How does breaking up avoid hurt? Open relationships aren’t without hurt feelings, but hurt feeling aren’t without benefit.
Breaking up damages the relationship. It’s either over or you get back together later. Neither prevents the hurt in the moment or the amount of sex had between. Why not engage the feelings and deal with the difficulty that comes with that?
I can understand that you feel tense when meeting your ' best friend' and ex on these occasions. Your 'best friend' probably not your best friend. But they were both free to do what they wanted to. I'm sorry, but this is a “you-problem”. You cannot expect your friends to cut of other friends because you feel uncomfortable when you see them during gatherings.
I think you need therapy to process your feelings regarding the breakup and your 'best friend' fucking your ex. Go NC with your 'best friend' and your ex and maybe skip the friend group gatherings while you heal.
We didn’t live together until after we got married. I didn’t really catch on right away when we got married either. I would think oh maybe I made a mistake. It took longer than it should have for me to realize, no, he is just straight up lying.
It’s stupid silly things. Like not washing a pot and putting it away and saying he did wash it. Little things I just let go and thought maybe he did and just missed spots no big deal. Over time I would see it more and more. He would make me feel crazy sometimes before I caught on.
Nah anyone who thinks a career is disgusting, degrading, and not worth respect yet still patronizes them is an asshole and the one not deserving respect.
If you don’t respect their job, but your actions where your mouth is.
he admitted that he did show my pictures to him and I told them those were private and were only meant for him to see.
If nothing else (even the age gap), this should have told you everything you needed to know, along with his friends asking if they could “have a go” like you're a bicycle.
He's using you and sharing your intimate photos with all his buddies.
I’m sorry OP but the advice you want doesn’t exist. You and your bf are profoundly incompatible and I’m not talking about your ages. He has a kid, you don’t want kids, you don’t want to parent. He thinks you should get used to it, you think your living environment is not suitable for kids. I just don’t see how your relationship can work long term when disagree already on such key life issues. Ultimately, it depends on what you can live with and what you’re willing to accept in order to make your relationship work. Only you can decide that. I wish you luck in figuring it out, I know it’s not easy for you.
Start the conversation by asking him, “you know how you got a vasectomy 5 years ago, did you go to the follow up testing appointment a few months following to make sure it actually worked? Because I have it on pretty good authority that the vasectomy was not 100% effective.”
This is way more common than you’d think. Especially with men who don’t do the follow up to check the vasectomy was 100% effective.
A peck is just a quick seal of the lips, a normal kiss involves longer and the lips moving.
How does breaking up avoid hurt? Open relationships aren’t without hurt feelings, but hurt feeling aren’t without benefit.
Breaking up damages the relationship. It’s either over or you get back together later. Neither prevents the hurt in the moment or the amount of sex had between. Why not engage the feelings and deal with the difficulty that comes with that?
I can understand that you feel tense when meeting your ' best friend' and ex on these occasions. Your 'best friend' probably not your best friend. But they were both free to do what they wanted to. I'm sorry, but this is a “you-problem”. You cannot expect your friends to cut of other friends because you feel uncomfortable when you see them during gatherings.
I think you need therapy to process your feelings regarding the breakup and your 'best friend' fucking your ex. Go NC with your 'best friend' and your ex and maybe skip the friend group gatherings while you heal.
We didn’t live together until after we got married. I didn’t really catch on right away when we got married either. I would think oh maybe I made a mistake. It took longer than it should have for me to realize, no, he is just straight up lying.
It’s stupid silly things. Like not washing a pot and putting it away and saying he did wash it. Little things I just let go and thought maybe he did and just missed spots no big deal. Over time I would see it more and more. He would make me feel crazy sometimes before I caught on.
Nah anyone who thinks a career is disgusting, degrading, and not worth respect yet still patronizes them is an asshole and the one not deserving respect.
If you don’t respect their job, but your actions where your mouth is.
he admitted that he did show my pictures to him and I told them those were private and were only meant for him to see.
If nothing else (even the age gap), this should have told you everything you needed to know, along with his friends asking if they could “have a go” like you're a bicycle.
He's using you and sharing your intimate photos with all his buddies.
C'mon, you're smarter than this.
I’m sorry OP but the advice you want doesn’t exist. You and your bf are profoundly incompatible and I’m not talking about your ages. He has a kid, you don’t want kids, you don’t want to parent. He thinks you should get used to it, you think your living environment is not suitable for kids. I just don’t see how your relationship can work long term when disagree already on such key life issues. Ultimately, it depends on what you can live with and what you’re willing to accept in order to make your relationship work. Only you can decide that. I wish you luck in figuring it out, I know it’s not easy for you.
Reach!
Start the conversation by asking him, “you know how you got a vasectomy 5 years ago, did you go to the follow up testing appointment a few months following to make sure it actually worked? Because I have it on pretty good authority that the vasectomy was not 100% effective.”
This is way more common than you’d think. Especially with men who don’t do the follow up to check the vasectomy was 100% effective.
It would explain why he downplays your relationship to his coworkers
How?
Wait till you have been together for a year or longer.
That way you can judge if he is a keeper. If you tell him now and he dumps you he might tell everyone.
Right now your in the early stages of dating.