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Date: October 18, 2022
im trying to do that right now, though i cant see her yet since im sick and have been staying home. thank you so much for the advice and actually taking the time to view this from my side
Straight out just ask him if the money you owe him can be his contribution for rent and groceries so you dont have to pay him back. The fact that he keep rubbing how low his bills are in your face while he knows you cant afford yours is a red flag hes using you.
Wow 53 years that's amazing . It's sad that marriages don't last like this anymore I have a couple I get calls from quite often and have been doing work for them for about 10 years they are gave been married for 76 years that's what love is . Second time around was actually a better Marrage than my first my first marriage was longer and we were young but my second was everything the first was missing . But was short lived we went to Las Vegas one weekend and just happened to get married was only together for a year . Then about 2 1/2 years later we found out she had cancer after that it went downhill fast.
it's nude to watch someone you care so much for go from healthy to nothing in 6 months . After that I spent 11 years with a woman I had. Known since I was about 10 years old but had children from previous marriages but I think we got together for all the wrong reasons I loved her she did me but it was just to early to get into another long term she wasn't working I was fine with that I gave her a nice car to drive freedom to do whatever she wanted . Money to have just in case . She worked 3 days out of 11 years and those were working for me I couldn't handle it I put her inside just cleaning blinds shades , whatever just wiping things lfs down run the vacuum and payed her $25 an hour got home and she was mad wanted me to pay her $10 more an hour . I thought no body gets paid $35 an hour to vacuum . I did pay her just to. Keep the peace but never offered more work . And she had her adult son coming over wanting to stay at my house no job either 24 years old no goals in life other than smoking pot. That was it right there ended it for everyone
You want to rebuild trust? Are you fcking serious?
He's obviously in love with his ex and would leave you in a minute if she wanted him back. Actually, it sounds like he'd leave the second another financially stable person showed interest. C'mon you know this.
Grow a gd spine and dump this loser. I literally don't and will never understand ppl like you. Is being alone truly that much more terrifying than having to deal with losers like this for the long term?
You wanna know why he does this?
It's easier to manipulate people when you don't care about them. You've been letting him get away with it repeatedly and showed you don't respect yourself. Why should he?
This is an issue between your GF and her mom. She needs to sort her mom out or make a decision about how to handle her. What's her plan?
You need to decide if you can be happy with the influence your GF's mom has over your GF. You want years of this? What happens if/when you have children? She will have plenty of impact because your GF isn't handling it.
It doesn't matter what you do because the issue really isn't about you.
Dear, you have some deep seated trauma that's clearly coming out over OP's personal experience. You are not giving any form of advice, your just stating a RUN AWAY WITHOUT DEALING WITH ANYTHING. Your speaking so hardcore in black and white that it's painful.
It's doubtful that OPs boyfriend is the “way you attempt to describe him, you don't know either of these people or the details of the event. All your doing is adding HES a HORNY MALE HES A DOG.
OP has developed a feeling of WAS I assaulted or NOT by her wording. More then likely because of dwelling/over thinking. An ACTUAL form of advice, (since you CLEARLY feel like you need to tell people how to live/handle things), would be to tell the young adult who is just starting to figure things out and understand the world, who still has several years of mental development, to go to a therapist with her bf to actually sort out her feelings. There are psychiatry apps that are actually quite reasonably priced if your unable to find something local.
You are unhappy in your relationship, that is more than enough to leave. She may be cheating, or she may be asexual. I don't think going through her socials us that big of deal honestly. However you do not need it.
What will happen if you find nothing? What brilliant idea will you come up with to sabotage your relationship just, because your spinr us made of jelly?
It’s over. Just ended and move on. Why ? You both can’t turn each other on , two bodies living in a house.
Gathering from your post, my assumption is that your BF studied with a girl and you're not taking it too fondly. You feel like it crosses boundaries and others think otherwise.
Is that accurate?
Really, you're allowed to set whatever boundaries you want. However, its up to the other person if they want to uphold them. If those boundaries are crossed and you choose to stay in that relationship, you've become the one at fault.
My rule of thumb is: If you have to hide something from me, then you probably shouldn't be doing it.
Beyond that, I find that delivering a whole list of can and can not's, is exhausting to deal with and changes the relationship from romance into maintenance.
My partner gets my undivided trust until she gives me reasons to doubt.
I'd rather have my relationship structured where you're free to do whatever you want. I'll just pay attention and decide if your natural behaviour is what I am looking for. Uncontrolled, no restrictions, in sync, a natural fit.
Also, after spending a lot of time on this subreddit, I have found some people mask controlling behavior and label it as a boundary. Then they puff their chest like they're in the right:
My boundary is that I expect my GF to be home by 8 every night, call me on the hour, respect what I say, have location services on, impromptu phone checks, delete males of social media.
I get to set these because boundaries are considered “healthy”.
Those aren't boundaries… that's control.
So, arriving at that conclusion. I think its more appropriate to set boundaries on yourself, and then decide if the way your partner acts naturally is what you're looking for.
When I think about it, I don't even think the word boundary popped into conversation once in my current 5 year. Everything was a natural fit and be both exist freely. If you need to change your partner, should you even be with them?
So she went to the hospital
If they found drugs MAYBE stay , if not RUN!