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Date: November 24, 2022
AmateurPub
So your friend thinks none of her friends will offer to have dinner with her on her 40th birthday because she is married? That's stupid. A lot of people don't enjoy turning 40. 20, cool, 30 cool, 40 cry, 50 cool. She has had many opportunities to just be a good friend to you instead of a judgemental nag. 4 year olds are work, not even in school. I can't imagine dating with a kid that age.
I do think it is possible to set boundaries with people without cutting them off immediately. Let yourself cool off. Let your birthday pass. Then decide if you want to have a relationship with this woman.
Op didn't set up a meeting behind his back or anything.
If he thought it was a friend prancing him, he would not have been polite (“hey I saw you … have a good day”).
You can say the following to him:
“I feel hurt when you make jokes about me being ‘white washed’ or when you make fun of my accent or when you say ‘I’m not Mexican enough’. I would appreciate it if you stopped making fun of my heritage.”
Set a firm boundary with this and stick to it. If he keeps doing it, you can interrupt him by saying you’re not comfortable with what he’s joking about. It’s not a joke if he’s the only one who finds it funny. If he continuously crossing this boundary, then you should absolutely reconsider this relationship and see if it’s doing you more harm than good. It’s very difficult to stay in a relationship with someone if you feel like they don’t respect you. Everyone deserves respect from their significant others.
Your mom seems manic af. Do not do this. Wth.
You sound selfish. You’re getting an ego boost off of this. Leave both of them alone.
Do what you need to do to safely leave this guy.
This is your first relationship, it can be quite shocking to learn your partner's number, but as someone who has dated a lot, that number matters less and less and I strongly encourage you to stop fixating on it. You are falling into a trap society has set for you, we perpetuate that girls having several sexual partners = bad. But it just isn't.
Also, you are 25, most people you are going to date will have slept with other people. Seriously, I can't emphasize enough how much you need to get out of this way of thinking.
But sure, you are allowed to break up with her, for this reason, or no reason at all, I'm just trying to caution you that this matter far less than you are currently feeling it does.