together long enough it could/will turn into hatred.
You want to continue the relationship with the guy your sister was talking to and have a relationship with your sister? Did I misread that?
“But the dick is so good that I'm in love”
If she's her own boss then she doesn't want to be in a relationship. Better off without her.
Things are supposed to be different in a relationship, especially at this point and when you have kids. Just taking off on a trip without even consulting anyone or caring about her family and responsibilities. She is very selfish.
She didn't even consider that part at all and instead got defensive and argumentative before anything even started. She sounds just awful tbh.
girl bye get a life