Highjacking top comment – this entire story is BS. OP is probably 17 years old now and imagining what he’ll do in the future when he can afford to buy a car.
In order to purchase a car, you need car insurance ahead of time. You also need to file paperwork to get the car/title registered in your name. You could technically give a friend a downpayment for a car (cash, check etc) but outright purchasing a car on behalf of a non-dependent isn’t possible
Ditch him. That isn't love. Nobody should ever treat their partner like that, especially when their partner has just lost a loved one and is grieving. Dude is selfish and guaranteed if you stay, he'll get weird and controlling about other things too. Or cheat himself since he's so obsessed with sex whenever he wants.
Yes you have a chance because she's agreed to going out otherwise she would have rejected you back if she wasn't interested in that way. If the past comes up, just be honest. Read her body language throughout the evening to know if it's worth making a move or not.
Here is what you tell her. LOL. LMAO. Then you block. If you want to be nice, because the bill is in your name? Say: You pay the bill or I call them and cancel the service. Those are your two options and any other than those two I will default to canceling the service.
Yeah, I commented on this right after it was posted and just came back and read all the new ones. Poor OP. Nothing she said is really all that weird and now she's dealing with all these uncalled for and nasty comments after her boyfriend just took off. These people are acting like she has decapitated cat heads and dried dog turds stashed all over the house. Sometimes the internet can be so…ugh.
this is definitely not to excuse his behavior because i have told him that it was NOT okay to go against our decisions, but his line of thought was that he wanted to get this big stuff out of the way to prep for baby #2 because originally our plan was to start trying in march. so he did explain this to me later when we discussed how i was frustrated with his actions.
this instace was really the only time he's ever strayed from what we agreed to which is why i was taken aback by ellie. and as for the shceudling, we agreed to this before we even decided to have children. my schedule is hectic but he takes over 100% on his days off and i can sleep/rest/get alone time on these days.
I think it may have even been a social experiment. Like one person doing the same post, making like variations to mask that it is the same person, and doing one from female point of view, one for the guy. If they were expecting different responses about the guy, it was a back fire.
You’re not a monster, but you need to understand something. Dogs are very emotionally aware animals, and know if you don’t like them or are happy with or mad at them. This dog is 14. He’s elderly, and is likely appreciative to even have a home rather than dying in a shelter due to age. He will stay by you if you’re sick or sad, and will always be happy to see you at the end of a day. Always.
Is it REALLY that hot to find some love for the dog, and is his hair and breath really so bothersome that he doesn’t deserve a little latitude in his twilight years? As they say, you can tell a LOT about people by the way they treat animals.
Sounds like he’s trying to trap you. And from another comment, it sounds like you’ve only been together 3 months? I hope you end things with him soon. Things don’t normally end well with men like him..
I know it’s unfair and he’s probably superficial and a jerk but you need to pay attention to it. There are more and more posts every day about this situation. I know we’re supposed to be body positivity but a lot of men just don’t like heavy women. It’s not fair it’s not right, but it is kind of the way it is and you know what it’s always been that way.
This was me and my ex. We were together for like 8 years starting in high school. Then we broke up. Or specifically she broke up with me, but we stayed FWB’s. The reality was I was still in love with her and she still wanted the benefit of having me as her boyfriend without any commitment to me(such as monogamy). I eventually moved about 500 miles away to focus on my future, and then she moved to the other end of the country. She still would be emotionally abusive to me, even as I was in a new relationship. It took my new girlfriend to force me to finally block her to get that toxicity out of my life.
This arrangement won’t work. Either accept you guys are together and toxic, or cut the cord.
It wasn't in public, they went back to the hotel first, and I agree that it's very unlikely. But not impossible.
Three of the other nine were there too. But my GF doesn't really know them. And I'm 90% certain they'll automatically side with their friend, so I can't trust any of them to be unbiased.
Your wife has shown she doesn’t love you, has no respect for you and continually cheats on you. The “perfect life” you describe is a lie.
But the good news is you can leave her and find that perfect life with a woman who will actually love and respect you. You won’t find that with your current wife. Your kids deserve a happy father. Leave her man.
Hmm. That's terrible advice. Either you accept your spouse as is or you leave. If that means accepting she doesn't want kids and make peace with that or start over. She has the most invested in this decision and if she accidentally got pregnant she could have an abortion.
Good question. When I have a practice coming up I will try to get stuff done during the week so there is less to do on the weekend (dishes/laundry/trash/litter boxes/sinks/countertops/etc.). She does not get stuck with all the chores on Sunday, I still do my best to pull my weight after practice. The main chores really are the grocery shopping and vacuuming, and I normally do those on weekends when I don't have practice.
People change so much from 20 to 28. Be thankful it was called off, you saved a ton by not needing lawyers. Even if you lost deposits that is nothing in compared to lawyer fees.
I have some very, very lovely friends who mean the world to me and I never fall out with them. I guess this friend just most gets my humour and we just bounce off each other well and enjoy spending time together – when it’s good, it’s awesome, when it’s bad it’s nuclear. I don’t have that with any of my other friends.
I have tried in the past, and she acknowledges what’s happening and says that she’ll do something about it if she gets sick again, and then she just… doesn’t.
She’s in a “well state” now, and I did talk to her about it recently, when I had to push her to go get help this time, that I couldn’t accept no for an answer anymore. Except I was so angry, that I know there’s no productive discussion that could have come of it. She did agree to go get the help, and had that appointment yesterday.
Right now, because of my anger, and because she’s doing the things I want her to do so that we can actually work on the relationship, I’m trying not to address anything right now until she’s been on a regimen for awhile. I think things can be more productive that way, and that things might improve a bit in their own anyway, and I don’t want to make things worse with my anger, when she’s actually making moves to improve.
Does that make sense, or does it seem more like an excuse? Legitimately asking, cuz I’m not always good at that.
You can also call his friends and family to see if one of them can check in on him. Even if they think he's a complete dick, they probably don't want him to hurt himself.
Trying to do exactly this.. go out and meet new people but 8 years is a long time and it keeps coming back to me in the nights and my thoughts get clouded and i keep looking for answers.
You've been happy to light yourself on fire for his convenience. You always prioritized him time over your own.
He didn't have to be controlling. You “knew your place” and acted accordingly. You clearly no longer “know your place” and he is working to “put you back in your place”.
You've been happy to light yourself on fire for his convenience. You always prioritized him time over your own.
He didn't have to be controlling. You “knew your place” and acted accordingly. You clearly no longer “know your place” and he is working to “put you back in your place”.
Did I ask,yes I know I am a narcissist. And I’m completely functional.
Highjacking top comment – this entire story is BS. OP is probably 17 years old now and imagining what he’ll do in the future when he can afford to buy a car.
In order to purchase a car, you need car insurance ahead of time. You also need to file paperwork to get the car/title registered in your name. You could technically give a friend a downpayment for a car (cash, check etc) but outright purchasing a car on behalf of a non-dependent isn’t possible
It seems like he is sending you a message?
Ditch him. That isn't love. Nobody should ever treat their partner like that, especially when their partner has just lost a loved one and is grieving. Dude is selfish and guaranteed if you stay, he'll get weird and controlling about other things too. Or cheat himself since he's so obsessed with sex whenever he wants.
(partner is non binary)
Yes you have a chance because she's agreed to going out otherwise she would have rejected you back if she wasn't interested in that way. If the past comes up, just be honest. Read her body language throughout the evening to know if it's worth making a move or not.
Here is what you tell her. LOL. LMAO. Then you block. If you want to be nice, because the bill is in your name? Say: You pay the bill or I call them and cancel the service. Those are your two options and any other than those two I will default to canceling the service.
Yeah, I commented on this right after it was posted and just came back and read all the new ones. Poor OP. Nothing she said is really all that weird and now she's dealing with all these uncalled for and nasty comments after her boyfriend just took off. These people are acting like she has decapitated cat heads and dried dog turds stashed all over the house. Sometimes the internet can be so…ugh.
Much appreciate
A lot of you have made me embarrassed I even posted. Thanks. Will delete as to not bother anymore of you.
Completely agree, thank you
you should definitely sit him down and openly talk to him about your feelings
this is definitely not to excuse his behavior because i have told him that it was NOT okay to go against our decisions, but his line of thought was that he wanted to get this big stuff out of the way to prep for baby #2 because originally our plan was to start trying in march. so he did explain this to me later when we discussed how i was frustrated with his actions.
this instace was really the only time he's ever strayed from what we agreed to which is why i was taken aback by ellie. and as for the shceudling, we agreed to this before we even decided to have children. my schedule is hectic but he takes over 100% on his days off and i can sleep/rest/get alone time on these days.
Wife ounce cut bangs and I had a hot time with that. Did not affect anything whatsoever.
Yeah, I've been getting those worries too… It just felt like he wouldn't be that type of guy, but at least I'm not staying to find out.
Then you are just not compatible at all?
I think it may have even been a social experiment. Like one person doing the same post, making like variations to mask that it is the same person, and doing one from female point of view, one for the guy. If they were expecting different responses about the guy, it was a back fire.
You’re not a monster, but you need to understand something. Dogs are very emotionally aware animals, and know if you don’t like them or are happy with or mad at them. This dog is 14. He’s elderly, and is likely appreciative to even have a home rather than dying in a shelter due to age. He will stay by you if you’re sick or sad, and will always be happy to see you at the end of a day. Always.
Is it REALLY that hot to find some love for the dog, and is his hair and breath really so bothersome that he doesn’t deserve a little latitude in his twilight years? As they say, you can tell a LOT about people by the way they treat animals.
Sounds like he’s trying to trap you. And from another comment, it sounds like you’ve only been together 3 months? I hope you end things with him soon. Things don’t normally end well with men like him..
I know it’s unfair and he’s probably superficial and a jerk but you need to pay attention to it. There are more and more posts every day about this situation. I know we’re supposed to be body positivity but a lot of men just don’t like heavy women. It’s not fair it’s not right, but it is kind of the way it is and you know what it’s always been that way.
This was me and my ex. We were together for like 8 years starting in high school. Then we broke up. Or specifically she broke up with me, but we stayed FWB’s. The reality was I was still in love with her and she still wanted the benefit of having me as her boyfriend without any commitment to me(such as monogamy). I eventually moved about 500 miles away to focus on my future, and then she moved to the other end of the country. She still would be emotionally abusive to me, even as I was in a new relationship. It took my new girlfriend to force me to finally block her to get that toxicity out of my life.
This arrangement won’t work. Either accept you guys are together and toxic, or cut the cord.
You can definitely groom adults. While we think of young children when we hear 'grooming', it's actually grooming of a minor.
It wasn't in public, they went back to the hotel first, and I agree that it's very unlikely. But not impossible.
Three of the other nine were there too. But my GF doesn't really know them. And I'm 90% certain they'll automatically side with their friend, so I can't trust any of them to be unbiased.
Your wife has shown she doesn’t love you, has no respect for you and continually cheats on you. The “perfect life” you describe is a lie.
But the good news is you can leave her and find that perfect life with a woman who will actually love and respect you. You won’t find that with your current wife. Your kids deserve a happy father. Leave her man.
She does anal for a Klondike bar.
Hmm. That's terrible advice. Either you accept your spouse as is or you leave. If that means accepting she doesn't want kids and make peace with that or start over. She has the most invested in this decision and if she accidentally got pregnant she could have an abortion.
Good for you!!!
you need therapy.
Good question. When I have a practice coming up I will try to get stuff done during the week so there is less to do on the weekend (dishes/laundry/trash/litter boxes/sinks/countertops/etc.). She does not get stuck with all the chores on Sunday, I still do my best to pull my weight after practice. The main chores really are the grocery shopping and vacuuming, and I normally do those on weekends when I don't have practice.
People change so much from 20 to 28. Be thankful it was called off, you saved a ton by not needing lawyers. Even if you lost deposits that is nothing in compared to lawyer fees.
I have some very, very lovely friends who mean the world to me and I never fall out with them. I guess this friend just most gets my humour and we just bounce off each other well and enjoy spending time together – when it’s good, it’s awesome, when it’s bad it’s nuclear. I don’t have that with any of my other friends.
I have been in no contact since the 26th of Feb to focus on myself and my trinity of health, wealth, and relationships.
Continue doing that.
I have tried in the past, and she acknowledges what’s happening and says that she’ll do something about it if she gets sick again, and then she just… doesn’t.
She’s in a “well state” now, and I did talk to her about it recently, when I had to push her to go get help this time, that I couldn’t accept no for an answer anymore. Except I was so angry, that I know there’s no productive discussion that could have come of it. She did agree to go get the help, and had that appointment yesterday.
Right now, because of my anger, and because she’s doing the things I want her to do so that we can actually work on the relationship, I’m trying not to address anything right now until she’s been on a regimen for awhile. I think things can be more productive that way, and that things might improve a bit in their own anyway, and I don’t want to make things worse with my anger, when she’s actually making moves to improve.
Does that make sense, or does it seem more like an excuse? Legitimately asking, cuz I’m not always good at that.
I second this – only tell her what’s true, and get the supports you need.
You can also call his friends and family to see if one of them can check in on him. Even if they think he's a complete dick, they probably don't want him to hurt himself.
Trying to do exactly this.. go out and meet new people but 8 years is a long time and it keeps coming back to me in the nights and my thoughts get clouded and i keep looking for answers.
You've been happy to light yourself on fire for his convenience. You always prioritized him time over your own.
He didn't have to be controlling. You “knew your place” and acted accordingly. You clearly no longer “know your place” and he is working to “put you back in your place”.
You've been happy to light yourself on fire for his convenience. You always prioritized him time over your own.
He didn't have to be controlling. You “knew your place” and acted accordingly. You clearly no longer “know your place” and he is working to “put you back in your place”.
We haven’t spoken since he told me. When he told me I tried to talk about it further but just got left on read