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Alcohol should never be scapegoated as the direct cause of infidelity because it isn't. All it does is dull your inner filter and inhibitions in order to bring your underlying desires to the forefront. “I can't drink because it makes me want to kiss random girls, oopsie!” That's not how any of this works….
Your post was removed for the following reason(s):
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What a twit your friend sounds like. Someone advises you not to do something potentially dangerous or detrimental to your health and your friend says they are being controlling. Get a new friend.
Just because you are driven to plan for the future, it doesn’t mean you’re right to do so. Your boyfriend appears to have a different perspective from you, and it clearly wigs you out. But it’s not wrong for him to live in the moment and avoid making broad future plans. No clue why that would be “heartbreaking” to you.
It’s kind of odd she’s been going alone to events all this time.
Charitably, I’m assuming it was a pattern she fell into very early in the relationship and didn’t think about. She should have, but these things happen.
I've had the same conversation with my partner related to one of my exes. He took it as a challenge to be the best I've ever had, and I think it's adorable.
I'd pick him over anyone, because he's an amazing person and I love him. The best I had turned out to be an absolute douche, and I wish I didn't have to share a planet with him.
That was all beyond inappropriate — of him for saying it, and of her for not shutting it down. The things he was saying were absolutely putting the moves on her (and disrespecting you and your relationship with her), and her falling asleep with him on the line is totally girlfriend behavior. She’s either very naive, or she thinks you’re a doormat.
We talked about it before. I’m in the works of trying to get a second job. He said he would help me if I was ever struggling. I just hate asking. Food is the only thing I’m okay with because he has the appetite of a beast lol, but I cook and clean in return.
Your BF is a manipulative alcoholic who chooses not to work or resolve HIS problems.
Whatever he did after you threw him out is not your responsibility. Block his number, go full NC. This is not your situation to resolve. He needs to own his shit and get help. Even if he did, you shouldn’t get back together.
He was taking his right-wing christianity to an ancient culture, dividing families amongst religious lines, increasing homophobia in a culture that for the longest time has accepted a third gender. All to continue to feel holier-than-thou as the white savior.
It's always wild to me how Christians casually praise cultural genocide like it's a great thing
Hello /u/Sonofagun69_,
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Alcohol should never be scapegoated as the direct cause of infidelity because it isn't. All it does is dull your inner filter and inhibitions in order to bring your underlying desires to the forefront. “I can't drink because it makes me want to kiss random girls, oopsie!” That's not how any of this works….
Hello /u/Angelchild125,
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What a twit your friend sounds like. Someone advises you not to do something potentially dangerous or detrimental to your health and your friend says they are being controlling. Get a new friend.
Why this sound like Richmond VA
Just because you are driven to plan for the future, it doesn’t mean you’re right to do so. Your boyfriend appears to have a different perspective from you, and it clearly wigs you out. But it’s not wrong for him to live in the moment and avoid making broad future plans. No clue why that would be “heartbreaking” to you.
It’s kind of odd she’s been going alone to events all this time.
Charitably, I’m assuming it was a pattern she fell into very early in the relationship and didn’t think about. She should have, but these things happen.
See lawyer and get divorce papers drawn up..
He may change his mind.
And yet, she picked you.
I've had the same conversation with my partner related to one of my exes. He took it as a challenge to be the best I've ever had, and I think it's adorable.
I'd pick him over anyone, because he's an amazing person and I love him. The best I had turned out to be an absolute douche, and I wish I didn't have to share a planet with him.
Thanks for the advice, I appreciate it.
That was all beyond inappropriate — of him for saying it, and of her for not shutting it down. The things he was saying were absolutely putting the moves on her (and disrespecting you and your relationship with her), and her falling asleep with him on the line is totally girlfriend behavior. She’s either very naive, or she thinks you’re a doormat.
Because she’s young and already trapped with a guy who punishes her for hair on the floor.
We talked about it before. I’m in the works of trying to get a second job. He said he would help me if I was ever struggling. I just hate asking. Food is the only thing I’m okay with because he has the appetite of a beast lol, but I cook and clean in return.
He needs therapy, and I have to ask, are you a smaller framed or petite woman? You know
Your BF is a manipulative alcoholic who chooses not to work or resolve HIS problems.
Whatever he did after you threw him out is not your responsibility. Block his number, go full NC. This is not your situation to resolve. He needs to own his shit and get help. Even if he did, you shouldn’t get back together.
Save yourself.
He was taking his right-wing christianity to an ancient culture, dividing families amongst religious lines, increasing homophobia in a culture that for the longest time has accepted a third gender. All to continue to feel holier-than-thou as the white savior.
It's always wild to me how Christians casually praise cultural genocide like it's a great thing