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Date: October 31, 2022
AmateurPub
Do people reallly go from abusive/alcoholic to family man over night?
No. They don't.
Why couldn’t he do that for me?
He didn't change. His current GF and baby will suffer for it.
Why am I so hurt even though I know I dodged a bullet?
You need to self introspect on that. Becuase, he is toxic. But you seem to like toxic. Alot of people do.
Seek couples financial counseling. In addition to wedding budget, as a couple set short and long term goals. Figure out how, together, you will achieve them.
He just decides and states what he's going to do.
I agree with the comments saying you should split your finances again; let your girlfriend know she’s more than free to finically support her sister, but with her own money after she’s already paid her share of the bills. She may be her sister, but she’s not your sister and you don’t owe her anything — especially with the emotional immaturity she’s displayed. Sorry to say it, but I have a feeling your girlfriend’s mom will be raising another kid — my grandma did when my mom had me at 18 (but she at least tried.)
That might be the case, but in the West (where I'm presuming OP is from and where his girlfriend is receiving higher education!!!) that is highly unusual. I can appreciate getting married quickly, as some cultures frown upon having premarital sex, but I'm not familiar with any cultures where the trajectory goes from higher education -> baby -> marriage? I'm concerned this woman is trying to baby trap OP, as that's what every sign is indicating here.. I'm not degrading other cultures
You do know what to do, it's just scary and you don't want to admit it to yourself.
I've been there too. You want him to be someone he's refusing to be, and it's hot to give up on what you thought your future would be.
The move sounds like the perfect opportunity to cut ties. Grieve what might have been, but don't waste your precious life catering to someone who refuses to do the most basic tasks because he assumes you don't have the confidence and self worth to demand better.
You deserve better. It's out there. Learn from this one.
Sounds like a plan!
So, he got what he deserved? Hopefully he learned his lesson?
Imagine your response if the genders were reversed.
I apologise if you found it gross and in my opinion, I do think there are others whom also dated with teenagers.
Sure, it still grants a conversation in any case