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  1. She sounds quite reserved. I'm similar. I'm passive, insecure, and can be awkward. I can only speak from my experience, but it took my partner at the time to tell me what it was he wanted/needed for me to try to be a little more active and take the initiative (which my ex messed up so bad there). I also felt that being on top was too vulnerable and I just couldn't do it right. There was, probably still is, a whole mental barrier.

    Seven years is a long time, have you not communicated all this with her? Or just kind of waited for her to do these things without prompting or being the one to come up with the ideas?

    You'll only really know the answers if you sit down and ask the questions. That will tell you if you if you need to “kill” that part of you or compromise somehow. Even if she's all for being more active, if she's not in the mood, she's not in the mood.

  2. INFO? Did you see any of these messages from your boyfriend to your sister?

    When you say he messaged her first…did he jump right into flirting or was it a simple “hey, how do I know you?” Because depending on how she “found” him…it could be totally plausible he thought it was a buddy (if it says added by number or if she searched specifically by his username. He'd be able to see that and maybe assume the person knows him IRL). Also, depending on what pics she used, it might have been obvious it was a fake account.

    Calling someone “adorable” and wanting to hook up with someone are very different things. Puppies are adorable and I'd gladly have one over to my house but I'd never have sex with one.

    If you had no trust issues before this, don't let your sisters game cause issues where there were none before. Has she ever been jealous of you growing up? Has she ever wanted something you had but couldn't have it?

    Did you ask her why she felt the need to do this?

    I'm not saying he isn't a cheater…but I have a sister, so I know how they can be…if you can take what she says as fact (or she's shown you receipts) and you 100% trust her intentions for doing this…then maybe it's not a bad idea to listen to her…but if there is even an ounce of doubt with her…don't throw away your relationship just yet. But I'd also keep my guard up just a little bit with him. Good luck.

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