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sexybrithany ……….
Date: October 11, 2022
AmateurPub
AmateurPub
sexybrithany ……….
He should have informed me prior to surprising me with tickets that he was expecting a date of equal or greater value within a specific time frame 🙂
Don't overthink it perhaps you're better off revealing it after you shower before bed and on a night where he isn't likely to feel tired
How old is the nephew? This is really a bad red flag. Why would their parents give him up? I would immediately talk to him. Does he just want alone time with a child? I know it shitty to think….but I can't think of another reason he would want to take him away from his parents to stay with you guys.
If you are willing to go nuclear, you can try this: tell her, since her health is so bad that she can’t even live in her room anymore, it’s irresponsible to keep her in your house. What, if something happens while you are at work? She should be in an institution with professional care. You gladly pay for it. Also: since she is in such a terrible shape, a car doesn’t make sense for her. You are going to sell it. That way she even has some more money every month, cause she doesn’t need to pay it off any longer. Due to her history with heart problems you don’t feel comfortable to give her normal food or even order something. Way too dangerous. You will buy special diet meals for her.
No, you're not in the wrong, and she doesn't seem to care too much about you. Do with that what you will.
Have you asked her what she wants to know? Some people don't want or need “full disclosure ” , others do.
Now that you are “official” tell her that comes with upgraded privileges like having a drawer at your place and asking deeper questions about your past. See what she is ready to exercise among those new rights and be prepared to answer honestly.
He also “saved her” from her stripper job. The strip club that he frequented in his late 30s looking for young girls to prey on I suppose.
Thanks for your comment. I've seen similar stories and my remarks were the same… but when this has happened so close to home… it's given me the chance to look at things from a perspective I would have never considered. I will leave it at that for now.
It’s naked to answer because he hasn’t acted like this since we first started seeing each other two years ago. He doesn’t act like this. But back then, he was worse than this. I don’t know.
She was grieving over her AP , reality check. She spend money on him and even sat down and spend time to write for him, she ain't over things. I'd be doubting if what she said was the whole story. And taking in a cheater, after she admitted ?
I won’t give advice, but I will give my experience with this exact situation. I was dating a guy at one point, he was honest and told me that someone from his past wanted to meet for lunch, and that she previously had a crush on him when they were in school together. He said that to him, it was just as friends to catch up, but he wanted to be honest with me about her previous feelings so that’s why he told me. When I asked him about his lunch with the friend that day he conveniently said he completely forgot about his plans with her and didn’t end up going (part of me doubts this because we went from texting constantly to radio silence for about the length of a lunch). We get into a relationship afterwards, it seemed to not be an issue. Fast forward a little over a month later and I get broken up with, and a week and a half after that, he is dating her. In my mind he was stringing both of us along and just wanted to see who would/wouldn’t work. Good luck with your decision on this OP, I hope it turns out better for you and he’s being honest.
This seems like a contrary take, but it's not. It's just some semi-relevant other perspective.
An acquaintance I respect (for his vast life experience) once told me (he was talking about when he was married) that if you hurt a woman they can forgive you, but the wound will never heal.
I'm not saying you should forgive or even forget. It's super sad to read your words, the feelings are really coming through. All I'm saying is, if you could find a way to understand him in being in a whole nother world/bubble, maybe he didn't want to get a refill for you, maybe he was enjoying the movie and didn't want to be interrupted, maybe some other thing was bothering him, and maybe the falling felt super humiliating for him, and maybe he was super hurt by you (even though it was imagined) laughing at him (again – even though it was only in his head), then you should do so. Otherwise, obviously, you can't.
I'm not giving him excuses. I'm not saying that the line he crossed was OK – it wasn't. But it ultimately boils down to if you think this is anything that is forgivable or acceptable at all, in any circumstance. Let's say that all of those things were true, would it be acceptable?
If it isn't, then you have no path forward and there is nothing to reconciliate.
I don’t, I’ve never it’s the first time. I was pissed af because of something she did. I don’t even remember anymore to be honest, but it did get my feelings really badly at the time. It was something I had repeatedly told her was hurting my feelings and she kept doing it. That’s why I did it
Your love and protection will be the cure. How terribly upsetting.
Are you even listening to him?
Slow down, stop overthinking, read what he responded and believe that.
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For back story, my husband (29m) and I (26f) live a couple doors down from my best friend (21f). We are all very close as she is over at our house all of the time. There is no strain between any of us. My husband and I have been together nearly 6 years and married for 1 year.
But we just had a small Christmas gift exchange at my house between my husband, myself, my best friend, and one other mutual friend. We were exchanging gifts and having a great time just hanging out together. My husband and I had quickly wrapped gifts before our friends arrived. He had told me in advance what he had gotten for my best friend and I had seen the things he selected – just a few things from her wish list. No biggie. He had all of her things in one box that I watched him tape up and wrap.
But when my best friend opened my husbands gift, she found the things he had told/shown me as well as sex toys. He had bought her a small vibrator and a wand. He didn’t mention that he got her these gifts at all. I was completely blind sighted. Obviously, we all laughed and she was appreciative as she is recently single. But after everyone left for the night, I felt a little perturbed.
I asked my husband why he gave her sex toys. He stated he overheard us talking recently about how her sex life is lacking since she’s single now. I don’t recall having that conversation with her recently, but I may have just forgotten. He said he was just trying to help. I then asked why he neglected to tell me he got her sex toys. He said he felt uncomfortable about it because he wasn’t sure if it was inappropriate or not. I asked so why did you give them to her anyways? I feel like you had plenty of time to ask me if it was inappropriate it or not. I told him that I felt like he crossed a boundary and he profusely apologized to me. He also asked if I would like him to apologize directly to my best friend. He said he didn’t do it to hurt me and that he didn’t think about how I might react to it.
I’m just not really sure how to feel about any of this. I trust both my husband and best friend entirely. I know there’s nothing between them. But I can’t help but feel a little betrayed. I just felt like it was such a creepy intimate gift to give to someone who is not your wife directly in front of your actual wife. I am at a loss and feeling so weird about it. Do I have him apologize to her? Or would that make thing worse? Do I bring it up to her directly and see if it made her uncomfortable? Do I just let it go and forget about it? What do I do? I’m just feel so strangely about the whole thing.
TLDR: My husband gave my best friend some sex toys for Christmas that he didn’t tell me about. I feel like he crossed boundaries and am not sure how to move forward.
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I literally said he should have a conversation, so we aren't disagreeing on that. What I said is that OP should stop subverting the topic to “I am saying this for you and your health”, while that is not true. Because this only leads to her thinking “I don't find this important, so thanks for trying to help, but no”.
He has said multiple times he finds fitness important and wants someone that he can talk with about that. He should lead the conversation with that. Because then she can't say it isn't important (without being an unreasonable partner at least), as the focus is now on what OP finds important instead of her.
So, he wants to impregnate you against your will. This is called rape in many countries.
This guy doesn't give a fuck about you your future and your plans. He just wants you as an incubator.
If this is the relationship you want, just keep doing what you're doing. If you have other plans, get out as soon as possible.b
Yeah, it’s tough because I legitimately wasn’t asking for exclusivity, but I understand completely why she interpreted it as me doing so. I wish she had said slow down instead, but I dunno. Kicking my own ass real naked for this one to be honest.
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I never said you weren't. I just recommend moving on, which you haven't. You might be talking to other men but this guy has a hold on you, which is why you're making a Reddit post on how to get his attention again.
Is it dead or just hasn't sparked off yet..? Some women don't hit a sexual awakening until later in life… right?
You don't get to decide that. You don't own the boy, and you can't use him to vet his father's GFs.
I'm sure you're going to do it anyway since there are no consequences.
She isn’t at a point of turning around though, nowhere near it she is growing a baby. The idea that right now she should be making it up to him when she is currently still going through it is ignorant of all the ways pregnancy can mess with a persons hormones and brain function. And if he was going through similar physical and hormonal problems and his wife was posting here insensitive to the stuff he was going through I would say the same thing. When your partner is going through it you just gotta get through it with them sometimes. Then work together afterwards to repair and bridge the gaps and communicate about all of it. When you’re in it for the long haul that’s what you do in situations like this. And you don’t get super dramatic about it during the situation because that doesn’t help anyone, honestly. It alienates the person receiving the dramatic reactions and riles up the person being dramatic about a temporary situation.
The long distance was mostly failing because of me not being able to deal with the separation (mostly the whole year apart during covid since borders got closed down), so the issues we are having now, I did not expect them. We also saw each others a lot, at least before covid, and things were good.
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Your reactions reinforce the theory tbh.
You seem defensive and not at all self-aware.
Wait, he buys you gifts but refuses to talk about what happened?
Yeah she sounds mentally unhealthy
Unsure about the methods to go about this. But the overall point of it, is not immature.
You made your reletionship goals clear, this is the direction I want our reletionship to head.
Its one thing for him to not be ready for it, but it's another to be off his radar completely. (Although, at his age, these should also be his own goals if it's what he wants for himself).
He should at very least be capable of discussing an appropriate timeline for these things, like it should be an open conversation.
Engagements do not need to be a surprise. Two people can plan out a date that works for them and go shopping together for a ring. Totally applicable method to take. Doing it together can be just as exciting as a surprise engagement.
Don’t do this. This isn’t a solution. She is cementing the relationship with a. Coworker and preparing to cut ties with you and in the mean time she’s fixing things in her favour before she leaves.
A solution is not a “break” it’s counselling.
Either his is a troll post, which is in bad taste, or you’ve been manipulated into thinking this is a good idea.
There is no circumstances where a “break” is a good idea. Breaks are designed for the manipulating party to basically see if things will work out for their new romantic partner or for them to break up with you gradually.
A break is not respectful to you, it’s wasting your time and prolonging your pain.
If someone wants to be in a relationship they don’t see other people to work out if they want to be with you, they work out the relationship using counselling or trying harder in their relationship.
This type of thing makes me so angry and op is just burying his head in the sand.
This is hilarious and a really good idea at the same time
Time to lay in the bed you made.
I'm not going to read over 250 comments, so here's my two cents, sorry if they're repetition:
Have her head checked, both ways. Regardless of intention, she's gaslighting you – falsifying reality which can destabilize someone emotionally and undermine their sanity.
Literally, the woman could have a tumour. Or she could have some severe issues around her child and her mother-role that could end up screwing up the kid.
While folks are talking about this as a good parenting and instructing move on her part – they're ignoring the gas lighting or making assumptions justifications – as if such a heinous thing is truly justifiable.
Good luck OP.
Non compatible. You need to end it. Your very undemanding needs are not being met. Not her fault, not yours either. Just incompatible?♀️?♀️
OP, I’m very sorry you are in this space right now. I can’t imagine how naked it is for you. I really want to applaud you for being kind and mature, a lot of of the people would just start hating on the neighbor. You see the whole picture here.
I understand what it’s like to go through infertility. Other people just suggest adoption or IVF, these are easy to say things and tough real life decisions.
I urge you to speak with him before fear and maybe resentment grow. I would phrase this from your insecurity of your infertility journey, and explain it almost just like you did on here: 1) you struggle with your this 2) your neighbor is newly widowed and while you praise him for being a helping hand to her, it does make you feel concerned.
If he is wonderful and thoughtful and you come at this from a non-accusatory stance, he will understand. Maybe this situation would be better for you and your family if you move, set distance, etc. it’s not about letting another person down, but sometimes you need to protect your heart and bubble.
Please keep us posted OP. I am wishing you the absolute best.
Thank you, Unfortunately, he put survallience in my house when I had my baby and heard my mom talking to me (she is a parralegal) and she told me I need to go to court and get child support from this man (he makes over 200K) per year..wayyy more than me. I hate court, I was scared. He got a lawyer and so did I and I was brainwashed during that time so I agreed to 50/50 because he didn't want to pay child support…however, I get our daughter most of the time and he only gets her 1 night per week to sleep over so I basically do that so I get her more, and he's fine with it since he doesn't have to pay support for her. Sad
I'm sad for the baby and it's not even born yet. I can already see them accumulating so much trauma from these two (not sure if they'll deserve to be called parents, the jury's out, so far they're immature 30 year olds)
I'm going to echo what other people have said and say that you should break up with her and try to get custody if she goes ahead with the pregnancy.
As you say, you'll be doing it all anyway, so you may as well do it with only one dependent rather than two
I was thinking this too but it’s not just about the fear of getting pregnant. Just reading this post was exhausting. What the guy did was wrong and there’s major red flags that she’s ignoring, but she needs to talk to someone to figure out why? Why would you rather stay with this clown who doesn’t respect you than be single? The tone of the post was extremely needy.
Yeah I assumed there was a past and curious how this “friendship” began.
I would do that too. “Dude, you know damn well you are here 20 minutes late everyday…” people blow my mind.
Ooo that’s some propa good advise, I’ll defo take some of that on board ? I met him for the first time a month ago and we clicked really well and he’s hinted at other dates, but nothings really come of it? (I’ve only met him once irl) I initiated the first time so I’m hesitant to do it again ?
Not so much planning a wedding but I’d love to shag the bloke hahaha
Blocking is the most effective. It’s honesty nothing personal.
Just tell him like it is.
Hey sorry, since our relationship ended, I have been doing some thinking. I originally had a desire to date, and since that stopped, I don’t have a desire to be friends. And I am not open to rebuilding a romantic relationship with you.
So, I think it’s best to go our separate ways.
I am only saying this so you’re not confused as to why I am going no contact. It’s nothing personal, this just isnt for me.
Take care, wish you the best of luck in life.
And then you remove and block. Don’t wait for response
Thank you for your comment, I truly appreciate you taking the time. Fortunately I still have one decent sister and when our other siblings go off on their bullshit our motto is ‘these people are real’
Make her do a prenatal DNA test now!
You made a dumb joke and got a dumb response. Tell him straight faced that you dislike the mustache experiment and you want him to shave it off and either regrow the beard or stay clean shaven.
The only ones I can think of offhand would be Steve Harvey and Sam Elliott. Tom Selleck's didn't seem odd at the time, but I'm a dude so I don't really know.
We also have an open relationship (one-sided in his favor only),
Why? Why are you still with him?
Guys just don't go the extra mile to constantly put themselves places where their friends are. If a friend of mine was going to a Syria lecture that I don't have a specific reason to be at, I'd say “uh ok, have fun with that”. I wouldn't sign up for it just for more time with my friend.
That is often what guys do when trying to date or hook up with a girl though.
That’s a lot of words to say you’re biphobic.
Yeah this guy is delusional. Oh well can’t wait for that next post ?
More posts to come from u OP !
This!!! Also, lots of CIS girls dont like wearing makeup either. Not sure why mom is making cosmetics her hill to die on. Sounds like what above poster is saying, that mom is not really as accepting as she wants you to believe.
Oh I just realized you said live affairs. He does. But like I said, my H is that good. And he wasn’t always like this. That’s why I’ve had such a hot time processing. I just knew the man I was married to was as committed to our marriage as me. I also carry the weight of my own choices— I had PPD after our youngest was born and medicated with alcohol. I had an on again off again binge drinking problem for a few years. I would go days, weeks, months, years without drinking at all but every time it came back I was a little worse. I never cheated or even put myself in a compromising position, I only drank at home but it did make me a pretty shitty partner at times. He stuck with me through my BS. Eventually I saw what I was doing to him and hated it. I didn’t want to put him through it anymore so I voluntarily went to rehab and haven’t drank since. I think he had a lot of disappointment and resentment and didn’t have the emotional skills to deal with it. I’ve had a lot of empathy for him, far more than he’s had for me, and I wasn’t willing to give up on him as long as I was catching glimpses of the man I knew him to be. But those have gotten fewer and further between with time. It’s like every time they’d come out he’d double down against them. I think he coped with his shame at being caught not being who he believed he should be by continuing the behavior. At this point though, he’s carried it on for so long, I think he’s forgotten any other way to be.
This advice may hurt, but unless you are able to get into a position financially where you are very flexible to travel often and/or provide enough security for her to conveniently move to the US or your new home in Canada, I would say this is a long shot. Definitely do not move to another country mainly because you are hoping to win over your highschool crush's heart. Plenty of other amazing women out there that are just as worthy of your affection
Ooo I like that
I never date people who are still in contact with their ex. Two of my ex’s cheated with their exes on my and they weren’t even friends.
Most men I dated wouldn’t accept it if I were still in contact with an ex and made that perfectly clear.
I think a lot of people have this boundary. I think it’s good that she’s telling you upfront because if you’re not on the same page you’d rather know now and move on.
Sometimes you need to do things that you don't want to do because it's important to someone else, especially if you care about that someone else. Not everyone sees the value in sacrifice and not everyone would view it as a sacrifice. There are some, unfortunately rare, who would want to be there for you.
Do you feel like you frequently do things that you don't want to do just to make your husband happy? Do you feel like you make sacrifices? Does he complain about everything? What is the rest of the relationship like? Does he put you down about other things?
I can relate about not having a supportive or caring partner. I discovered when I focused more on myself and less on them the relationship just naturally dissolved as they found someone else to feed them.
In stead of talking to strangers about it on the internet, have you considered bringing these concerns to him. If you can’t do that, it’s time to walk a way and learn how to have uncomfortable conversations
I'm really sorry, but she's not the one for you. She's really upset about something that: 1 – you can't change, 2 – is in the past, 3 – shouldn't matter because you are committed. This is something that even if she tries to get over it because she really wants to be with you, will haunt your relationship and tear her up inside constantly. Every time you say you like something, or want to “try” something, she will be thinking about whether you already did, or how you know. If she gets a symptom of an STD or you may have a symptom (that is really something else), she will question that.
It's not a good fit and you will have lots of fights and pain over it. Both of you. So yeah, I'm sorry to say she's not right for you or you for her.
They were! She flipped the scrip on me. The agreement was she keep her last name and the kids would have mine with her’s as the middle.. Now she is saying she never said that.. I know what I heard. I never would have had unprotected sex with her if I knew she was going to do this with the kid’s name.
Christ, it's M3gan.
Did you read my post?