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Is this how you plan to spend the rest of your life? Always fearing the worst and attempting to control your partner? I would break it off ASAP and work to find someone that is more compatible with you.
Two people in a relationship should communicate! If she or you does something that makes the other uncomfortable or unhappy, then compromise is warranted. Little things like this piled up and not discussed lead to a pile, then a mountain.
Your wife should simply say, honey I would prefer you use such and such can you please use that. Then you know how to proceed from there.
It’s sad and scary how dangerous insecure men are.
Then how should she say “I’d like the same trip”
But you know. You know about the events. Just bring him.
Well start by not text typing. People will understand you better when you spell out the words.