You intertwined your finances and he simply forgot to explain just how badly in debt he was? That seems like a pretty severe breach of trust, and he isn't making up for it by putting his full effort into saving and finding a job. Personally I would feel extremely used. You should be more angry than you are.
As someone who has used marijuana for pain managment before, my opinion is that it doesn't come close to having the impact that would make it unreasonable to quit or take a break to pass a drug test. Its a cop-out for the fact that he's addicted, probably using WAY more than is necessary, creating additional financial burden and losing job opportunities over his own lack of self discipline. This goes deeper than just being bad with money.
You have every right to expect more from him. These aren't easy conversations to have, especially since you care about him and he moved across the country for you – but you cant let your resentment build without saying anything. He needs to know that you're frustrated about all of it.
You showed her how you feel about her when she isn't doing what you want her to do or thinking what you want her to think. You don't think much of her at all. She won't be able to talk to you about life decisions going forward because you aren't trustworthy or safe to talk to. Trust is earned in drops and lost in buckets, and you kicked the bucket over last night. Your relationship may also have kicked the bucket as well.
That said, you want kids and she doesn't, so you may not be continuing forward anyway.
Sounds like you're too busy to have a gf. And apparently your band hobby is more important than spending time with her. Just break up
Tell her exactly this then kick her out and block her
You intertwined your finances and he simply forgot to explain just how badly in debt he was? That seems like a pretty severe breach of trust, and he isn't making up for it by putting his full effort into saving and finding a job. Personally I would feel extremely used. You should be more angry than you are.
As someone who has used marijuana for pain managment before, my opinion is that it doesn't come close to having the impact that would make it unreasonable to quit or take a break to pass a drug test. Its a cop-out for the fact that he's addicted, probably using WAY more than is necessary, creating additional financial burden and losing job opportunities over his own lack of self discipline. This goes deeper than just being bad with money.
You have every right to expect more from him. These aren't easy conversations to have, especially since you care about him and he moved across the country for you – but you cant let your resentment build without saying anything. He needs to know that you're frustrated about all of it.
Wow, your comments on your other post are even more concerning. Single White Female vibes…
You showed her how you feel about her when she isn't doing what you want her to do or thinking what you want her to think. You don't think much of her at all. She won't be able to talk to you about life decisions going forward because you aren't trustworthy or safe to talk to. Trust is earned in drops and lost in buckets, and you kicked the bucket over last night. Your relationship may also have kicked the bucket as well.
That said, you want kids and she doesn't, so you may not be continuing forward anyway.