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top off [Multi Goal]
Date: October 6, 2022
AmateurPub
AmateurPub
top off [Multi Goal]
There’s a couple things you can do. Look for local women’s shelters. There are some absolutely wonderful people in this world that help out women in your exact situation. You are in an abusive marriage, and your family sounds toxic. Threatening self harm is a form of manipulation and control – it’s absolutely abusive. You should get out.
Honestly, I’d take the above option over anything else given your circumstances. Otherwise you can start saving discreetly until you have enough to get a place. I got my first apartment at 19 with almost nothing. That was the year I could fight back and win and he didn’t like that.
Immediately start looking for employment elsewhere. Call temp agencies, look at want ads.. Put a plan in place. An exit plan.
I’m the mean time, go very low contact or completely no contact with your family. You need to be fully independent and have some counseling under your belt before you attempt to engage with them.
I also think op should tell her friend, but I really don’t think it’s fair to say she’s protecting the abuser (or that any victims are in staying silent). Abuse victims also have to protect themselves, and they’re allowed to put themselves first. She may face retaliation from him (potentially even risking physical violence), she may not be mentally able to handle the social fallout so soon after her trauma, etc. She can decide when or if she wants to share, and if he continues abusing, it’s no one’s fault but his.
In my situation, I'd take it as a joke. It's entirely situational, though. There's a reason you're put off by this, which is worth exploring. Is this the only reason you don't trust her? Has she crossed other boundaries? Does she make thoughtless 'jokes' often? Trust your instincts.
I think you meant to post this on r/nosleep.
Serious question:
You're worried 'IRL he'd want all this and more'….
What's so sacrilegious about about a man in a committed relationship showing up at his significant other's door hot?
Do you fall on the 'sex is only for making babies/no other sexual intimacy or fun' end of the religiosity scale?
I was raised RC and aside from some less than progressive views on issues (LGBTQ+/abortion) and some pretty bad sex ed (and culture of)…. Last I checked nowhere in the bible does it say 'thou shalt not have fun, get kinky, or dance around with your dink out' ??♂️
I didn’t realize until we just were about to leave. She made the excuse
So basically she conned him into going on a romantic vacation together? Why did he still go if he realized it before they left?
It seems like she is pursuing him if nothing is going on. When you have seen them interact, is she flirty?
INFO: How old are you? Because you sound extremely immature and need to grow up. This is not gonna be the first time that someone you date has a female friend and if this is how you are going to behave and think when they TOUCH ARMS, you have a lifetime of jealousy and pain ahead of you. You can't stop someone from being friends or having a platonic relationship with someone that they are close with. Not your jurisdiction. I'd suggest you do some work on yourself instead to find out where all of this jealousy and resentment is coming from.
Interesting moral dilemma presented as an actual event.
What do trolls do with their karma?
Seems like you tried talking to him and all he has to say is “it’s just jokes”. The guy has a problem with you but I don’t think any amount of putting him on the spot or confrontation would make him spill the beans so I’d approach it differently. Whatever he says, just say “uhm, sure” and move on to talking to someone else. The bigger your reaction, the bigger his thrill.
Also, there is one other thing to consider. You say this guy is continuously mean or passive aggressive to you. He’s still always invited. That can mean only two things – either you have a problem with him and take everything too personally, or your friends are just as big of an AH as he is for hanging out with a bully.
she is a liar. it is not an overreaction. the trust is dead. your relationship can’t survive without trust. you only delayed the inevitable.
on a side note, she is clearly afraid of you, that is also a concern. if your Gf can’t tell you what is going on in her life because she is afraid, that is a problem. it is not healthy for you nor for her. maybe you should work on that in your next relationship. this one is circling the drain.
He has take the test first