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Janice, 22 y.o.
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On-line Live Sex Chat rooms Janice
Date: October 31, 2022
AmateurPub
If you stay with him you need to keep separate finances forever and also permanently keep him from knowing your social security number and your children's social security numbers, or whatever the equivalent is if you are not in the US. If he knows them, he will take loans and credit cards out in all your names and destroy your credit. You'd also need a pre nup stating that all debts he incurs during your marriage are his and remain his sole and separate obligation, so you aren't on the hook for paying them.
It would be better to leave him, but if you stay without taking precautions he will destroy your life.
But there are people in this thread for instance that agrees with him, that you are not entitled to your partners emotional support in an unreasonable amount at least.
I agree that in a relationship you should always want to be there for eachother. I also agree that you should have the right to put up boundaries for this sort of thing, maybe especially in the case of clinical level diagnoses as in my case (general anxiety disorder), no person is a ”emotional dumpster” for the other one. But like where is the line drawn? I can see both sides of the story which of course makes it hot.
Add to this that I love this person, add on top of that a whole lot of emotional neglect trauma from my childhood and that I have a really hard time deciphering what is normal and not in any given relationship. I struggle in ALL relationship, which means that I am never sure wheter it is the other person or me that is the issue. Should I change? Is he just a shitty person or he actually putting up reasonable and healthy boundaries and I am the toxic one? Honestly I have no idea, I have no blueprint for this sort of thing. Therefore, it is a bit more complicated than ”simple”, as I simply don’t know what the right thing to do is here. As I said, I struggle in every relationship in my life, and no I don’t talk only about romantic ones (and yes I go to therapy) but the option is having zero relationships at all and that of course isn’t really healthy at all. I am really trying my best here but I lack guidance, which is why I write on reddit
Make a list of every other relationship you have ever had, friends, family. Then start listing every good thing about every single one of them. Eventually you will stop thinking about her so much.
My husband and I split everything and this wouldn't be OK in either of our books. You laid down your boundary and he isn't a fully contributing partner, why exactly you keeping someone around you that likes to disrespect you? And he has money to go out but not to help with rent?