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HOT NAKED OIL SHOW ? [400 tokens remaining]
Date: October 26, 2022
AmateurPub
AmateurPub
HOT NAKED OIL SHOW ? [400 tokens remaining]
Sounds like she may have and is looking for a way to feel better about it.
Any advice is welcome haha. Unfortunately a lot of men whatever age just aren’t mature, yes that’s my issue. I said to him im just going to be imagining every scenario possible that could’ve happened and as much as I believe he has definitely never done it before, once is still enough I guess
Also Why Does He Do That by Lundy Bancroft. It’s free live
No reason not to split date, trips etc. Just choose something you can conformably afford. But since you seem to feel that this shouldn't be the case then just walk away now instead of the relationship progressing. It won't (and shouldn't) change if you live together
If it's a great work opportunity, you should go, and she decides if she ever decide to break up with you or not.
Talk to her about her insecurities and that you will be back. If you decide to move for good, then you need to break up with her, she doesn't want to move, and that's ok.
Yes I told her there will be an opportunity to go and I feel like I’d like to apply, she say try it and we will se although until I found out that I’m going she never told me she would want to break up. Yeah we did once and we both said we wouldn’t want to have long distance relationship, although I also mentioned that if she would have to go for work purposes for sometime I wouldn’t have problem with that.
Exactly, throwing an engagement party feels like a job for someone in the wedding party.
Good job I didn't say that loads of sex workers are happily married to their pimps then lol
I would Point Blake ask him why he would spend the rest of his life with you but why he would not get married to you. Depending on his answer you're going to have to make a decision: are you going to stay with him and just not get married, or are you going to leave and find someone who is willing to get married.
Sounds like he has commitment issues, possibly could stem back to childhood. Obviously I know nothing about this person so I can’t say. Do you think the issue is that he doesn’t want to be “tied down”? My boyfriend told me the same thing after 6 years, and while I don’t want to get married now. I DO want to get married someday. This might not be something you can change and you’ll have to decide if this is your dealbreaker. My DMs are open girl.
Actually it's the one important thing that can break apart people
You don't get everything. It's unrealistic to think that your person is simultaneously spend large chunks of his time with you and then be able to provide for a family with you. The man you want has no hobbies, or friends, and no particular ambition. As I describe the man that could fulfill your inherent desire for top priority, do you think you honestly want that?
You are Lois Lane who doesn't love Clark Kent, but loves Superman. Then when she is with Superman for she wishes he were more like Clark Kent. She doesn't recognize that Clark is superman nor is she able to accept either individual as being “good enough” for her love.
You must pick the parts you want and deal with the consequences of what you wanted. You want ambition from a man, then you're going to deal with him prioritizing his time somewhere else than yourself. If you want a man who wants to spend all his time with you, then you're not going to get a man who wants to build things. Tradeoffs exist because there is no pure trait. Think of the yin yang, there is no darkness without light and no light without darkness. That is how traits work. A kind and giving soul tends to be kind and giving to everyone rather than just one. Ambition= someone ends up as not the top priority. Success= pride which leads to the fall. There is no man who will meet every quality you want, and even if there were, he'd have so many tradeoffs that I sincerely doubt you'd want him because in order for him to exist as you'd want, he'd have to have multiple personalities all tailored to show themselves just when you want them. And then you're dealing with a whole other set of issues right?
It wasn’t me being facetious, it was just an answer to the question.
So then either leave or recognize gift giving isn't his thing.
There's not really any other options.
You're talking as someone that either (1) thinks giving $600 worth of gifts to a new partner is normal or (2) wants a pat on the back for it for comparing it to what he got (which honestly is normal for new relationship).
Neither option paints you in a good light. I get being upset about the lack the rest of the year, but pick an option and move on instead of complaining about it.
First of all, if you're already talking about the wedding, you *have* proposed. Second: don't marry her.
all i can say is i have a feeling you’re overrating yourself with that 6 because your attitude towards women makes you a 1
Definitely the comment of a secure, reasonable, mature man. Definitely.
If he isn’t capable of treating you as an equal then it’s not a good relationship to invest in.
He is literally treating her as an equal.
She chose this apartment. Her trying to burden him with her poor decision making makes her the bad partner, not him.
Thx
No excuse for her blowing up at a little girl who lost her mom
I showed the pets my relatives have since we’re both animal lovers, the souvenirs i bought for him & his family, spending time with cousins i havent seen in years, won a raffle (lol), some funny stories from my relatives etc
I actually didn’t insinuate he should gift the gf and not the friends? Or that men should be buying women gifts? You are the one connecting those dots and building that narrative. My perspective is it’s all or none. If you are really taking my original two sentence comment so personally and making it into something “deeply sexist” then you are projecting your own feelings about sexism and money into this thread. You literally came on here to attack versus try to explain the other viewpoint like a normal person. If you like giving gifts to people, more power to ya.
I was just gonna say it sounds like a kink thing to me! Not rhat that excuses his abusive behaviour at all. And if OP developed anxiety from his actions then it us defenitely assault, yea.
OP, get out while you can!
thank you , i will have to develop the courage to speak about it and once i will i will suggest everything you said. Massive thanks
I'd point out to him how uncomfortable you were with the offer and that you told him immediately after it happened. I'm sure you didn't do anything to make them think you were interested. I've known women in open marriages, and they are usually extremely forward with other women. Your neighbor probably had a few more glasses of wine and thought it was a great idea.
You both should listen to each other’s opinions, feelings and needs, but that means when in conflict, each person’s feelings should be treated as just as important, not more than, not less than, but just as important. So one side shares their perspective, receives validation, then the other side shares and gets the same. After that, solutions that work for both are explored and then implemented. You want a partner and want to be a partner that looks for win/win solutions, not one who looks to win at the others expense.
You know, there are days when you come home from work and all you want is silently sit on the couch looking to a blank wall for a while or play a game or two to relax a bit. Yet she expects me to come home all smiled up
This just sounds like you’re an introvert and she’s an extrovert, here again it’s about finding solutions and compromises you both can live with, not one person being right the other wrong.
She always finds a scapegoat (in my eyes).
That one’s more problematic. Sometimes though people are raised to communicate frustration via blame, so maybe ask her instead of blaming, to say she’s frustrated and ask for help. If she’s willing to work on that, and you’re willing to validate and empathize with her frustration that habit can change. But if she’s always blaming others, sooner or later that habit will be used against you and that’s a huge red flag and not someone you want in your life.
He may need treatment. You need to talk to your gyn about it. He needs to go to a doctor too and tell them the problem. Him wearing isn’t fixing the problem it’s just a band aide.
This is not your fault. You could have never known your friend is a pos until prior. I’m sorry this happened. He’s a pos too. More so cus he’s preying on girls almost half his age.
She’s 21 right now, we don’t know when the relationship started, 21 is best case scenario. If it started in 2020 when she was around more, she could have been 18/19, if it was before that, even younger, and him 35/36 when they started dating, and has known her for years before that (OP states he’s known her as long as he’s dated her sister. They’ve been married ten years, so she was younger than 11 when they first met).
A duck who repeatedly points out that we are only casual. Talks to other people on dating apps etc…
Did I miss something or are you just assuming op is a female?
That's what it's like for everyone. What exactly did doctors tell her?
My only thing is that she asked him how he felt about it, like is he just supposed to say “it doesnt matter to me” like ffs if I'm asking someone how they feel about something I do want an actual answer.
When will you become offline mom
Honestly it's so easy for someone who isn't in it to say things about your relationship so not trying to be too much. With that, I think you shouldn't tell someone to shut the fuck up when they have an issue with you. Ideally hear them out and let them know you care about their feelings and are sorry… I don't know what's going on with her, if she can't deal owning that she was aggressive and in the wrong or if this is a pattern. But I dont think you should feel too bad about reacting.
He said there’s something wrong with me and I’m unhealthy for thinking he wouldnt be interested in other women. Maybe not flat out cheating, but being full on INTERESTED? Attraction is one thing, but interested in other women while you’re with someone monogamously? And to say that’s how humans work, that there is no human who can just be interested in one person? It makes my heart break so much 🙁 I know I can be interested in just one person.
I think you have bigger problems than buying her a new laptop. Your wife needs anger management therapy and possibly financial counseling.
Women can have their periods months into pregnancy.
You are no longer compatible if this is going on after 3 years. Can you imagine this for the next 50 years? Don’t commit yourself to a sexless life. Cut her loose and find someone better for you. She would be unreasonable to expect you to be ok with a sexless relationship. And there is no “fixing” this
This would be a deal breaker for me, simply because she gave it to you on purpose and her attitude and response was IMO hateful
It's not weird. If you discussed labels and mutually agreed on them, which you did, then it's okay to use the labels. Some people casually date multiple people for a while (or just one person casually for a while) and one person thinks they're a boyfriend while the other sees them as not exclusive yet. Those people would need to have a talk. You guys talked and decided you were exclusive, and were bf/gf. You're all set. If you feel it's too soon though and are concerned just talk to him about it again.
Yes, I’m angry.. wouldn’t you be if you saw blatant sexism destroys good person?
While I like the vibe of this, I don't think it's practical in reality. Yes, OP needs to make it absolutely clear that she can't be a SAHM for another child – but he's only going to be inconvenienced if she stops doing stuff now, and her children will be the ones who suffer.
If she stops cleaning things will probably be fine (for a while). If she stops providing food, he can easily order out or buy things for himself – the children can't, though. Ditto with shopping. And if she tells him he has to take care of the kids, there's no way to enforce that. If he goes to work, or out with friends, or whatever…what's she going to do, leave her children home alone? Not pick them up from school? It doesn't sound like their welfare is going to be a big deal to him, and it's not their fault their father is being a jerk. They're not old enough to look after themselves, their father may well use them as ammunition against OP, and OP loves her children. If there's a game of chicken over who looks after the kids, OP will crack first – because she cares about their wellbeing, she won't let them be harmed, and I bet he knows that and is more than ready to use it against her.
Break up with her. Sorry but you’re both young and you are incredibly insecure and immature. If this is how you are, your relationship is doomed and will end badly for you.
It’s not the advice you wanted to hear but it’s the reality. Your way of thinking is, quite frankly, idiotic to the point I’d be worried you had a brain tumour.
Not only that but they spent the day (and evening clubbing) together only while the bf was gone for a full week on a business trip
unleashed giraffe?
Laughs in Maasai
The age difference means that you would be a caregiver at 53 at least. He got married. Twice. He absolutely told them he loved them. This isn’t your future husband.
Even my 18 year old grandson thought the sex scene at Joffrey’s casket was rape and it was between his parents who were also brother and sister. But the show is also full of torture, cruelty and carnage. Definitely not the same as Stranger Things. Just tell him you can love him without watching this show.
You seem very strongly against accepting the idea that you’ve been naive and tricked by this woman, because you think she’s “incredible.” It’s easy to think the people you date are wonderful people when you’re not out of the honeymoon phase yet. She has multiple baby daddies and while I’m not judging her for that it does say something about her as a person—she’s either intentionally trying to get pregnant to men or she has a habit of unsafe sexual practices, which is immature and reckless on her part.
From your previous post and this one it seems clear that she’s intentionally trying to get pregnant and that this shouldn’t be shocking to you. You did the do with no condom and while it mean you’re extremely naive, it is what it is. So now you have to actually walk in the big boy shoes you decided to put on too early. Enjoy it the best you can. Raising kids sucks and it’s gonna suck more when you’re raising a group of other mens’ kids on top of it, because she’s definitely going to push for you to treat her kids like equals (like any person with previous kids would do).
The important issue here is that you need to be conscious of the fact this child will exist because of YOUR decisions and YOUR stupidity. It isn’t the child’s fault it will exist. Don’t put blame on it because of your crappy choices and force them to bare a burden that isn’t theirs. Try to be a good parent and teach them to be better than you and their mom so they don’t repeat your mistakes or her’s.
” I don’t feel good enough even though he says he loves me”
Unless he chooses porn over intimacy with you, thats a 100% you problem, and you should go to therapy to fix it. If it is the other way around, he may be addicted and he needs to fix it , also via therapy most probably.
Either way, its on you to keep a relationship with a person that outright lies to your face, and skips boudaries that you put up.
As a sidenote, while it's valid to have that boundary up, I find it pretty toxic… consuming port does not mean that he's going to become an addict, neither that hes wanting to have sex like in the porn he watches… these days people attribute to porn a lot of bad things but the problem comes down to the people that consumes it and its inhability to separate fiction from reality.
Take it to HR. Probably just trying to get sympathy sex.
Yeah i’m not going back to delete everything lol
It sounds like you have given this marriage three to six months for this to turn around.
He didn’t even make plans. It was an ice-cream date. It would have taken an hour to two hours tops.
He choose the company of his male friend over ice-cream, wife, and possible sexy time.
You don’t need it to be a holiday for an ice-cream date in today’s day and time. Hell, you can make them at home if you can’t go out.
That wasn’t a plan it was an agreement to spend time together.
A plan is “I’ve gotten tickets to…”
Unless he sees a problem then he’s not changing. You can’t build a relationship and life with this behaviour.
What does he say about his behaviour? Why does he think it’s okay? Why does he think you will stay?
You are in a relationship with the person you wished he was.
Forcing an attempt at intimacy every two weeks.
24/26 something popped up that nixed the attempt before the kids were even in bed, the other two times she voiced that she was able to not tense up and enjoy it, but both those intimate moments were closer to teenagers making out in a movie theater than what I’d view as being completely intimate.
Don’t get me wrong, I know it’s going to take time to right the relationship, and that intimacy is a spectrum and I was appreciative of her effort to be open to trying, it just all seems like wasted emotion if she’s pulling out what is probably one of the most impressive “sorry I have a headache,” I’ve ever been made aware of.
The irony is because the culture at large and most people respects guys with a long history of bedding lot's of women, but penalize and look down on women for the same thing….probably because it is super easy for a woman to get laid. Any woman could go to a bar tonight and probably have sex with someone. Then go back to the bar and have sex with someone else. Basically have sex with as many men as she had time for. It would take a similar looking man weeks (months?) to find a woman that would go home with him for sex.
Reddit LOVES to hate men who are traditionally masculine though (those who seek adventure, sex, and violence) , so that is probably why you are seeing this.
Yes – yes you can break up with him. Si se puede!!!
You're dating an asshole. ?
Not really. I'm saying it's ok to not want kids. But I totally get that I got sidetracked and probably missed my own point…
Also, I was not so willingly ready to give it away to someone I was in a relationship with for a short time. I was very hesitant to give it away and did not go through with it, but even if I had, there’s nothing wrong with that
Run, leave now. You’re with a guy who finds rape jokes funny and thinks Nazis are cool. I know 13 year olds who know better. This guy is a loser. Imagine how mature he’s going to be if you have a child together or how much support he’s going to give you if you go through something difficult. Being alone might be frightening but staying with this guy is a slow path to nowhere. You can do so much better.
I just wanted clarification as to why he posted that, and he said that it doesn’t matter, that my feelings are not important to him anymore. But then, after response, he walked up to me, gave me a hug, which was actually sincere, and assured me that this wasn’t my fault, that life got in the way, between school, work, other things I have going on, I have other health concerns as well, and he said it just didn’t work. It’s not a bad thing, we have good times, we had good memories, but it’s time to move on.
It seems like he already has.
I understand his point in that Tom is a complete asshat and Sami is being incredibly foolish and taken advantage of. But if anything what Sami needs is help escaping her sham marriage, and none of you should be exposing yourselves to his Tom’s obvious toxicity. So the obvious answer is to convince Sami to leave him and remain friends with Sami while cutting out Tom.
Need to know: why is your cousin in the wrong?
He never gave it a chance. I mean yeah, we saw each other maybe once or twice a week, but we would go out for dinner, go to hockey game, something like that. Apparently he didn’t like that either.
Exactly: which is why you broke up.
You’re too busy for a relationship. He told you this. The effort you put in was minimal/not sustainable. So you broke up. You were planning vacations without him and giving him the “left over” time you had. I saw your Disney vacay comments and that you go 3-4 times a damn year.
You do not get to question why he’s happy now he’s single. You do not get to be upset that he’s enjoying his life. You do not get anything from him. And involving your parents in stalking his social media gives another reason as to why he was right to block your crazy ass. LEAVE HIM ALONE. You are not in his life anymore. You are owed nothing.
I came here just to see the “what should I do” at the bottom ?
I meant in the moment. I can’t believe it wasn’t step one after discovering she’d done it.
Tf
This is some terrible advice here. Sneak around looking into it? If you need to do that, why be in a relationship at all?
Consider talking to him about it more. Tell him it is bothering you. But an anonymous letter seems very suspect in the first place, like someone is just screwing with you guys.
And that short time when he was quiet? Sounds like he was having his own issues, but people have doubts. It's not suspicious that he spent some time quiet and said he doesn't feel appreciated. That sounds like looking for something.
I'd give him the benefit of the doubt and if it is bothering you, talk it out.
There are a bunch of YouTube videos about people who finally left the Q Anon cult and their personal stories. You might want to send her the links to the videos and get her reaction. To me, it comes down to the fundamental idea that they are the victims of huge government conspiracies. Playing the victim means you can blame someone else and never take responsibility for ones life because someone else did this to you. That's a big red flag.
Moving away how far a drive?
But it wasn’t her idea…It was HIS friends idea, for her to get naked…you can’t tell me this man didn’t have other intentions. And if he didn’t he sure gave off that vibe because again he gave her the idea. If it would have been her going to him, that’s still weird. because it’s your husbands friend. Why would you not think about how your significant other would feel about his friends seeing your goods? Just weird all the way around.
I'd just like to say that it's fine that he doesn't want the polyamory he was always gonna be my husband and if he said no I was always going to respect that
It really doesn't matter. You told him that because life has been difficult, maybe you guys should start sleeping with other people. That probably ruined any confidence he had in himself and any security in the relationship. You pretty much just said you'll settle for him, but really you'd have liked to sleep with other people.
If you two have always been in a monogamous relationship, then why in the world would you suddenly think this was a good idea?
It really doesn't appear as if you ever stopped and thought about how even merely suggesting this would make him feel and now you are holding words (that were cruel but almost understandable given the situation) he said out of hurt and betrayal against him and wondering how you will ever forgive him, how will you ever feel comfortable again and giving zero thought on how you can ever make him feel comfortable again or earn his forgiveness.
You are the one that screwed up here, not him.
Except the photographer is the husband's friend. She'd have to be exceptionally stupid to not realize his friend seeing her very hot would make him uncomfortable. It would 100% be different if it had been a professional photographer that the husband didn't know. But doing this with his FRIEND very much makes her in an idiot.
Being in a creative field and trying to make a career of it requires an insane amount of dedication and time.
It sounds like he is not in a place where he has the time to do justice to a relationship or his SO. It's upto you to decide if you are okay taking second or no place in this relationship. Even if you support him there's no guarantee that he'll acknowledge it later. So, it's upto you to stay or leave.
You’ve dated 3 mos. Even if you were exclusive it’s way too soon to be cohabitating.
She’s a user. And she’s manipulative and nasty when she doesn’t get her way.
She’s 29 and living with her mom. You really think she’s going to be paying rent and contributing if she moves in with you?
Don’t be a sucker.
Yes we plan on getting married within the next year..
You can't really change who she is and what she does. In the end it is her life and her body and if she wants to show off herself in lingerie than you can't really do much to stop that.
You can only decide whether this crosses a boundary for you, and come to accept that she is not the kind of partner you're looking for.
Honesty is the best policy for a reason. A basic let down along the lines of “I don't see us having a future together” is generally the best way to go.
Ending things when you lose feelings is not being an asshole. That's just being a normal, emotionally well adjusted human being. Stringing her along to get sex until you find someone else would be an asshole move.
His behaviour is a huge red flag. And I'm just saying, but if a guy tells you he “used” to be a player – thats already a red flag and you should walk away. Dont trust guys like that. He does not respect your boundaries. You should break up.