He is gaslighting you to no end. Calling you a lunatic for trying to express your feelings, lying to you and making empty promises, he sounds horrible to be around. I’m so sorry but I truly think it would be best for you, him, and your children to separate. More than we realize, kids are sensitive to tension in the home, and “staying together for the kids” is often what drives families apart in the end. You deserve to be happy, and it sounds like you’ve really given this marriage all you could give. Time to prioritize your own wants and needs. Doing so will also teach your girls an important lesson – don’t settle for less than you deserve.
Thank you so much for the advice! I can definitely tell that it is too much for him 🙁 He doesn't work, from what I know he uses savings and financial support from his parents.
I will definitely look into getting home assistance and hopefully making things more manageable for him.
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If he wants to not use condoms that bad he needs to get the snip snip. But honestly I would really recommend you think about if this man is really a caring partner. My partner and I always use condoms because I don't want sperm throwing off my ph balance and he has never pressed me or been mad about that choice because he respects me and the decisions I make about my body. And if he ever threatened me or tried to coerce me with cheating I would leave him immediately.
I agree with the others she doesn’t respect you and likely would dump you first chance she got if a taller guy came around. If she has body issues maybe remind her that it doesn’t feel nice to have someone call it out.
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Okay, so, do you have an HR you can go to? It's one thing to compliment your nails, but the moment he started talking about your legs…. That's not work appropriate.
You shouldn't leave your dream project over that, though. If you don't think your job will handle it if you reported the creepy behavior, you really have the choice to leave or deal with it yourself. Whether dealing with it us setting that boundary or however that looks for you… I'm sorry you're in this situation.
Block her. She’s abusing you, and causing huge amounts of stress. It’s great that she was there for you, but right now she’s causing way more harm then good.
You might naturally want to stay at home all day. But you can't always just give in to your strongest natural tendencies. Your husband is right, you can't just stay at home all day. You need a life outside of your marriage. You need friends and you need to get over your anxiety so you can properly function as an adult human being.
Because he considers you the stable backup plan who will never leave if you haven't yet. If he can get you the marriage he figures the heavy lifting is done.
Thank you. I think so too that id feel like I was making a big mistake if I let her go but at the same time I’d feel the same way if I moved in with her right away. I just don’t believe I’m ready for the next stage of life yet. I’m barely 26 and don’t have my feet grounded yet and therefore am scared to have my feet sweep under from me and wake up in an entire new environment one day.
Thanks for your understanding and advice 🙂 it’s a tricky one and (being new to Reddit) I can see how these conversations can become rabbit holes so I won’t go answering all follow up questions. But these are good points you brought up so thanks again.
Absolutely. Not only that but they get irrationally angry that other people have families and communities and can rely on each other. And brag about not knowing their neighbors in the place they lived 10+ years. Sad but none of my business haha.
Me any one of my exes played a strip drinking game with all his mates and at the end the dude was standing there hard with a sock on his dick and I thought it was fucking hilarious. I'd feel the same if I hadn't have been present lol. People need to realise they don't own their partners bodies and that having the autonomy to choose when to be very hot doesn't mean your partner is disrespecting your or your relationship lmao.
Wonder if all these posters think OP is disrespecting his GF everytime he goes to a public pool and takes his shirt off ….
Yea noticed this too. Just seems like a creative writing prompt, where they forgot to ask for advice. And if it's fake there is no reason to comment anything more.
If your husband wants you to co sign it’s just because he wants to share the consequences when it goes south. I would honestly not even entertain the idea and absolutely not go through with it at all! He was clear he wanted finances separate so separate it is
So you started dating a minor child who is freshly 18 and you’re wondering why she doesn’t have the emotional maturity you’re looking for in an adult relationship.
She’s logging onto tinder to see if he’s logging onto tinder. And then she logs onto Reddit to complain about him to everyone.
It’s like that joke about the lady who calls the cops to report that the man next door is exposing himself. Two cops arrive at her door, and she tells them, “Upstairs, officers.” They follow her upstairs to the bathroom, where she points out the window. In the bathroom of the house next door, a man is taking a bath in his bathtub.
“Lady, he’s just taking a bath!” the cop tells her.
“Oh, yeah?” she says. “You get up there on that cabinet and tell me what you see.”
Child support is to provide for the child. Sounds like he is willing to pay what is required for that. He isn’t willing to pay her alimony. Unless they had some agreement on her not working, she isn’t entitled to that.
I'm gearing up to confront an ex-best friend at a wedding this weekend. Well, not confront. After close to six years after shit hit the fan and I just sort of peace'd out of her life (and then last year when she started telling mutual friends she wouldn't turn up to events I was at because ??? – they asked me why, I told them the last time I'd spoken to her was five years previous and had no fucking idea). But she's the sort of person who I think is going to be like 'we need to talk' and I've been practicing what I think is the perfect phrase, “I wish you all the best, but I'm not interested in being part of your life.” I don't think there's any way to respond to that. Do the same with this friend, “Thanks for reaching out, but I've no interest in being part of your life. All the best.” Then, block again.
I'm gearing up to confront an ex-best friend at a wedding this weekend. Well, not confront. After close to six years after shit hit the fan and I just sort of peace'd out of her life (and then last year when she started telling mutual friends she wouldn't turn up to events I was at because ??? – they asked me why, I told them the last time I'd spoken to her was five years previous and had no fucking idea). But she's the sort of person who I think is going to be like 'we need to talk' and I've been practicing what I think is the perfect phrase, “I wish you all the best, but I'm not interested in being part of your life.” I don't think there's any way to respond to that. Do the same with this friend, “Thanks for reaching out, but I've no interest in being part of your life. All the best.” Then, block again.
He's admitting to you his mistakes, that's a good thing. But it's up to you if you want to continue the relationship. A relationship is based on trust, do you trust him?
It is easy to say no, isn't it?
Cock rings work wonders. Also introducing new toys.
He is gaslighting you to no end. Calling you a lunatic for trying to express your feelings, lying to you and making empty promises, he sounds horrible to be around. I’m so sorry but I truly think it would be best for you, him, and your children to separate. More than we realize, kids are sensitive to tension in the home, and “staying together for the kids” is often what drives families apart in the end. You deserve to be happy, and it sounds like you’ve really given this marriage all you could give. Time to prioritize your own wants and needs. Doing so will also teach your girls an important lesson – don’t settle for less than you deserve.
Yes to therapy, no to surgery. He's with you so he clearly sees a beautiful woman.
Thank you so much for the advice! I can definitely tell that it is too much for him 🙁 He doesn't work, from what I know he uses savings and financial support from his parents.
I will definitely look into getting home assistance and hopefully making things more manageable for him.
Hello /u/T0nic1. We do not allow submissions that involve minors. Should you have any questions, or if you feel this was in error please contact our mod team.
Reposting and changing your age(s) to get around our rules will result in a permanent ban.
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Thank you so much and I’m so sorry you have had to deal with the pain.
Usually when young people say this its because they want out and dont have the courage to do so. Not saying thats definitely the case but it could be.
You leave him immediately, otherwise it will get worse
48 m dating 18f went to career day at a nursing school knowing she can kill me, heal me or screw me
If he wants to not use condoms that bad he needs to get the snip snip. But honestly I would really recommend you think about if this man is really a caring partner. My partner and I always use condoms because I don't want sperm throwing off my ph balance and he has never pressed me or been mad about that choice because he respects me and the decisions I make about my body. And if he ever threatened me or tried to coerce me with cheating I would leave him immediately.
I agree with the others she doesn’t respect you and likely would dump you first chance she got if a taller guy came around. If she has body issues maybe remind her that it doesn’t feel nice to have someone call it out.
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Morning. Learn and move on.
Okay, so, do you have an HR you can go to? It's one thing to compliment your nails, but the moment he started talking about your legs…. That's not work appropriate.
You shouldn't leave your dream project over that, though. If you don't think your job will handle it if you reported the creepy behavior, you really have the choice to leave or deal with it yourself. Whether dealing with it us setting that boundary or however that looks for you… I'm sorry you're in this situation.
Block her. She’s abusing you, and causing huge amounts of stress. It’s great that she was there for you, but right now she’s causing way more harm then good.
You might naturally want to stay at home all day. But you can't always just give in to your strongest natural tendencies. Your husband is right, you can't just stay at home all day. You need a life outside of your marriage. You need friends and you need to get over your anxiety so you can properly function as an adult human being.
If you're not mad, you're not mad. What's the problem?
Because he considers you the stable backup plan who will never leave if you haven't yet. If he can get you the marriage he figures the heavy lifting is done.
Thank you. I think so too that id feel like I was making a big mistake if I let her go but at the same time I’d feel the same way if I moved in with her right away. I just don’t believe I’m ready for the next stage of life yet. I’m barely 26 and don’t have my feet grounded yet and therefore am scared to have my feet sweep under from me and wake up in an entire new environment one day.
Thanks for your understanding and advice 🙂 it’s a tricky one and (being new to Reddit) I can see how these conversations can become rabbit holes so I won’t go answering all follow up questions. But these are good points you brought up so thanks again.
He is a narcissist
Absolutely. Not only that but they get irrationally angry that other people have families and communities and can rely on each other. And brag about not knowing their neighbors in the place they lived 10+ years. Sad but none of my business haha.
Me any one of my exes played a strip drinking game with all his mates and at the end the dude was standing there hard with a sock on his dick and I thought it was fucking hilarious. I'd feel the same if I hadn't have been present lol. People need to realise they don't own their partners bodies and that having the autonomy to choose when to be very hot doesn't mean your partner is disrespecting your or your relationship lmao.
Wonder if all these posters think OP is disrespecting his GF everytime he goes to a public pool and takes his shirt off ….
when OP doesn’t seem to be seeking anything
and
OP doesn’t make one single comment
Yea noticed this too. Just seems like a creative writing prompt, where they forgot to ask for advice. And if it's fake there is no reason to comment anything more.
If your husband wants you to co sign it’s just because he wants to share the consequences when it goes south. I would honestly not even entertain the idea and absolutely not go through with it at all! He was clear he wanted finances separate so separate it is
So you started dating a minor child who is freshly 18 and you’re wondering why she doesn’t have the emotional maturity you’re looking for in an adult relationship.
Really. Tell me more.
Fucking creep.
I mean it seemed like it needed to be said. The fact that something doesn’t work perfectly doesn’t make it worthless.
It sounds kinda like he baby trapped you on purpose.
Yes lol this is the optimal ending for the audience, they love breakups
Tell your girlfriend the truth…she deserves that much
Have you thought about bringing it up with them first instead?
Sometimes people don't realize they've accidentally neglected a friendship.
If you have, and they keep doing it…that's pretty shitty.
I think smartphones with calendar apps and reminders on FB, you almost have to be aggressively trying to ignore someone's birthday.
You sure all of them use those? If so, okay. But don't underestimate some peoples' ability to be disorganized tbh.
Think maybe it'd help to throw a bday party and invite em?
I second citrus and piney smelling things. Boil some rosemary and other herbs on the stove
And started screaming and crying
Just tell her that you saw it on Reddit and see how she reacts. “Hey honey, look at this. Would you like to try? Who would be the other guy”
She’s logging onto tinder to see if he’s logging onto tinder. And then she logs onto Reddit to complain about him to everyone.
It’s like that joke about the lady who calls the cops to report that the man next door is exposing himself. Two cops arrive at her door, and she tells them, “Upstairs, officers.” They follow her upstairs to the bathroom, where she points out the window. In the bathroom of the house next door, a man is taking a bath in his bathtub.
“Lady, he’s just taking a bath!” the cop tells her.
“Oh, yeah?” she says. “You get up there on that cabinet and tell me what you see.”
Child support is to provide for the child. Sounds like he is willing to pay what is required for that. He isn’t willing to pay her alimony. Unless they had some agreement on her not working, she isn’t entitled to that.
And her breaking up with you would be a bad thing how? Sounds like she'd be doing you a favor.
You are 30, you should not care the slightest anymore about ur parents controllin issues and abuse anymore.
You are 30, you should not care the slightest anymore about ur parents controllin issues and abuse anymore.
You are 30, you should not care the slightest anymore about ur parents controllin issues and abuse anymore.
I'm gearing up to confront an ex-best friend at a wedding this weekend. Well, not confront. After close to six years after shit hit the fan and I just sort of peace'd out of her life (and then last year when she started telling mutual friends she wouldn't turn up to events I was at because ??? – they asked me why, I told them the last time I'd spoken to her was five years previous and had no fucking idea). But she's the sort of person who I think is going to be like 'we need to talk' and I've been practicing what I think is the perfect phrase, “I wish you all the best, but I'm not interested in being part of your life.” I don't think there's any way to respond to that. Do the same with this friend, “Thanks for reaching out, but I've no interest in being part of your life. All the best.” Then, block again.
I'm gearing up to confront an ex-best friend at a wedding this weekend. Well, not confront. After close to six years after shit hit the fan and I just sort of peace'd out of her life (and then last year when she started telling mutual friends she wouldn't turn up to events I was at because ??? – they asked me why, I told them the last time I'd spoken to her was five years previous and had no fucking idea). But she's the sort of person who I think is going to be like 'we need to talk' and I've been practicing what I think is the perfect phrase, “I wish you all the best, but I'm not interested in being part of your life.” I don't think there's any way to respond to that. Do the same with this friend, “Thanks for reaching out, but I've no interest in being part of your life. All the best.” Then, block again.
He's admitting to you his mistakes, that's a good thing. But it's up to you if you want to continue the relationship. A relationship is based on trust, do you trust him?