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Luc, ía, 24 y.o.
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Date: October 31, 2022
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He was a very vanilla person before we met so i think he is just getting used to it but getting confused that sometimes no means no but othertimes i dont mean no for real
Were you drinking? If so I'd look into help for that. Even if not I'd look into therapy to control the impulsiveness and dig into the root cause of your self-destructive behavior.
Be honest to your bf and tell him what work you plan to do to address it and how you'll hold yourself accountable. He can decide what is best for him at that point.
Don't listen to the people calling you trash though. You have work to do but this one act doesn't define you as a person and self-hatred will just make it harder to improve yourself.
Nah this post is 100% fake
You are not guilty for her cheating, even if you keep your mouth closed. He is not your friend and you don't own anything to him. You are not a bad person, she is. He deserves to know, but it's up to you if you want to let him know, it's not your responsibility, you didn't cross any boundary.
I think you're going to have to talk to him about it more than once. Like you're just going to have to honestly point out when he's being mean or when he's gaslighting or whatever all the time. It's not going to be quick.
With couples therapy, you might be able to get to the heart of his anger. There's something behind this, some sort of negative emotion that's making him behave this way. If he's interesting in digging it up, it could be really worthwhile.
bad joke! in the best way…
I’m ignoring the whole cat thing, because it seems like he doesn’t like the cat, this isn’t new, it’s been going on for 2 years.
So either, this “abuse” to the cat hasn’t been abuse, or he has been abusing the cat and OP did nothing to stop it for 2 years which makes her as AH.
What I’m focusing on is the overdramatic and aggressive response. Where you drinking or on drugs that affected your response? If you were stop drinking/taking drugs. If you were sober, that’s not an appropriate response in any situation.
At the end of the day you were swearing and throwing things at him until he drove away. That’s abuse. You make it up to him by apologising and never seeing him again.
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He’s keeping you down to control you
Yeah, I would dump her for sure.
Just putting my two cents in…
She may not know your alive still, and may have grieved for you. While she may not want to maintain a friendship with you, I’m certain she’d want to know you’re alive, and reasonably safe.
I wish you luck.
He’s being weird.
He could have stopped you before calling her in speaker, like at any point. Even after she picked up.
He’s embarrassed and that’s his fault.
He will get over it.
Go to brunch with your bff and forget about this
Does make you wonder how this got disclosed from the medical professional though.
That is a SERIOUS breach of privacy.
My mom introduced me to some guy when I was 16, calling him a “healer” and saying I needed his action. He strangled me and threw water at me while reciting the Quran. I'm not even a Muslim and neither is my dad. That guy was a con, and she had him live! with us for MONTHS while my dad was away taking care of our assets abroad, because she was stupid enough to believe he had some kind of mystical power. Then, when I was 16, she took me to her birth country to meet another one of her “healers”. She stood in a separate but concomitant room while that guy was sexually assaulting me and I called out for her to act and make it stop. Then, she proceeded to smear me to my dad, so much so that he doubted my word. Only my aunt (not even my aunt by blood, a STRANGER who was a friend of hers) believed me and got into her so that she would believe me too. Do not fucking talk to me about loyalty. My mother never had any towards me.
It does not. Which sucks. Technically it is my employer that is toxic, that made all of this happen. Me and him are fine, lol.
YOU ARE NOT FINE. what you are doing is FUCKING CRAZY. I would be more inclined to tell her to get a restraining order than anything else.
Oh. Yeah i meamt to post this on another topic, huh, my phone did a weird thing.
What happens when she still stinks after he brushes his teeth? Does the blame still fall on him?
You should absolutely move on and there is no point at all whatsoever in trying to resolve the issue.
It’s one thing that there have been a lot of arguments recently in your new relationship, it’s another thing that you have both identified the root cause of the issue that’s causing the continual arguments, that being poor communication (which clearly seems to be on his part) most people in a relationship don’t even bother to drill down to find the root cause of the problem and they just let the situation get worse.
Everything is perfect up until that point of trying to solve the problem BUT WTF is he on about that he isn’t prepared to compromise and make some minor changes/adjustments??
It clearly will only require a very small change that will stop all of these arguments??
For me personally if he is not prepared to compromise and make a couple of minor tweaks then he will NEVER EVER Be able to maintain a long term relationship and all of his future relationships will always fail in the early stages. Compromising with each other in a relationship is one of the core foundations that a relationship is built on and is required for a relationship to succeed.
Although he has told you that he is not prepared to make this small compromise that statement alone has even bigger implications. That being that he is not prepared to make a small compromise for the sake of your relationship, not prepared to do it for you which is him being disrespectful to you personally, he is disrespecting your relationship with each other and furthermore he is the sole person who is responsible for these arguments happening as it’s his poor communication that is causing it each and every time. You also have to remind yourself that if he can’t compromise here and make a small change then just think about all of the 1000s and 1000s of situations in the future where compromise from both of you would be needed in this relationship and just think about the fact that he won’t be compromising with you on any of them and just think of those big relationship decisions like moving to a new place etc, if he won’t budge on this then he certainly won’t on the big stuff. You are literally looking at a future relationship where he decided pizza for takeout on a Saturday night and the following Saturday it would be your turn to choose what take out you have and you want Chinese and he won’t compromise and he will want pizza again even though it’s your turn to choose and you end up with pizza again, those day to day normal non existent decisions are how it’s going to go.
Personally I think him saying he won’t compromise for something so bloody small, then taking into account you said these arguments have been continual and regular, even after you telling him that he is leaving you in the lurch with agreed plans I have to wonder if he orchestrated this on purpose, continually changing plans at the last minute, not telling you about the changes and continually letting you down even after you asking him for notification of any changes, orchestrated it so it caused this exact situation because he wants to end the relationship anyway for other reasons but he done it this way to force it. Saying that you aren’t prepared to compromise and make a small change is always going to be a relationship breaker for anyone and he would know this when he said it so clearly he isn’t bothered about the relationship or the relationship ending that for me also indicates that he has orchestrated this to happen on purpose.
Do you have a smart watch that can check someone's pulse? Make sure he's wearing that shit and tell him you heard what he said. If it goes through the roof, you got your answer… or you start so much drama that he went into crisis mode again. Hey, you should know what riles him up by now, not me.
Do you have a smart watch that can check someone's pulse? Make sure he's wearing that shit and tell him you heard what he said. If it goes through the roof, you got your answer… or you start so much drama that he went into crisis mode again. Hey, you should know what riles him up by now, not me.
She says we can change her meds but she isn’t willing to talk any further than that. She gets really upset and cries and then her mood is ruined for the rest of the day.
No offense, but have you ever stopped and listened to him?
It seems like you are using the 2.5 months as a reason for him to asking for divorce and then he sprung his dissatisfaction onto you. Have you ever stopped and actually communicated with each other? Have you ever got help for your mental health?
He wants a divorce maybe because he is tired of repeating himself. He is tired of putting in all the effort.
Someone jumping onto divorce (with the exception of betrayal) overnight. It seems like maybe due to mental health issues you weren’t listening to him.
Hey maybe have him listen to Dr.John Delony. He is the the man sphere but at least a bit more balanced might be a way to bring him out of it a bit
your boyfriend is a homosexual and wants to do what he would like to with another boy?
This may be an AH suggestion but maybe try thinking of it like this:
What are the odds you graduate from Med School more than once? Compare that to the odds your brothers marriage lasts.
Regardless, you did something freaking awesome and you deserve to be celebrated.
Tg here is nothing wrong with your vagina. Your bf is a piece of shit who is trying to manipulate you into doing anal by negging you.
Get the hell out of there and away from him.
Slow is a good idea. I agree relationships should be reciprocal and equal…I don’t mind her being the ‘bread winner’ but I do feel bad to think I couldn’t do enough for her which is why I’ve got cold feet. Definitely willing to work my ass off double time if it means making more money to take her out though lol
You should refuse doing it. Whoever cooks needs to clean the dishes. No one likes cleaning the dishes but it’s a chore we all need to do. I don’t think a lot of people will be on the same boat as you, this is just common sense. Whoever cooks in our house is responsible from start to finish when cooking, so we can alternatively relax when me or my wife cook.
Fuck em. You deserve better than that.