Your Tahoe/Suburban argument made me think of something my wife and I will have an issue with occasionally. She finds it necessary to correct me, often in front of others about silly things, usually numbers. For instance, we were talking to a realtor about selling our house and the subject of in general terms how much we owed on the mortgage. I said “about $100,000” she replied “no, it’s $99,700.” So I said “well that’s about $100,000 isn’t it?” Even the realtor agreed under his breath. She didn’t. She does this a lot about a great many things. She never will wait and tell me privately, she just blurts it out. For someone like me who was raised solely by an overbearing mother, this is a major trigger.
However, while it’s a character flaw I don’t appreciate, she’s overall a wonderful person and my best friend in addition to the love of my life. You two may still love each other but you’ve moved away from being friends. Ask yourself, if you weren’t married, would you hang out with him as a friend? Vice versa? Maybe counseling can help you find that friendship you once had. Maybe you both can change your attitude? Nobody likes being corrected all the time, especially when it’s not a big deal. Nobody but a few like to be controlled by their partner. The amount of respect given is the amount earned by each of you. If you just look at it as a “him problem” you’re probably doomed, same if he looks at it as a “her problem” both of you have to be willing to change or you might as well end things.
you should join r/loveafterporn
Your Tahoe/Suburban argument made me think of something my wife and I will have an issue with occasionally. She finds it necessary to correct me, often in front of others about silly things, usually numbers. For instance, we were talking to a realtor about selling our house and the subject of in general terms how much we owed on the mortgage. I said “about $100,000” she replied “no, it’s $99,700.” So I said “well that’s about $100,000 isn’t it?” Even the realtor agreed under his breath. She didn’t. She does this a lot about a great many things. She never will wait and tell me privately, she just blurts it out. For someone like me who was raised solely by an overbearing mother, this is a major trigger.
However, while it’s a character flaw I don’t appreciate, she’s overall a wonderful person and my best friend in addition to the love of my life. You two may still love each other but you’ve moved away from being friends. Ask yourself, if you weren’t married, would you hang out with him as a friend? Vice versa? Maybe counseling can help you find that friendship you once had. Maybe you both can change your attitude? Nobody likes being corrected all the time, especially when it’s not a big deal. Nobody but a few like to be controlled by their partner. The amount of respect given is the amount earned by each of you. If you just look at it as a “him problem” you’re probably doomed, same if he looks at it as a “her problem” both of you have to be willing to change or you might as well end things.
Or take it to his grave.
Is there anything i can do now to try and save it or make him in love again?