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Paul, 20 y.o.
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Date: November 16, 2022
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I go through this phase sometimes when I’m not feeling well myself. Or if I smoked too much weed- normally clocked out and don’t want sex. May be try a surprise date night.. do something spontaneous and date nights
You seriously have to call him out on the not brushing his teeth thing. That’s highly gross and probably why all that shit has been squirting out of his mouth onto you.
Ok there's quite a bit to unpack here, so I'll try to keep it as brief as possible. First thing, No I don't think that your behavior, per this example, is indictive of “a psycho”. Second, As you didn't explain what the fight was about, I'll assume it was over something trivial. With that said, it seems to me that actually your wife's reaction was the one that was way over the top. She seems rather needy (the hugging & cuddling and then wanting chocolate), as well as a little childish (the lady and the tramp thing). However, it is possible that her over the top reaction is actually the by-product of something else that is going on in y'alls lives; ergo, stress has manifested itself in an unusual way. Last, getting back to the whole “Am I a psycho” thing…. I'm not really understanding how you rewinding what y'all were watching and her exclaiming that you are unempathetic have to do with one another? (Actually I thought that was a thoughtful thing to do.) When she went crying and running out of the room, was she expecting you to follow her? And because you didn't, is that why perhaps she is calling you “unempathetic” and “psycho”? You didn't mention how old y'all were, but she seems immature.
I'm absolutely horrible at texting. I'll read a message, reply in my head, put my phone aside for hours, remember the text a few days later. I'm not making excuses for anything – just saying that new guy honestly might not be much of a texter. I have the same insecurity so I feel you ♥
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Yuck omfg that is horrendous, u deserve so much better.
I mean, yeah.
This is what having a very young child does. You either go to bed when they do, or you sleep in the guest room.
I get it. You need your you time. But having an 8 month old baby means there is drastically less time for everything you want. Is your gaming bigger than your relationship right now? A strong enough relationship can withstand that. But st the end of the day, your a dad first. What's important is if you want to be a partner second, or a gamer second.
Your you time is important. I won't deny that. But your fiancé has lost a lot of her personal time here as well. You guys need to have a sit down where you figure this all out.
I know it's only been eight months, but congrats. I love being a dad.
Title confused me, as being out of touch for 12, 24, 48, etc. hours isn’t a problem in and of itself. The problem is that he stood you up on the plans he made with you.
You know where he is. He’s at a friend’s, and he’s ignoring your calls/texts, bc he’s having more fun there, doesn’t want to come to your family Xmas, and doesn’t want to deal with what will (rightfully) be an earful from you. He’s either still having too much fun with his friends or could even be shitfaced drunk and passed out. Either way…He is 100% going to come up with some bulkshit he hopes will fix it…tomorrow. My bet would be on a crazy story, something that makes it totally not his fault and he may even be a hero for having (whatever) for his friend.
Don’t believe it. Whatever he says, he’s lying. He ditched you. And humiliated you. And he doesn’t care one bit.
The smart thing to do is send him a “we’re done” and then ignore (or block) his calls and texts. I know you think talking to him will give yoy “closure”, but it won’t. You have ALL the information you need.
Let her go. What’s done is done you can’t fix it. She deserves happiness. I hope you get help for your BPD. You need therapy and possibly meds. Please do the steps to get better so you can stop hurting other women. Don’t use your disorder as an excuse for bad behavior.
Oh my god, so many no no’s here. He is being an asshole about wanting you to move in with him. If he just wants you there, he doesn’t need to be charging you HALF of his mortgage for it to stay his place, and strongarming you into paying half his mortgage or he’ll dump you is more than just a red flag. You should leave him. Like definitely leave him. But come on, obviously you can’t be on the deed, you have barely even been together, plus I’ve decided you’re leaving him because he’s being awful.
Full stop.
I do feel her love and respect. I guess I am conflicted right now. After we confronted about this, I became the one who apologized the most because apparently, My reaction to her action was worse than her actions. I was trying to find a solution for both to work but it felt like the solution was the i admit i was wrong. So I'm having to re-evaluate everything
Showed this post post to my gf and we both think your bf is a gatekeeping tool who should be happy his SO wants to share his interests.
With respect, I don't think you know what it's like to be engaged in this kind of relationship.
People will twist situations and discussions in the direction they want them to go, and can be very successful at changing the subject.
If instead of a list she had a journal where she described the mean things her SIL did, would the husband have the right to read that and throw it away? Would you still be calling her a narcissist for writing it?
I think it's bizarre that you're judging OP for employing writing as a way of processing and remembering things that have happened to her.
What property of hers would you respect enough that if her husband not only examined it without her permission but also discarded it, you'd think that's serious?
I keep notes on arguments and conversations and doing so has made me realize that literally every time I question one person's behavior or express anxiety at how their behavior affects me, the subject changes to how I said it or what I'm doing that bothers them. Every time.
Do you think that's narcissistic too? Probably.
My therapist thinks it's a healthy way of processing and understanding patterns in that relationship. It's a safeguard against gaslighting, too.
Yes
OP, I can't imagine the situation in, but based on many comments from you and others here, I think your sister may also be a victim here. It seems pretty well known in your family/circle that your sister drinks too much/blacks out often and usually needs help she is so drunk. You've also mentioned that your husband holds his liquor well… if your sister was so drunk, she needed physical help to stand and get to the couch, and your husband was able to leave the house on his own, there's really only 1 conclusion to make here. Your husband raped your sister. Someone who needs physical help to move to a couch from the floor, under no circumstances, can consent properly or at all. You should speak with your sister asap and contact a lawyer even faster
Wishing you luck!
I assure you I am not 11 neither is she
If you really blacked out and don't remember anything, you need to address your drinking, and include that as a topic of conversation with your boyfriend if he agrees to communicate with you again.
Get the court to serve him. Walk away and get on with your life. Try Lc
You're young, and you have so much left to learn and do and be. Dont feel like you have to stay with someone who says hurtful things just because its been a long time investing in the relationship.
You're worth more than cruel “jokes” at your expense.
Nope, she is trying to downplay wrongdoing. I do think there are times people can come back from cheating, but this is not one of those times. Break up with her and move on.
Paternity test, therapy, support your wife, the kid is also 50% your wife, so focus on that. You can’t give up on your wife or the 50% that is your wife.
Sure a monster is part of it, but your wife is in there too, making the kid someone you can love. Also, its not the kids fault, its an entirely different person and is in no way responsible. You are saving the kid from the monster.
There is a reason she's hiding her phone. It could be something 'embarrassing' but I'l bet it's a conversation she doesn't want you to know about…
You using the term 'cancelling' to describe consequences tells me all I need to know.
Don't break up with your boyfriend becuase your brother decided to run his mouth and learned a lesson. He deserved to get his shit knocked about. Your brother owes you and your boyfriend a sincere apology.
And if you dump your boyfriend becuae your brother is a rasict douche nozzle. Then you are no better then him.
Plus, she works Sundays! This guy is being such a mooch and has the gall to call her ungrateful… pathetic.
Dude. Run.
The next year she finally found some housemates that she really got on with and finally made a tight friendship group. She lived with them for 9 months and then as COVID settled down she decided to leave Australia to see her family back home. Visa struggles made it difficult for her to return to Aus so she stayed with her family
I feel for her tbh.. When she found her own housemates she had to leave them very suddenly.. then she spent the rest of the time living with you and your housemates or her family
Frankly I don't think either of you are in the wrong here, but I would extend some empathy to her. It's fine if you live in the same city and have date nights and still let her live! with some housemates for a while. You're very young and there's gonna be a long time in your life of you living together.