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MULTI SQUIRT SHOW [591 tokens remaining]
Date: October 22, 2022
AmateurPub
AmateurPub
MULTI SQUIRT SHOW [591 tokens remaining]
I don’t want to get too personal here but what does your therapist say when you tell them about this stuff? For background… I am old (lol) – have been in therapy on and off for like 25 years and went to marriage counseling. From my place of knowing zero and not knowing you… well… why is getting married so important to you? You have been together 8 years. Now, you’re have conflict and issues. Why do you feel like marriage is the answer? Why do you “want to crawl in a hole“ when people ask when you’re getting married? You have had an eight year partnership which is a marriage. There is a chance it has run its course. That’s a long time and people change a lot after eight years. Do you have kids together? My other 2 cents after many relationships and marriage is that the last person anyone wants to marry is the person who says they won’t go to counseling. I think every single married couple I know has gone to counseling together at some point? It’s the rare marriage that doesn’t hit bumps in the road. A marriage or union is two people rowing the boat together. It’s taking care of someone when they are sick or putting up with them when they go through a bad patch, lose their job, get depressed, whatever. Also you’re someone who really wants to improve yourself and works hot and goes to therapy and he’s the toad in the hole croaking about how how he won’t see any kind of therapist. Are you well-watched? Are you holding on for the sake of holding on? Is the engagement a Sword of Damocles hanging over both your heads and causing extra stress and pressure? Might it be time at the very least to call off the engagement and see if there is still a relationship here that works for the both of you? It sounds like he is going fuck all and you’re carrying the weight. I don’t hear marriage sounds like a great idea in what you posted. I hear at the very least this engagement is causing problems? What does your therapist say about you wanting to go forward with marrying this person?
Im in a separation right now. She and I agreed that we wouldn’t pursue any sex Or relationship while separated. If you talked about something and came to an agreement it would be considered cheating to me. But I mean just figure out if ya want to get back together and set your expectations
I thought y’all were dating…but I think you guys need to talk about what you guys are. If you keep supporting her the way you are and let you guys say “I love you” etc the line between being exclusive will blur. She also does need to see therapy especially if she wants to better herself. I say this as someone who was dealt with SA by a family member. But you really want to figure where you are placed. Like will you continue like this for two years? Five?
So I'm not going to tell you whether you should reach out to this girl or not.
But
This dude is crappy and manipulative. The fact that he has been a good friend of yours doesn't mean that you can't do better or don't deserve better.
Think about it. Do you have the same best friends that you did in primary school, or have you moved on to people who are a better fit with who you are today?
Assuming it's the latter, move on again and block this dude's number.
Yeah, I think maybe I’m really just afraid to be alone again.
i guess thats exactly what i need to hear right now, thank you
Time to learn a valuable lesson. 'No means no'..You don't tell someone to stop doing something and then just continue to allow it to happen. Here is what you say to him “since you cant seem to respect my wishes or my friends, its time we move on. Great knowing you and I wish the best for you in life but we are done with us being even remotely together”…there you go, you are welcome.
He may not even get the text
I mean nobody controls their dreams anyway (and it's positive that your gf isn't “obsessed with you”)
You think so?
I don’t have advice for you lemons, I just want to say you and your man seem like really reflective people who love each other deeply.
That kind of connection is so rare in this world. Like just this man’s ability to speak his truth to you in the title. Beautiful, I envy him for having the emotional intelligence to communicate like that after a fight. Especially one in which he felt disrespected.
I would like to add that if you’re feeling anxious he definitely is too; maybe his plans were the time he intended to emotionally prepare himself for the weekend/funeral and vent his own anxiety in a way that wouldn’t increase yours.
I've been in the exact same shoes. He might be on more than just alcohol lmao. Idk, I'm not the best with advice. Just have like specific days he goes out maybe? That way he can still spend some time with you and still hang out with the boys
if he got into a state she should of called you. i seriously bought hd was crying for that long in a park and she didn’t think oh i better answer tgat my boyfriend might be worried.
Your friend isn't your friend if she's crossing your boundaries like this. PERIOD. If your moral code is strong, then you'd tell her husband. Pretty sure your not her first attempted affair
Logically I know it’s not but sometimes it just comes crashing down.
Thanks, I think I’ve been in a bit of a panic mode all week and blow things out of proportion in my mind.
You are an absolutely garbage human being, completely lacking in empathy. She’s going though unimaginable bodily changes, and you’re only thinking about sex right now. Worry about the child you helped bring into the world. I hope she leaves you and finds a real man
You and your husband are very immature
If I saw your bf do that, I’d kick him down the stairs. Not only is it an animal, it’s a baby. You should read up on people who are violent to animals.
Disgusting.
No. You're all adults and everyone knows about your baby daddy. Go ahead and pursue your relationship.
Well, she liked you enough to flirt with you and go on a date. But she does not like you enough to take you seriously. She wants to tie you up, without giving anything to you.
Wants you on easy-mode.
When she saw you have fun with another co-worker, clearly that struck some jealousy. She expected you to be wrapped around her finger, which you shut down pretty well. Now she is flustered. Goes in for a long hug, gives you an easy complement, hoping that reel you back in.
What are you hoping to get out of this conversation if you mention it? A reconnection? A chance to date?
That's the thing really. I've had this conversation with them multiple times but they still feel the same way irregardless. I really pour my heart out about it but it has always been an issue.
I get that you feel bad, but you're not a bad person for going on dates with someone who is local. To me it feels like a non issue, a girl that you went on a handful of dates with before moving (tbh, it's wild to me that she agreed to come there after such a small amount of dates). If you want to see things through with the local girl, do it.
Because I want to trust him.
I think he might be having a performance problem as well. He’s not good in bed tbh and we talked about that too and he said “I know” he seemed like a little down about it. But I don’t want him to feel bad or insecure about those things bc I like him a lot and I don’t want to end a great relationship over sex. I’m willing to work on whatever with him. But I need some effort from his part
Like half an hour ago he was 35 and she was 26
Haha ta, I would have never got that :)))
Exactly.
This person seems to believe that the person who goes to a club looking to hook up with a guy, will just be a completely different person at other social outings. “Sure I look for attractive people to fuck at the club every weekend. But when I’m at a ball game I’d rather die then talk to an attractive person and hook up with them!”
Like what in the absolute fuck?
She needs to grow up.
You can't use mental health as a crutch forever.
If she doesn't grow up she'll just become a burden to everyone around you. It's up to you if you become one of those people.
I see
You act like people who grow up to be anything except well-adjusted and perfect people by young adulthood had bad parenting. A person can have perfect parenting and still come out to be a murderer.
Ewww…?
I just want to say thank you to everyone for your help. And after a while of thinking about this you all make sense. To be honest, I would've felt better about it if he did say it to me, to my face… if he were mad at me and trying to hurt me or just being a douche bag. But the fact that he was talking to his mother, completely unaware that I even heard this is… proof that this is how he really feels. I've been through hell with this man… through AA, dry out, therapy… you name it. I tried very hot to be that one person that believed that he could better himself… people do change. But, obviously he values none of it. Nor I. So the only thing to do is begin moving on.
How was he trying to be a good lover exactly? By not touching her and hoping his magic Wang would get the job done. The fact that he couldn't tell she hadn't had an orgasm at that age is insane.
No. I've said a few times that I have a crush on him and I like a lot of what I know about his personal life, but nah, I don't post about “if I were with him”.
That could have a lot to do with age though. My celeb crushes were a little crazier when I was a lot younger, but I don't spend a lot of time gushing about really any guys anymore.
YOu can't get them to stop spending megabucks on your presents, so don't even try? You've already asked them once and they didn't listen; there are no magic words from us to make them listen. Your wife has already said you can ask for gift receipts, and it's just your mindset that is holding you back from doing it. So change your mindset to “they are going to gift us lavish shit we don't want. They are not going to stop. It's OK to ask for gift receipts. So that is what we will do.” I always include gift receipts on my own children's presents; it isn't that heavy of an ask.
you're being abused. leave.
Do she knew both these guys wanted sex. She said no, but provided condoms “just incase”
Then proceeded to get high with them knowing their intent and providing them with condoms.
Now…. I don't want to seem too insensitive…
But you're post says “she them proceeded to have sex with them”
Im assuming they didn't “ask” again…. so both of them just started touching her and she got hot?
No, you are definitely NOT overreacting.
But you will be obligated to pay her bills the minute you DO marry her
I'm pretty sure that isn't the case in most jurasdictions globally.
Individual debts do not become marital debts, regardless of marriage.
Only jointly accrued debts that are jointly and severally liable would oblige the spouse to pay – or rather would mean they could be persued to pay.
He’s done. Time for you to acknowledge that and move on
Thanks for this. I am very well aware that teaching is a thankless and painful job and it has become much worse since COVID. We've discussed a career change or even just taking time off or some sort of leave.
One other layer of frustration for me is that we discuss things but nothing really happens after. It's either that or she'll complain about things but never do anything to solve the problem. Just chronic complaining.
I think now that I have a clear sense that none of this normal I'll be more confident in directly approaching this and actively pushing for steps such as counseling.
Thank you again for your note.
This post has reached one of our comment/karma limits. The text of the post has been preserved below.
I absolutely love being a gamer and disappearing into fictional worlds and solving problems using creativity.
I am considering buying Hogwarts Legacy when it is released in February, but a friend of mine has literally said that if I buy the game she will stop being my friend and she will tell everybody that I do not support LGBTQ rights.
I'm a cis-gendered bisexual woman of colour & most of my close friends are part of the LGBTQ community. I also have a lot of trans friends who I love & I 100% have their back. I acknowledge fully that JK Rowling is a TERF I don't support her views at all.
I was born in the late 80s and so I grew up with the Harry Potter books/movies. I aged alongside the characters & it's hugely nostalgic for me. The gameplay footage looks amazing & I'm kinda excited to get it as a treat for myself for getting out of nearly 3 years of unemployment.
I mentioned it to a few friends & they have not taken it well. They've said if I buy the game or support it any way I am not actually an ally. They've since then shared a lot of e posts on facebook about how people who support the game support JKR's beliefs (I do not support them).
I just want to relive my childhood fantasy of attending Hogwarts, but the way my friend is reacting makes me feel really shitty about it.
Edit: this friend in question is not a trans person.
Edit 2: I will more than likely pirate or buy second hand after it's been out for a while.
You be too clingy he will get annoyed and leave.
Why do you say he’s the best guy when he told you that you look 12 and are ugly compared to his exs? He doesn’t sound like a good guy.
Don’t you have work, school, hobbies, interests or friends? Try to focus on that instead of just him. Grow as a person. Don’t manipulate others.
You are playing the martyr with posters because you cannot get your way in this, i.e., “I gave in”, poor me. I don’t appreciate it and if you take this attitude with your wife, she won’t either. She doesn’t deserve that. If you cannot find it within yourself to wholeheartedly go all in with your wife in anticipating, preparing for, raising, and celebrating a new life than do not do it. Especially don’t do it and expect people to feel sorry for you. You have a choice.
I can’t even get through your post. Stop calling women “females”. It’s gross.
You should probably seek therapy. I’ve never heard of someone calling the mother of their unborn child an ingrate before. That.. is astounding.
You should probably seek therapy. I’ve never heard of someone calling the mother of their unborn child an ingrate before. That.. is astounding.
You can try, but the timing is not great. She’s not going to want to be tied down in college with a high school relationship anyway.
You could ask her out, just for fun, maybe she will just for fun. But you will risk the friendship. Or you could play the very long game and try to stay friendly acquaintances until she has been in college for a few years and is available and looking for a relationship and then you reconnect. A person can dream.
Rarely has time to herself because of the kids Im either at work or if not it’s winter and she says she doesn’t want to bring the kids out for them to get sick, she doesn’t have friends after something that happened a while ago kinda stop trying to, every couple pay checks I pay for her nails so she can have some time to her self because I hate not being able to give her that time to be herself
She is enabling this couple and if she refuses to stop it I don’t see much you can do but break up. You can do the ultimatum of her friends or you but it seems like she already kinda trickle truths what happens and what they talk about. Personally I’d never be able to trust her at this point and if she never shown you the lingerie what happened to it? Did she throw it away? Personally I’d just cut my losses and move on.
Yea like i remember that post awhile back where another woman was saying about her husband not being the father and was 100 percent adamant she never cheated and it turned out she wasn’t the mother and the kid was switched, she was all out on proving she never cheated and yet this, it’s like she’s not even trying, plus the pattern is too similar to an accent that posted the same sorta thing yesterday with the OP being the same level of not answering the important question, I won’t be surprised if it comes up this post is fake.
Your body, your choice. If you want to abort, this is not open to negociation. Now, this means you are quite fertile and he is perhaps the one with fertility issue. So he should get tested and if needed, you could ask for a sperm donation.
Why are you still with him?
Wtf is the police gonna do
Your boyfriend needs to tell her, I’m in a relationship. You crossed a boundary and made my girlfriend uncomfortable. I think it would be best if you didn’t come to game night. Shut that down.
It’s ok to not invite people into your home that have crossed your boundaries. If I confessed my love to a man in a relationship, I wouldn’t expect his GF to welcome me into their home. That’s crazy.
i misspoke:) the word is not ideation more like he said something like a morbid metaphor. word hot
Yeah I totally understand that. I was just trying to provide the perspective of how his partner might see it. It’s not as big a deal to me to delete as it is to others. Ultimately, this is something they will have to compromise on or navigate through.
Women who do this are fucking scum.
Hii, thank you for the reply and the advice !! Can you elaborate on the last line??? I can’t seem to get the idea of what you want to convey clearly.
He’s mono, you’re poly. Break up with him before you hurt him. Unless you love him more than being poly, then you choose to be mono. Make a decision and stick to it.
There is no HR claim here, he sets his personal boundaries, HR fronts for the company not the employees,
I'm starting to feel so sad about this, what should I do?
Say respectfully I understand you want me to wear sexy clothes and such at various times and even times when im not feeling up to it, but that's not feasible all the time for me. However I will try my best to oblige when I can. Period.
Aw, hon. You’ve got two little babies and it’s actually pretty normal to not be in the mood for a while after having a baby. It’s your body’s biological way of trying to space out babies. But you’ve also got a 25 year old husband who loves you and wants intimacy. And I’m going to go out on a limb and assume that your husband is a good guy who wants affection, closeness, and a mutually enjoyable physical expression of love and not just you lying there waiting for him to be done.
So, the first thing you need to do is acknowledge that your husband needs more than apology nudes and occasional perfunctory sex. He needs to feel like you looooove him, want him, and want to be intimate with him. It’s hot when the babies are small and you’re touched out and you really do need a break. But girl, YOU deserve to feel like a fully human woman and not just someone’s mom. Sex is for you, too, not just to keep your man from leaving.
So. What kind of closeness would get you out of mama mode and into wife mode? A bubble bath? An at-home date night where you crank the tunes and make cookies together? Sitting on opposite sides of the couch giving each other foot rubs while watching Aliens?
Figure that out and do something fun twice a week. When you hop into bed, start with a back rub or something that feels good for you. Shift gears by hiding the laundry in the closet, lighting some candles, and taking time to get emotionally close. Remind yourself, this is your husband and your love, and you want that love to grow and be amazing long after the babies aren’t babies anymore. Good luck, girl. I’m rooting for you.
I was gonna say a lotta mean stuff about your girlfriend, but I'll say this instead, I guess the only thing you should ask yourself is, Do i want to spend the rest of my life with someone who thinks like this??
Well said
Mate, she doesnt need a doctor, she needs a psychologist. She could have PTSD, PPA, PPD, Psychosis or any combination from the pregnancy or birth. Getting laid should be so far down your list of concerns – this is your wife, the mother of your child.
Worst case, you do divorce – do you really want to be coparenting with someone who has obvious need for help for the next 18 years? Help her get some help, she might need to see a few different psychologists before she finds one who she is comfortable with.
Just because she looks like she hasnt got a kid doesnt mean she physically/mentally has 'healed' from birth, this shit takes time for many women.
Sounds like she knew you were going to break up with her and decided to trap you. But you can still break up, get custody as much as you can and take care of your child. You don't need to stay with someone you don't want to. I think if you stay together she will quit her job regardless of your wishes and expect you to support her and do everything.
Serious toxic waste of human flesh!
It's a matter of respecting his orientation. It sounds like he's been honest with you and that's really all you can ask for. If being around him makes this harder then you'll probably have to avoid him until you can get your emotions under control.
As a relationship therapist, I understand that trust and honesty are crucial components of a healthy relationship. The situation you have described can be confusing and hurtful, and it's understandable that you are feeling upset and questioning the future of your relationship.
From what you've shared, it seems like your girlfriend broke the agreement you had established in your friends with benefits arrangement by having sex with someone else before having sex with you. Additionally, she lied to you about the situation, which has likely contributed to your feelings of anger and mistrust.
In terms of your relationship, it's important to consider if you feel like you can trust your girlfriend moving forward. If you do not feel comfortable with the relationship as it is, it may be necessary to have an honest and open conversation about your concerns and the impact that this situation has had on your relationship.
It is also important to consider if you feel like you have the right to be mad. Your feelings are valid, and it is okay to express them to your girlfriend. However, it's also important to approach the conversation with an openness to understanding her perspective and to work towards finding a solution that works for both of you.
Ultimately, the decision to stay in the relationship or not is a personal one that you will have to make. However, I would encourage you to consider seeking therapy to work through any underlying issues and to ensure that the relationship you have moving forward is based on trust and honesty
It sounds like she is ghosting you and you should just let it go.
You want to know how to tell him? Send him a letter after you move out or through the lawyer you use to get the divorce.
Well, I'm sure in his mind it's because he can't see anything other than his straight male perspective. And according to that perspective, women are sex objects, and of course sexy things are going to happen when a bunch of sex objects have a sleepover.
Guys would never do that, as they are just guys, not sex objects. Makes perfect sense to him!
Holy mother of man child
I'm not sure what to believe anymore. He said he wanted a poly relationship so we could have a happy family together with multiple people. But his actions seem to say something else… I've wanted to leave him before, but because he did change and stopped doing the things that hurt me I decided to give him another chance.
That child still has plenty of time to aborted. Just weird to me that your only piece of advice to someone who I would say was raped is to “step up as a father”. Especially to someone who thought they were using all the measure’s possible during sex to prevent it when it actually turns out he was being manipulated.
Being a good parent would for sure not be my main focus or motivation. Main focus for me and OP would be how to either have baby momma abort or not have this baby tied to him.
You have no self respect and aren't happy in the relationship. Seems like you just don't want to have the feeling of being “lonely”. Also you have to grow a backbone. She's walking you like a dog on the leash. End it, don't fall for crocodile tears and move on
You're boyfriend made the first aggressive move, and persisted when told to step back. He even aggressively advanced, prompting the reaction he received.
The dynamics of self-defense do NOT dictate you 'raise your hands'. It's that you present an increasingly aggressive stance, to the point that you become a perceived threat. Which your bf did.
Insane takes like this are one reason trans acceptance is sliding backwards. You're absolutely fucked if you think this is an acceptable piece of information to keep from someone. You're taking away informed consent and it's regressive AF.
Don't go to France and ignore your children!!
Run. This will only get worse. Been there. Tell him good luck.
You’re both emotional children, IMO. She friendzoned you and lead you on, which is fucked up. But you have a possessive personality and you persisted even after she told you she only wanted to be friends. My guy, learn to read between the lines.
You’re both somewhat right, but you’re also both totally wrong.
He’s a 22 year old man, not a 2 year old child.
His choices have consequences. If he doesn’t wake up, he doesn’t. If he loses his job or can’t pay his bills, those consequences will teach him to grow up and learn how to wake up.
This is his problem entirely. I would not fix it or solve it or even deal with it.
Redditor moment.
You did the right thing. STAY STRONG.
They weren't together tho
Guess what I have close friends and I don’t give af if they see me hot because Im comfortable in myself, and I trust them not to find it sexual. Your personal experience does not dictate the rules for others.
Don't just drop a hi. Maybe remind her of who tf you are 😀
Yeah
You're welcome
Thank you, it’s extremely difficult to not feel guilty for wanting to leave. I have had my own share of mental health issues and she’s stuck around for those, but it’s been nothing as out of pocket as this. It just caught me so by surprise. I’ll try to stick it for a while, but I have communicated that I can’t stay forever if she doesn’t get help.
Thank you so much