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TamaraMilano, 34 y.o.
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Date: October 12, 2022
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Hey, don't sell yourself short. You can be a white knight *and* not be perfect. Mental illness and drug use are not moral failures. (Crime might be a problem, but let's leave that for now.)
That said, lying is a moral failure, and that includes omitting important truths. You haven't known her that long, which normally would excuse you from full disclosure, but if you are talking about a relationship, that swings you back toward sharing something.
At this point, you don't have to go into minute detail, but letting her know you have a checkered past (or other deliberately vague reference) will let you see how she reacts.
You also don't have to confess things you've done, but you can be more open about your own values. If you say something like, “I honestly don't think all drug use is bad. It's your body; you can put into it what you want, or not,” you can talk about ideas rather than experiences.
Same thing with mental illness. You can talk about your experiences and feelings rather than label them with a diagnosis. Depression might feel like the blues, low energy, lack of hope. “Some days it's nude to get out of bed, you know?” Chances are good that she will.
If she is naive as you say, these conversations might be the first time she's encountered these ideas, and she might need time and talk to fine tune her values.
If you've seen the movie “Grease”, the “bad girl” character sings a song called, “There Are Worse Things I Could Do”. If your girl knows it, she might already have an inkling that you can have a few vices without being a cheater or a liar.
You have a good life and she will add nothing to it.
If she had managed to turn her life around after going through all of that effort then yes you could see that her coming back into your life would be fine. However that is not the case and in fact, she has not changed one bit. She is still that same horrible person that “raised” you.
So why bother? She has made no effort to turn her life around so why should she be “rewarded”?
Yeah fair enough. Will take that on