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Date: November 6, 2022
AmateurPub
AmateurPub
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Her behaviour is really suspect.
Oh, that’s why I’m suggesting couples therapy, if she can’t get over this and stand up for herself, then OP should leave her. I’m just saying that this does seem fixable. Clearly she regrets listening, just hopefully she can grow a spine.
This might be a wild assumption to make, but have you ever looked up his name on Google to see if he’s a sex offender or not? The reason I say this is because maybe he doesn’t want children because he’s legally not allowed to be around them. He was 19 when you were 12 (and 22 with a 15 year old even if he didn’t know your age until 3 years later which is still strange bc that seems like an important thing to ask very early in the relationship lol) so yeah…
Tell him for you to move forward with him he will have to take a lie detector test since he has lied about everything so far. Tell him that if he has not disclosed anything do it now before the test. Odds are he will fess up at that point as he won’t want to take the test. But the lap dance is the least of your problem with him.
What happened at school to him? How did you respond? These are needed details to resolve the issue. It's important to get into his head and understand why he acted the way he did.
Sometimes partners grow in a way that is no longer compatible with the relationship. In those situations it’s best to end the relationship and move on.
If you really want to make it work then at a minimum you need to figure out what all beliefs he’s adopted. Like is he now a homophobe? Does he think women should be submissive? Does he believe women should have the right to bodily autonomy? If you two have kids does he expect to raise them as Christians? Would he expect you to stay home with kids? Does this impact the kind of marriage he wants? Like would he expect you to convert to Christianity to marry him? Would this impact your finances? Does his particular brand of Christianity require large contributions or tithes?
You need to figure out who he has become to decide if he is someone you can even be with anymore.