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Date: November 1, 2022
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But if she REALLY hates him, she would just break up with him. (Depending on circumstances). But she hasn’t. She just sees all of you guys on the side. That should be an indicator that maybe she’s just wanting to have some fun while still being in her relationship. Perhaps she’s telling people that she hates him so she doesn’t look so bad while constantly cheating. Also, are you hoping that if you tell him, he’ll break up with her leaving an opening for you to swoop in and…. Be the next guy she cheats on?
Exactly.
I lived in Europe and never had an issue.
Now somewhere in a small town in Canada and I wouldn‘t even walk on the streets during the day as a grown woman.
It‘s pretty bad.
As a man, no. They don't work. 90 percent of girls look for the top 5 percent of men. I'm 6'6 so it works for me, but I still choose to meet people in real world situations.
Met my current girlfriend rock climbing. I was a single dad, didn't change her attraction. As a man your sexual value peaks at 50, for women it's 18. Men are the hottest when they have a business, women when they are young. Gold diggers are just good women. Leonardo DiCaprio only dates women in their 20's for a reason. They date him for a reason.
If your a man, you got time on your side.
It made sense to me.
“I'm super insecure so I wrote these words.”
yes, you are much more likely to meet decent people and make decent connections with people outside of bars/clubs; nothing wrong with that.
Fuck. I don’t know anything about your relationship with your ex, but his mother is a big enough ?to make me think that being broken up with him is the right level of relationship to have with him/them.
That lady is nuts.
My ex gave me that ultimatum, it opened a new world of explosive orgasms. Nothing gay about your woman playing with your ass. If done right it feels amazing!
no reason to know why
just move on
Remember in the episode of Friends when Rachel needed $100 to go skiing (shoop shoop shoop)? And the friends put $100 in a card, and Monica says, “Here's your mail.” Rachel says, “thanks ill read it later.” Monica says, “NO, hears. Your. Mail.” Rachel says. “thanks, I'll, read. It. Later.” And then Monica hits her with it and says, “JUST READ IT!” Maybe try that.
That alone is why I WFH. The commute itself was enough to tear my hair out. Also, there's no “pretending to be working” when you got downtime like you have to do in an office. You can just chill. And you can work in PJs! Pretty sure his gf wouldn't mind working bra-less every now and then.
Plus I found pooping at work to be extremely stressful. Dude is able to have stress-free poops without waiting for a free stall or worrying about stinking the joint up.
quit being a cheap sob and help your partner out.
Yeah he sounds like he may have no social skills. Why give yourself the headache of dealing with it? You're not his mother or father. It's just been a month. Move on.
tell her you'll forgive her if you get a threesome with that colleague
bet it will make you very hot af
Also, she 'randomly' showed up on a day that girlfriend is normally out of town.
I would buy a random Saturday or Sunday drop by. I'm but not a work day drop by.
Your wife is childish, and frankly, I wouldn’t support this at all. She can have good boundaries at home and take care of your children but that is their grandmother and your mother.
I have to be honest. You blew it. Hes over it. You cant change his mind after so many negative encounters and reactions from your end. Maybe later youll connect again. But for now i suggest you let him go and take this as a learning opportunity and improve yourself for the future. If you go back now youll most likely repeat your shortcomings. You need to actively work to better yourself and how you respond and communicate. He needs space from you and the issues you two have.
I spent my twenties traveling the world. I became a mom a few years before I turned 40. But my sister did it the other way. Her kids are going off to college (while my kids are in grade school) and her and her husband are now starting to travel and enjoy life. I think you can do it either way.
Talk to a lawyer to find out about child support, then kick his cheating ass out. This is unsalvageable. Your baby will be better off growing up without this poor example of a partner.
“Take it”? Take what? Being scrutinized all the time for shit I didn’t do? Fuck no dude
I think you two are incompatible tbh.
Some, really could give two craps about civic holidays (myself included)… however, because of the importance of it to my GF, I step up and make effort knowing it will produce positive outcomes. If it makes her happy, then it's worth it to me.
If he doesn't see that side of it, likely the rest of your relationship will have negative experiences.
Sounds like he will be someone who doesn't care about putting in effort and seeing your side of things. Celebrating a day is a simple task to do and should always be taken into account.
Got me a copy. This is literally the text version of “your argument is invalid. Here is a bunny with a pancake on its head”.
I’d suggest he’s not being totally honest. Communication is an important part of a relationship and sex. He might not have major issues but he might feel insecure.
As a male, the only time I’ve had issues is after too much alcohol or if I have performance anxiety, and performance anxiety is something I get on the first time when I don’t know the person and what they’re into, but it really depends how the date went and other factors.
I’m sure everyone is affected differently but if I’m super stressed or have a lot on my mind, I can get very hot but the erection isn’t as strong.
It might also be worth knowing if your boyfriend is masturbating the same days you have sex, that could be a factor.
Hope you kicked him out the very moment he opened his mouth!
Godamn OP is getting destroyed
If the only thing that is of value in a woman partner is her youth, then sure what you’re saying is true, and there are men who believe that and women who have internalized that limiting attitude as well. So you do find men dating younger women due to only valuing youth in women. But women are all different and many make amazing partners regardless of age, just ask their partners. But the idea of youth being important for women is so pervasive, I get why it bothers you. So to help counter that, look into body positivity, it’s often used to counter fatphobia but it also is very useful to counter agism as well. Your value is NOT your youth, is not your body, but your whole self, and anyone who treats you differently (even yourself) needs a stern talking to.
It has always been a problem. And most solutions are toxic. Chivalry is dead because princesses killed it.
Now he maybe depressive or work his ass 80 hours per week.
Girls that mocked and friendzoned boys tend to suddenly become flirty when they get money. And most men ressent it like golddigging. If women are there for money, you d rather hire professional escorts, it is clear and there is no drama or manipulation.
It’s still unhealthy though
he believes a man shouldn't wear a condom in a marriage
on previous post 13 days ago
he insists he used the missing condoms to masturbate into
Please tell me you see how much fucking nonsense that is?!?!
I agree with you completely. But I don’t think I want the perfect fairytale, I just want some more romantic stuff like flowers on a random occasion or an initiation to go on a date of his choosing where he planned out the event or sending me those lovey memes with a cute message like “I miss you” or “thinking of you”, I just want to feel like he thinks of me. I know he loves me, he proves that to me every day, but I just wish there was more initiation for romance on his part.
Set boundaries which includes that you get to know the other lady,
You already have a child. So my question is, why do you want another? (Meaning him) and it’s not a sarcastic question it’s no maybe help you think about what’s best for you and your child (the one you gave birth to). If he broke into your home the last time you broke up, what’s to stop him from doing worse if you continue to stay? I’m concerned for your child and you. Keep me posted please.
It seems people here have failed to online in real life. Being in a situation like you described does lead people to cheating.
Should she have left him instead? Of course, but not all people are strong enough to do so, especially since she probably had lowered self-confidence, because of her marriage. If people always were able to do what is right, we would have a much better world, but that is not reality, regardless of the high horse all people here seems to ride on.
I don't think it is morality choice you are making her. Staying friends with her does not make you any worse as a person. However, you should consider if you are willing to sabotage your marriage for this friend.
Is it common for your wife to make demands like this?
You literally just get over it and stop caring. It’s in the past, it has no impact on your relationship. The porn and looking at other girls is something you can talk through with him.
Okay, here's the thing about that. This DOES have to do with you. Your response tells her what you're willing to accept. You're showing that you accept cheating, even if you say you wouldn't, because you literally did with her. Do you understand how that might make her feel very uncomfortable?
If not, let's put it this way. Let's say your wife has a male friend who cheated on his wife. You felt uncomfortable and told her as much. She responded with “I don't agree with cheating, BUT his wife was not meeting his needs and he felt lonely and unsatisfied, so it's okay.” Would you accept that answer?
Yeah you messed up by projecting your insecurities and he messed up by throwing away a 17 year long friendship over a 1 month relationship.
Info: why did you suggest a hook up and not ask her on a date?
He's too burned out to go to therapy.
This is a problem. He sounds like he's depressed at the very least, potentially something much bigger. Meds and a therapist will help him.
But you need to decide if this is how you want to live. If nothing changes, nothing will change. It's a constant cycle, and it's been going on since 2019.
If it were me, I'd end it and take some time to focus on myself. Respond and let him know that you are frustrated and can't keep living this way. You said you have licensing exams coming up, focus on those and then start dating. (new people, not him)
Because if he got to know her he could explore if she would even ever be open to NSA? Many women simply arent into the idea of FWB at all, and if she isn't, then he would know not to ask.
I think you might have misread a few portions of his post. He did apologize for English not being his first language.
His girlfriend is upset because he told her that he was sexually active prior to meeting her. He also said at the end that he has been taking things slow with her and not rushing sex.
I think it can work but his girlfriend will have to understand that people have sex. Maybe it is a moral issue for her, or she is worried about how she will be perceived by others? Or that she will just be another “notch in his belt”.
This is a good time to work through it and practice building those communication skills however, make sure we don’t allow ourselves to walk into a controlling and mentally abusing relationship from the start, so make sure to know when to draw the line in the sand and keep it moving.
Get a “band” to sit with the current ring that’s what we did’
I’ve stayed and worked through everything with him.
Why?
I have always catered to him on hands and knees basically even through the cheating and break ups. I’ve literally given him the world.
Why?
He says I don’t do enough and I’m not pulling my own weight,
He’s destroyed your self-esteem and is using you. You will never make him feel appreciated because he doesn’t want that from you.
Dump him and find someone worth your attention.
Unless you want the rest of your life to be like this, just dump him. You communicated clearly. He chose to ignore you. Not even to ignore you but to actively do things to sabotage your special day. Have a boundary in future relationships – if you are not made to feel special and cherished by your boyfriend (assuming you’ve been exclusive for 3 plus months) on your birthday and at Christmas then automatic dump. You do not need someone that nasty and selfish in your life.