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  1. I would not date her. She could have changed and is now a different person, but you will always see that part of her. She kept it up until she was 13. 13-year-olds know better. They know how their actions can affect others, yet she kept on bullying you.

    You have scars on your heart and she helped make them. A healed scar is still a scar. You are right in forgiving her but that does not mean the past is the past. You will still see what she did to you when you look at her. It will not be every single time, but you will. That is just asking for random pain in your life.

    Then you have to take into consideration how many of those kids who bullied you are still in her social circle. You will have to interact with them.

    I know relationships are not comparing costs versus benefits. They have emotions tied to them also. In this case the costs are too high for you. There is nothing in it for you right now. You do not know her. She would need to do a lot more to prove to you she has changed. Feeling bad about one's past actions and saying sorry is not enough. That is regret. I do not see any remorse. She might have it but you did not mention anything to show that she does.

  2. Look. Probably 99/100 times there’s a relationship with this big of an age gap, the older person has predatory tendencies and it probably isn’t a good situation for the younger person.

    If you believe you and your partner are the exception, I would recommend taking a big step back and looking at your relationship with as objective of a view as you can and reassess what you believe about it.

    You owe yourself to at the very least look at what you’re doing with your life and decide if you still think it’s right. That goes for you very one and applies to more than just your relationships. Every once in a while, assess your situation and whether it’s really what you want or need and if there’s something you can do to make it better.

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