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Room for on-line sex video chat Swizel
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Languages: en
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Body Type: bodyTypeThin
Ethnicity: ethnicityIndian
Hair color: hairColorBlack
Eyes color: eyeColorBlack
Subculture: subcultureRomantic
Date: November 12, 2022
Sounds like his fantasy didn't work out as he expected it to.
Just going to chime in here and ask…
What if OP isn't “picking their friend over their partner” but is instead
Wishing their partner was okay with them having friends of the opposite sex like their partner does?
In other words…not picking their friend, but picking the ability to have friends. I'd say that's a much more fair toss up. If my gf was upset that I wanted to go cheer up a friend, male or female, and they said I couldn't because it makes them uncomfortable, TO ME that becomes a new issue.
Not that she's unfortunate in and of itself being the important part. But why.
Because it's not her. And it's okay for that to not be okay with people. Insecurity isn't a trait that should be coddled or encouraged. Especially when a double standard according to OP.
Like, yes, consider your partners feelings. But they have to consider yours too. Idk how everyone on Reddit misses this, lol. If I was told I couldn't go see a friend for whatever reason, I'd be upset.
Now, if, say, I went out and chose to party with the boys instead of be there for my child's birth, that's a different story. In the same vein, this is about recognizing imposing limitations vs not being considerate of another's feelings.
OP offering to include GF when she made her feelings known?
Considerate of feelings, a good solution and compromise.
BF rejecting solution? Incident's to OP and their GF. However, asking the GF to come into their time honored tradition just because she's insecure about it (for good reason or not, I kind of agree with her that it's a bit tactless to not think ANYTHING of it or reassure her BEFORE she confronts you about it) is insecure to the BF and bf. Imposing strict limitation on OP that they can't do it because it makes them uncomfortable? That's a discussion. Why? Can it be resolved? It doesn't feel fair on my side because you have tons of male friends (fair) to which GF replies she wouldn't go on holiday with them though (also fair) to which OP replies that this has been a long standing thing and there's nothing AT ALL between them and she needn't worry and again, the male friends thing. If he has to be okay with it, she should too, even if the capacity is a bit different. Now, at this point, the friend becomes the problem, because she is disregarding OP and his GFs feelings, maybe for a good reason, but OP needs to know why to know how to proceed, at which point the likely answer will be it makes them unfortunate to have a judgemental insecure third wheel hanging along, and OP should grow a pair, at which point the ball is back in OP and GFs court for if she can get over it or if his ability to have friends or not is more important than his desire to have a gf.
To me, once it becomes you can have female friends but you can't take a trip with them but I'ma hang around all these dudes I've been with or haven't been with before…that seems like a double sided limitation/restriction/imposition. And seems possibly like projection from somebody who cheats. But could just be simple insecurity. Point is…she can have her cake and eat it too, but OP can only have their cake if it's the right flavor that she likes. But… it's not her fucking cake lol if OP let's her hang out with all these dudes in any capacity and WOULD be okay with her taking a trip with them (who knows and idc to speculate really) then it's not fair for her to ask him not to.
Besides, this is like, a small step removed from a who was that girl on the phone?
Your sister? You're going to go see your family for Christmas and she'll be there?? OMG that's not okay, SHE'S a GIRL!
Like, I could see her point if they had a long and storied past or she has ever been given reason to worry about them but it doesn't seem like it? It seems more like she's doing whatever she wants with whoever as long as it's not in a capacity that would make HER worry and it's arbitrary. I'ma go to the club or gym and fuck this dude is totally cool because I can make an excuse and it will sound reasonable but a platonic road trip between friends is nude to justify so I can't let him do that because I wouldn't be able to find a good excuse energy. I mean again, though, she's PROBABLY just insecure?
To me, seems like couples counseling should happen. But either way. My main point is you can't demand someone respect your feelings or the feelings of others if those feelings consist entirely of not respecting THEIR feelings that they works enjoy this trip with someone who is just a friend.
You have to ask yourself what would have made you snap out of it at 20, 22 etc. probably nothing. People change when they want to – often once they’ve hit rock bottom, whatever form that takes.
As we grow up we sometimes move on, we outgrow or grow apart from our friends. This happens a lot from 18-25 and then 25-30. Different ages means different stages of life and not everyone transitions. It’s not your fault.
Having someone do diddly squat and try to coach you would be annoying af.
Congratulations on moving on with your life – it’s not easy. Especially not when you feel you are a bit “behind”. In 5 years time you will be in an unrecognisable place and things will only get better for you. But you can’t help people who don’t want to be helped.
Can’t you just go? You don’t need his permission, do you?
What if you two drank coffee on the porch and talked there? He can think you are up to no good on your porch/balcony/patio. If you have one of those.
He could be on the autism spectrum and not know it. Everyone has this stereotype on how autism presents, but it presents differently for people. He may have a hot time picking up on social cues.