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make me cum for you love, ♥ [1471 tokens remaining]
Date: October 18, 2022
AmateurPub
AmateurPub
make me cum for you love, ♥ [1471 tokens remaining]
Nothing sounds too weird about this. You might just be over thinking things.
Staying back on her first day might be explained by her being keen to learn or didn't want to appear lazy on her first day.
Gaps in messages are just how some people communicate online – might seem strange but that's just how they are 🙂
If you continue to try and “motivate her” you will do a lot of damage her self esteem and your relationship. Your job is to make her feel loved, beautiful, sexy, and the light of your life EXACTLY as she is. Trust me, she does NOT need you to tell her that her body isn’t what it was…she is ACUTELY aware of her extra weight and flaws and even more so, probably beats herself up over it a lot. If you do anything other than make her feel like a fucking goddess, then you are contributing to her self loathing.
If or when she decides to try and make changes, it Will come from within, not bc you point out her flaws. She will come to you if she wants advice. Otherwise, don’t offer any! When she complains about her body that’s not your cue to “motivate her”…it’s your cue to tell her everything you love about her and how damn sexy she is RIGHT NOW.
A well loved woman has so much power inside her and will usually rise to the occasion. Conversely, a woman always on the defensive will buck against that and dig her heels in (subconsciously usually). Your choice, mate.
Just ignore her silent treatment. Pretend like you didn't notice her ignoring you. Finally start saving for your own place.
RemindMe! 1 day
So having hot boundaries is different than forbidding?
These are the kind of stories make me hate love. You just can't trust anyone these days. Strength to you brother you did everything you could, She doesn't deserve a man like you. Be brave and listen to me, If you don't go to the gym, Start going. It'll help you, Trust me.
well i mean getting accused of hurting your partner is something that some people dont get past, its kinda a big deal to most that they are seen as abusers without any facts behind it
The mental professional isn't for you it's for her. Your GF tried to kill herself so obviously she needs mkre help than you can offer.
Yes you need help to vent and process but she actually needs help and you can't offer her that unfortunately
If that’s how he reacted to that, there’s clearly more issues with him. This doesn’t sound like his first fiasco, and honestly, leave. You deserve more than this manipulative dude
Anger is a big spectrum. You might feel 5% anger when she doesn't show you a picture one day. If you were to let her know then, it might look like you saying:
'Hey! You mentioned a picture you wanted to show me yesterday. What happened with that?'
If you leave it until she does it 20 times, you might feel 70% anger, which is far less easy to control. Expressing 70% anger might look like this:
'You never follow through. I'm sick of this. Do you even care about me?'
It can be really useful to learn to express your anger when it's small, instead of pretending it's not there and letting the pressure build up.
Good luck!
You met her only 5 moths ago. I know it hurts, but there's no way to know if someone can be “the one” in that short amount of time. I assure you, you will heal.
If he wanted to he would.
After 36 years he's pretty set in his ways. Actions speak louder than hollow words.
And?
This is the price you pay for not taking a chance by telling him how you felt when you started to feel more that platonic feelings for him. You can say that you’re just not the type of person to do that to deflect from your own responsibility for being in this situation, but you are who you decide to be. And I’m not trying to be harsh, I was the way you are when younger, and I regret not taking more romantic chances at that time of my life.
It seems this is probably rooted in self esteem, so it’s time to focus on that in therapy and be brutally honest with your therapist and don’t take their homework lightly. My only advice is to invest in yourself in ways that make you proud of yourself. There are things we can’t control, but what pride is there in being born lucky? It’s the things you can control and influence that you can be really proud of. And don’t compare yourself to other people, but against yourself.
For this specific situation, you actually owe him the truth, you need to put the ball in his court. You’re going to lose him if you do nothing, which is the same outcome if he doesn’t feel the same way about you. The poor guy probably thought you were out of his league and that you were only interested in him platonically and not romantically, so he kept his emotional defenses up with you. I’m not talking about writing him a love letter where you profess that he’s your soul mate, that would be inappropriate. But you need to tell him that the reason you’ve lashed out recently is that you realized, when he introduced his GF, that you have more than platonic feelings for him. Tell him that you need some space, both to process your own feelings so you can be just a friend and out of respect for him and GF and their relationship. Tell him that you’ll be asking for different projects at work for a while, and no personal communication. Tell him that you’re sorry that you didn’t handle this in a more healthy and honest way and wish him the best. After that, if he has feelings and wants to be with you, he’ll need time to break up with his GF and let you know how he feels.
Ok have a good night.
She knows her friend. Who are you to judge?
I think you should go with option #1. You two are old enough to have a mature conversation about this. Unfortunately, based on what you’ve written, it sounds to me like she doesn’t want to be romantically involved with you any more, but she likes receiving attention from you, and knows you are reliable when she’s in a bind. This is very one-sided and definitely unfair to you.
I have a hot time admitting when I need help or accepting help/kind gestures (even from my husband). I feel like I’ve been conditioned to take on the weight of everything myself. What I’ve come to realize is that the people who love you most will help you when you least expect it. You won’t have to ask for it. All you have to do is be grateful and love them for caring about you so much.
She’s your ex…you’re here asking about an ex. Maybe you should block her so you stop seeing her stuff?
You can't because it is weird. It's also super unethical.
So the “he settled for me” bit is just in your head. I’d accept his word that he didn’t settle and enjoy the relationship. Be more secure. The other relationship clearly wasn’t going anywhere which is probably why she ghosted him. If he isn’t upset about the other relationship ending, then there’s no issue here except your self confidence.
Imagine that, she’s a liar
I would tell him, he has a right to know what she’s up to and plan accordingly
I’d try to see if I can find him online and send him the receipts. Make his lawyers job a little easier
I’ve suggested it, she’s not interested. I’m not going to drag her kicking and screaming into it; I think that if she wanted to fight for us she’s had plenty of chances over the last few years and she’s never showed up.
I’m 29F and my bf is 30M, and I still have to deal with his overprotective/manipulative mother, grandmother, and aunt. All the women on his side of the family are super intrusive, but claim it comes from a loving/nurturing place. Nope, they have irrational anxieties and jealousy issues.
My bf has a very hot time setting boundaries with his family because he grew up in that environment. He lets them guilt him into doing all kinds of things for them, and they don’t even appreciate it and will belittle him any chance they get. This, unfortunately, is a very common dynamic in Hispanic households.
I’m also Hispanic, so I am familiar with that type of behavior. Luckily for me, I grew up very independent and don’t tolerate their shenanigans. I only interact with my bf’s family on my terms, and I don’t let them push me around. I’m hoping with time I can coach my bf into gaining independence from the women in his family.
You have to decide if you want to deal with all of that drama. There’s a good chance your bf’s mother will continue to butt her way into your relationship. Are you prepared to deal with that? Your bf may not be willing to set boundaries with his mother. I’d talk to him and see how he feels about his mom’s intrusiveness.
I think her calling me breeder got me worried of how she’ll view other people and their kids. I certainly don’t want her talking like that.
I agree that a marriage train-wreck on Christmas is not in the spirit of the holiday. Now you have the evidence, you're at liberty to tell what you like to whoever you please at whenever you judge the opportune time.
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I don’t check her social media i just checked her snap today because a friend told me she still has my number and she has been stalking my insta story for weeks even after i removed her from my followers.
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The sink cost fallacy is never a policy to love your life by
If you’re having doubts and aren’t happy for 8 years straight you never will be
I'm trying. His shifts move so this holiday period most week days we have them. My girls both have appointments but I'm trying to book suitable days – unfortunately his kids are here M-Th then T-F the next two weeks (I also updated my post with clearer detail)
This made me laugh
Let him know how you feel about him opening up.
The amount of relief you will feel can't be understated. When I was younger I remember that feeling of staying with someone because I was afraid of breaking their heart or always being alone. That's a natural feeling but not a valid reason to stay in a relationship that doesn't work.
I was engaged once. Having that broken off ruined me. My partner was married for 10 years before me. You hurt and you heal and every relationship offers the chance to learn more about yourself and what you need in a partnership and in my experience every subsequent relationship is better because of that (generally lol).
Go be you for a couple years…find some fwb that can offer you warmth and freedom but enjoy yourself and grow.
Exactly. Abusive partners wait until they feel like they have you locked down or trapped in the relationship. For example, moving in together or getting married. Then they drop the act and start the abuse. Domestic violence 101.
Well I asked if I could temporarily stay at his whilst I get a new job. We had been together 3 years. Is that so unreasonable?
The thing is…he was a great roommate to his mother. Part of the reason I complain about the cleaning here is because he kept things immaculate at his mother’s home, but when he moved in with me, he doesn’t have the same standard of cleaning. Personally I hate dishes in the sink, Something that he does more often than not with me, but something he never did at his mother’s house. As of literally one week ago, things have been very clean. And I didn’t wanna move in with him because I’ve never lived alone before and I come from a home with abuse so I feel like I finally had my own space and want ready to move in with a partner. My issue is that I’m frustrated with the memory of the past seven months and he’s asking to feel more welcome and I want to know what steps I can take to decrease my anger or frustration in order to make him feel more welcome, And steps that I can take to make him feel welcome.
They’re probably insanely disappointed in you. You said something completely uncalled for at these people’s worst moment in their life. Your parents probably think they raised an absolute trash person.
The only thing you can do is online life better, eventually your parents will see that you’ve changed. The other parents probably will never forgive you.
Send them. She has a right to know
haha have a good one
I hope everything will go well in your marriage. Wish you the best. ❤️
The condom broke on purpose. Run.
I'm sorry WHAT
Ugh why do people do this shit to themselves i swear. DONT HAVE AN OPEN RELATIONSHIP IF YOU HAVE DOUBTS!
How many posts do we see here about this shit every time. About selfish woman/men who treat partners like shit and then want permission to do it some more and partners saying yes.
Then as ALWAYS regret it knowing they didn't want to do it in the first place. There is absolutely nothing wrong with poly relationships but JFC these things have rules and communication none of which your bf cares about because he does NOT care about you OP.
He wants to get his rocks off whenever he wants while you wait at home for him to come back. That's not a relationship. That's you accepting a shitty deal from a shitty man and looking for any way to justify his shitty behavior so you can stay in a shitty relationship.
Walk away. I guarantee if you started sleeping with other men he would call you a hoe and get all butthurt because you want to cheat on him.
This isn't an equal relationship you are the chick at home while he gets to have fun outside.
Do u want to be serious with a guy like this? I bet you if you ever get married and have kids this is the dude banging the next door neighbor in every AITA post about not trusting your husband.
Why do you want to stay wth him? And because i love him isn't an answer. Because love is a two way street and all your bf wants to do is bang everything that walks. Sorry you are saddling with with a POS if you stay with this guy.
I would go so far as to say that twice a week when your child is six months is much more than what the average couple gets during that period.
Your girlfriend is about to go through something extremely painful, sex or any kind of sexual gratification with each other is not on the mind of your girlfriend or the waxer. Because of the nature of this procedure your probably not going to have sex for a day or two after she gets it done anyway.
Now that being said, you can sit down with your girlfriend and explain to her, calmly and without judgment, that you are feeling insecure about her getting a wax and that you would like more information on it, and why you're feeling insecure. If she's had a wax before then she can walk you through the details of exactly what happens, and I'm sure she can give you the ratio of male waxers to female, which I am going to assume are far more likely done by women.
You are very young, and you need to learn that not everything a woman does with her genitals, or her body at all is related to sex,( tattoos, piercings, the girls personal aesthetics, breast exams, gynecological exams, birth, medical issues, Etc) that we don't look at every single guy who does a service for us or to us as a sexual release, or has anything to do with you at all.
We have to have so many strangers put their hands on our bodies and in our bodies for various things throughout our lives that only our insecurities and embarrassments should matter.
And you really should be doing some research about whatever makes you insecure whether it's in regards to your girlfriend or to yourself personally in the various things that are going to crop up in your life
I hear what you're saying but I hear couples go through this all the time and reach a compromise. I just feel this isn't a place for me to negotiate without betraying myself. I'm willing to do other things for him. I cook great food and people love the parties and social events we host. We have lots of friends who he should know will judge him for leaving his wife and family just because there was no love or intimacy in the relationship.
He has a lot to lose here and I'm trying to figure out how he can at least make it work until the kids grow up.
SIGH.
First, don't ask a question that you can't handle the answer to. Think about that and think about what that means for your maturity.
Second, she is with you. She chose you. If she wanted those other guys, or any other guys, she'd not be with you, Yes?
Next. And this is from my own experience:
I've been with a lot of men, and with a lot of men comes a lot of different penises. One was very small. A few were small. Most were average. A few were really big. Two were stupid big – like, 'don't point that thing at me it might go off.'
But you know who I had best sex with? The very best oh-my-god-orgasms I've had before or since? The guy who was about my height (so short for a man), with a smaller than average dick. Sex with him was mind-blowing because he made it mind-blowing.
It's not about any size – penis, breasts, whatever – it's about being attuned to your lover. Being, as Dan Savage says, Good, Game, and Giving.
Pull your head out of your ego. Ask your girl what she wants. Try it and ask for direction. Play. Have fun. Use toys. Concentrate on her pleasure knowing yours will come, if anything because you satisfied her.
You are 30 years old, OP. Not 15.
Good luck.
Someone venting endlessly about how terrible their boyfriend is, how mistreated they are, the lying and cheating and manipulation and controlling behavior etc… but won't leave them. I've had a couple situations like that, us getting along great, she'd come over and hang out for hours, or we'd go out all night having a fun (platonic) time.
But at some point, a lot of our convos started to feel very repetitive. It was the same routine, sometimes would be fun days just as normal friends, then other days it felt like I was part of the problem, enabling her a bit. She would be in a down mood from work and from her love life. Vent about the same problems she's had forever, but not doing anything to fix it. Then we'd talk a long time and her mood improves, we have a good time hanging out. Repeat that process a lot for a long time. Fast forward a couple years, she broke up with him “for good this time”, was much happier overall, then went back to give it another try with him. Starts venting about relationship issues. We stopped talking, I retired from being her amateur therapist, realized how much better it felt not constantly dealing with someone else's emotions and hardships that had no end. I wasn't interested in dating her, but liked her as a friend, but even that had to have its limit.
Maybe you can find the right time to have a direct talk with her about what she is hoping to get out of this situation. If it's just to take an emotional dump and feel better about her crappy relationship while you develop stronger feelings for her, that's an unhealthy dynamic for you to stay in.
am i reading it incorrectly that you did the thing he did, but since you told him and he didn't tell you you're upset? When the both of you were strictly casual in teh first place? And now he's telling you about it to be honest before trying to get going with you?
It just seems a little unfair that he did what you did, and you're mad at him.
Jesus freakin Christ, the fact that somebody actually believes this is so infuriating. Nowadays you cant even get drunk (BOTH EQUALLY DRUNK) as a man and have sex with a girl because there WILL be people like you saying the man sexually assaulted the girl.
Why the fuck is this downvoted lol
Buncha smelly people on Reddit
This is true, I plan to apologize for throwing the drink and starting the fight and I’m sure she will apologize for beating the crap out of me. I’m sure we can move passed it because we’re both mature now and we squashed all the drama with our “fight”. It’s just going to be so hot for me to laugh with her and be myself, I feel like I’m going to keep flashing back to her on top of me punching me and that will make me feel embarrassed.
Your friends are lowkey dumb. In a relationship, you make compromises. If you had repeatedly told him no, and he refused to listen, then yeah, that would be a problem. But you state yourself that you do it, and you are okay with it. That is a healthy compromise. I've done things with the women I have dated that I didn't particularly care for one way or the other, but I knew it made them particularly happy.
And by the way, do they hold this standard going the other way? Like if he was doing something that is meh to him, because you really liked it and kept asking for it, would they say you are throwing red flags? Or is it just because he is a man asking for anal?
Good for you!! This will hurt a little now, but girl, you did yourself a huge favor. There is someone out there who is actually WORTH your time, energy, and love – this guy is NOT
He’s not going to change, I would probably just walk away lol like you have dated him for 3 years and if he doesn’t rise to your expectations he’s always going to be a source of resentment for you. Why would you want to online like that? He obviously sees you as a source of help that will allow him to essentially be enabled into not having to do much. You said you’re planning for the future, well what the fuck is he doing? Seems like he’s just gonna finish school and sit on his ass. I would have left that situation like a year into it if that. I used to be a fixer but people only change if they want to and doesn’t sound like he does that much.
what the fuck
Don’t feel guilty about ending it. She’s the one who gave the “all or nothing” ultimatum. Her child isn’t your responsibility unless you want it to be.
okay? what’s “the feature” lmao
Run OP.
Looks like you didn't get it either
you are the worst kind of friend. somehow it's all about you. it's almost like when you find someone you like more, the crush you had immediately before disappears. get over yourself. ?
If you can’t see the creepy things you’re saying and doing then you should probably take a step back from dating apps.