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play tits [Multi Goal]
Date: October 10, 2022
AmateurPub
AmateurPub
play tits [Multi Goal]
I understand why people would be upset that their spouse did not involve them in the discussion. But I am just flabbergasted at how extreme their reactions are.
Easy: don't do it. 1) They will never leave. 2) It will ruin your marriage.
OP is worse than a Karen. Whan an absolutely insufferable stuck up human being. Get a hobby and some meaningful stuff to do in your life and leave your poor neighbour alone.
How do I have the conversation that I need to start putting the focus on myself for the health of the relationship and my sanity?
I don't know if there's any coming back from this. She's super entitled and thinks you'll do anything for her. And that's how it was in the beginning/until you realized how selfish she is. Maybe tell her to up her effort or you'll be focusing more on yourself because the relationship is one-sided.
She mentioned that he hasn't watched porn for months and only wanted to do that again because she is no longer available, how is he an addict?
So he’s one of these “Christians” who picks and chooses what parts of the fairy story he believes in.
Aren’t you living in sin because you’re not married?
Aren’t you vile fornicators because you’re having a child out of wedlock?
Ask him how he reconciles your situation with his “religiousness”? Or is hypocrisy ok so long as his needs are being met?
I can understand being confused by heteronormative and homophobic culture. What I don't understand is how someone could be gay/lesbian (rather than bi or pan) the whole time if they were for years was in a loving, deeply intimate and physical relationship, genuinely and wholeheartedly, with a spouse of the opposite sex. If they weren't in that kind of relationship then why did they make their partner feel like it was real?
I'm European (Balkan) and multigenerational homes are pretty normal and very common here. I'm not saying every multigenerational home will work or is a good idea. It all depends on each member and all of their relationships with each other. But to me it's insanity when I read people be very ignorant to others living with parents. Here it's normal, you can live! during uni or until you're married in your family home. You can always go back home after divorce or inability to self support – especially now during the insane inflation. We also don't move homes so often and plenty of people outright own where they on-line in, for example my home was built by my great grandparents. So when I hear people advise adults to force their children to pay rent and bills as soon as they're 18, those who advise others just “cut contact, move and find a new job” as if it's that easy (abusive and harmful situations aside!) – cultural differences are big, but this feels like a new world entirely.
This is a flat-out dealbreaker. He's a loser asshole who sees you as nothing more than a sex object and gives fuck all about the risk to your health and well-being. Dump him.
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Who knows it could even be both! (Again, thinking of some particular relatives of mine.) But OP definitely, definitely needs some therapy.
Block her from contacting you.
As a mother I’ll chime in.
You may want to ask r/divorce or there’s some other subreddit that supports people who have been cheated on. You could also ask parenting subs or something.
The commenters here tend to skew young and never had kids. Kids are a game changer. Detonating the nuclear family is not a great first resort. Therapy might be good for you to figure things out but I personally wouldn’t make a huge kneejerk reaction- it would destabilize the home for the kids.
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Ok. So record her being toxic over the next 6 months. Take this to a judge. Get your kid. Leave.
Hes definitely trying to control you. No ifs ands or butts.
Not worth it IMO, life is too short to not do what you want.
Also, its healthy for couples to do things separately, for him to say “parties arent for people in relationships” is asinine. He just wants to keep tabs on you. He should want you to spend time with your friends and vice versa.
If he doesnt trust you thats HIS fault.
Idk, but if I were you I'd reevaluate your relationship.
I spent many years with someone like your BF, eventually I did things on my own after years of missing out because he “didnt want to go and I wasnt allowed to go without him.” Why TF should I miss out on memories and friendships because someone else told me no ? F that.
My thing with your comment is that many of the questions you asked seemed irrelevant to the rape accusation in my opinion. -It shouldn’t matter how long they’re dating nor how recent she wanted condoms -She shouldn’t have to provide a reason to justify her anxiety surrounding condoms. – Essentially I understand the question “why didn’t you stop” but again, him not letting her get the condom says enough as to why OP perhaps didn’t stop; he’s controlling. -He also doesn’t need to understand why she’s anxious nor why it is a really big deal.
A rape accusation here is “simple”: Did the person know he the action was non consensual and did he proceed anyway. He (physically?) stopped her from getting the product that would’ve made this intercourse consensual.
The loan isn't going to be solved by a lawyer. He she cosigned and didn't make sure payments were made. She owes. It does really matter that he lied in the eyes of the law. This is what cosign means. She agreed to pay if he doesn't.
You can't get out of being a cosigner when the first party doesn't pay.
However for the custody/child support, yes the lawyer would help.
She could try to sue him for the money she's going to have to pay for the loan, though that likely will get tossed out. She could get him to sign a loan directly to her with a payment plan (and get it notarized) to show he has the responsibility to pay it back. She'd be stuck to those terms though. If he ever didn't make a payment then she could sue for the money, but he could file bankruptcy.
Basically, don't cosign for anything you're not completely willing to pay for on your own.
SHE IS NOT READY FOR RELATIONSHIPS
SHE NEEDS THERAPY and work on her triggers.
Break up.
Ehh I mean I'm best friends with my ex and it doesn't get in the way of my romantic relationship. It's not always an issue
You said you “broke it off”. In the US that’s the same as breaking up.
Not exactly mad, but hurt. He hasn’t provided for a year, just the three months I couldn’t not work because I was in a cast. I am now in a boot from a different but have returned to work regardless because I highly value relationships being as equal as possible and I don’t love that he’s shouldered most of the finances while I was down. But comparatively, he has a full-timed salaried job and two degrees while I’m finishing up mine and working barely 20hrs a week. I tell him all the time that he gets a gold star for being a great provider, but being a sugar daddy is not being a partner. Partners help you tackle your conflicts, validate your feelings, and do what is necessary as a part of an individual’s support system. I feel like I blindly give that to him, especially bc lately I have not been able to step up with money. But from his end, I just get handed a $20 and expect that to resolve all the turmoil.
there’s never a good time for it. do it now.
Yes. Even if she wants to keep that baby and is pro life she has to understand the father of the baby will always be somehow present in her life. He's manipulative now, he'll continue to be like this in the future and will use the baby against her. There's so many stories about women having kids with abusive men and then these men continue to torment them even 10 years after splitting up…
It sounds to me like you’re seeing things that aren’t there. Texting you about her experience in a new country doesn’t necessarily qualify as ‘flirty’ texts. Nothing from this post would lead me to believe that she has feelings for you, other than platonic.
Regarding your original question, some people simply just prefer to keep their love life and social life separate — even from close friends. Chances are she’s just one of those people. I wouldn’t read into it.
Overall, it sounds like you’re just somebody she vibes with.
No chaser huh? Given it to me straight. I respect it.
You are right. I fucked up. I see that now, as I said in previous comment, the whole time it was happening I didn't see it.
The 10 year relationship was only my second gf ever and I lost sight of what was important. No excuses from me, it's to late for that. My immature mindset of “feeling in love” over shadowed what love is.
The only thing to do now is own it, learn from it, grow, and do better next time.
Thank you for your insight and directness. You have been very insightful and helpful!
I really recommend you take this a sign to focus on yourself and your happiness. Be a little selfish. I don't know you so I can't really recommend much but if you are constantly at home or with your children make the conscious decision to treat yourself to some time away. This is your life and your happiness should be a main priority.
What should I do?
Go out with your friend, talk to her about your current situation – if he does not want you to be in contact with her, is it maybe because she could be an exemple of being happier single than poorly paired? Do a pregnancy test, and if you are pregnant, I would suggest abortion in order to be able to do a clean break from him. Get a lawyer and begin the divorce process. Maybe question the validity of belonging to a church that perpetuate the very same patriarchy by which your present life is ruled. Talk to a therapist about the fact that you already knew this relationship was not good for you and still decided to marry and what it tells you about how you feel about yourself and what you think you deserve.
What can I say?
Anything you want as it does not seem to matter to him, but I would suggest nothing until the divorce proceedings are in motion. He seems like the kind of person who will completely fly off the handle the minute he realize he is not in control anymore. If you already had children, he would use them to hurt you.
their neglect caused the undeveloped/regressed state of the twins in the first place
how?
Sometimes it’s best not to bring another being to this world, especially if parents aren’t both on same page. I’d whatever you do start birth control afterwards asap. I’m female and my opinion has always been: unless you plan on having the kid don’t tell him unless what your looking for is hurting the guy; he can’t do anything except hope you change your mind. There are women whose partner insist on an abortion even when she wants to have. OP you’re lucky to have a supportive bf
Sometimes it’s best not to bring another being to this world, especially if parents aren’t both on same page. I’d whatever you do start birth control afterwards asap. I’m female and my opinion has always been: unless you plan on having the kid don’t tell him unless what your looking for is hurting the guy; he can’t do anything except hope you change your mind. There are women whose partner insist on an abortion even when she wants to have. OP you’re lucky to have a supportive bf
Considering she’s been lying for 6 years…yeah…doesn’t look great
She would dump your ass as soon as the baby born. Wtf is wrong with you? Get therapy, this is insane, they are only using you and your wife is the worst
every time I see these age gaps I sigh out loud.
Leave us alone.
It absolutely DOES NOT matter why he’s saying this. You can’t marry this man or he will only get worse, I promise you. This is not the end, if you marry him you will be in for a lifetime of this and it will be even harder to escape. This is your best chance to run, take it.
Of course not. Why are you asking that?
OP you did nothing wrong. You protected her from getting into a troubling situation both socially and legally. She sounds narcissistic and controlling and disrespectful to you and has no concept of the true value in having you in her life. You need to re-evaluate your relationship weighing pros and cons leaving the emotional attachment out of equation. This will give you a clearer picture whether you want to continue being with her. I wouldn’t personally continue listening to her drunken guard down truthful thoughts. You can do better.
Maybe it’s because he is 18 tf. You act like every 18 year old can last for hours bruh most 18 yr olds are still virgins not everyone can last longer instantly it literally takes time to learn
Give a man a fish vs. teach a man to catfish.
So how would them being sent directly to you with consent from the girl herself be WORSE than you getting floated them through a network where nobody even knows how they were accessed in the first place?