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Room for on-line sex video chat EIlaSmith
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Languages: en
Birth Date: 2004-04-01
Body Type: bodyTypeThin
Ethnicity: ethnicityWhite
Hair color: hairColorBlack
Eyes color: eyeColorBrown
Subculture: subcultureStudent
Date: November 6, 2022
What if she did it tho and wasn’t just a threat ?
You’re more than fwb in his mind…
Your might want to change your username, don’t think it fits
Dude, this relationship has run its course. She doesn't want to be monogamous with you. If you are not comfortable with what she is proposing save yourself the further heartache because it might not get better.
My husband is my best friend also, but this may be a very unhealthy type of relationship for many.
Saying a person who needs connections outside of their relationship is insecure is very odd. I think the idea of needing only a relationship with your spouse and no one else speaks more of insecurity.
People have connections outside of their relationships, its normal.
It really truly doesn't matter. Those who would take offense have reasons for doing so, but those reasons are because they aren't looking for serious.
Now you should be prepared to be questioned on the matter why you wish to move in the manner you do, and you should be willing to stand to account for your motivations. You may face some pointed questions about your past and those questions are also part of determining if you're the right person for him. If you fear rejection then you will not be making the best decisions for yourself or your life. It is a scarcity mindset and it causes all kinds of poor behaviors.
STOP trying to have another baby.
Go to marriage counseling with a sex-positive therapist, and get your intimacy issues figured out.
Under no circumstances should you get pregnant again until your marriage is in a better place. Babies are not marital duct tape. They cannot fix things or hold you together
Become the plushie!
You should tell him if you still have feelings for Juan. It’s not fair to your husband.
Just go ahead and say it if you are really as open as you lead us to believe in the post. Your husband your secret to tell not Juan’s
No im not sure he's in. I haven't felt like he even likes me in a few weeks. Everything I do is wrong, everything I say is stupid. My confidence was wiped out.
Giving ultimatums to your wife regarding her parents can be a lifelong suffering for you, think carefully before you speak words that will haunt you. If you somehow resolve the situation where everyone is happy, you will be your wife’s lifelong hero. Happy Wife, Happy Life.
It just makes him more likely to argue with everybody for no reason lol, he sounds exhausting, ditch him.
It’s a crush. Not like she’s dating him. She’ll probably be jealous but if this is what ends the friendship, I’d say it wasn’t too strong in the first place.
She did not want to swing, her husband kept pestering her about it until she finally gave in. That’s not really consensual is it?
Don’t stay quiet about this. It will only build up and end in a blow out. Your position is very reasonable. Now you need to tell her what that position is. Have you also considered you’re spending too much time in close quarters? Maybe at the end of your “work day” go to the gym.
Thank you!!
You people don’t fucking get it. Typical Reddit.
My husband and I don't combine assets. We aren't on each other's houses, cars, bank accounts, nothing.
We live! in a house that's in his name only. I pay rent and am not responsible for maintenance, repairs, etc.
We are about to move into a home that's entirely in my name. He will pay me rent and not be responsible for maintenance, repairs, etc.
We are a team. Rent is paid no matter where you are and I rather pay toward my husband's assets than someone else's assets.
Different things work for different people and some people like to combine assets and others don't. You'll have to sit down and figure out what works for both of you. I don't believe she should live with you rent free just because her name isn't on the mortgage/deed or vice versa.
Dump her before she dumps you
If she loved you and not just what you do for her, she could never cheat on you. Keep that in mind.
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So what does he actually love about you? Why is he even with you?
This is a you issue. Checking in isn't his style and you are trying to force that on him. My wife and her family are obnoxious about their check in behavior “text me when you leave”, “text me when you get there” “text me on the way”, “text me if you stop”, “text me what you got at the gas station” blah blah blah blah fucking blah.
I am more of the “if something happens, the police will notify you where to claim my body.” Type of person. If he doesn't want to check in, then you really have no expectation that he should. If you guys are ok with a life360 type of app, maybe that could solve it but that can feel intrusive to people as well so don't hold your breath. You need to work on your anxiety about this because he is under no obligation to change. As the saying goes, change what you have control over, and the only thing you have control over is yourself.
And you just fine with the whole situation?
Because he has a company?
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Sounds like u need to calm down and give them space. It’s over
RAINN is a great resource. I understand your confusion, and I hope you are able to understand this a little bit better.
No, my experience says that at the age of 40 people need to learn to stand up when it comes to their loved ones.
He's not a teen. He has to do better when it's needed, not after.
He even went as far as cutting her out of pictures he sent “The Other Woman”. Either she’s a lifelong crush of his or it’s a new romantic interest. No way is this a platonic friend.
Question to the OP
your last sentence asks for advice
you are getting it in flying colours
Now what ?
we are interested in what you are doing ?
Not actually too young to settle down. I was married younger than that and we both travel the world whenever we can, have kids that shit coming with us because we are still fairly young and can look forward to many years after the kids leave for more travel. It may be too young for some, but it's definitely not too young full stop.
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Your gf is burnt out and it's understandable. But to get burnt out so quickly is a red flag for me. What would happen if you both get married and you were to be injured in a life altering event? How long would she be willing to give you care before she left you? Just something to consider because I wouldn't marry someone so quick to give up.
Now with your sister she needs serious medical intervention. She needs to be committed and evaluated. My best friend has schizophrenia as well and it took a long time to get him where he is today. Man I remember when he was living with me he tried to commit suicide multiple times so we called 911 and he was committed for some time. Took years to get him better. Your sister needs treatment asap.
Don't be in a relationship until you've worked through these issues.
My boyfriend and I both had to kick a dog out of bed when we got together so that we could sleep peacefully. I know of a friend who had to train her cat not to scratch at the door (tinfoil is what she used btw) when she got with her now husband. If she isn’t willing to take these steps, I don’t see how you can move forward with the relationship.
The best thing you can do for yourself is to work on your self hatred. As long as you believe these things you think about yourself, there is no room left to love anyone else, because you will be constantly worried about them leaving you.
Start seeing a therapist and work on your self love.
He said he’s telling me he wanna experience different stuff but I don’t wanna do it wit him and it’s not always about keeping me happy. He said “I wanna do shit too and you keeping me from doing that if you not gon do it wit me i don’t wanna do you dirty”
I don't think I follow. You don't like drugs and weed makes you panic. So you think the answer is to use more? Why don't you just never use, if it doesn't make you feel good? Either way I would just talk to a therapist before making any plans. I'm not sure if many would be down for this.
I know that he’s receiving images of a woman who has not consented to it and instead of doing literally anything he’s letting it ride as a grown man of 43 who should have developed a spine and/or a conscience at this point but if you think that’s all fine that’s great for you.
You’re dating now, so I don’t see a problem with doing holidays separately. My problem is that you mention that in marriage you shouldn’t have to sacrifice- so would you keep doing holidays separately then? What if you had kids involved? This is only going to become a bigger issue the longer you are with her. And I suspect it’ll be an issue with most future partners too.
Jesus Christ dude do not put your head in that bear trap. “I think I can help her and her help me” fuck off. Your dick ain’t got the cure for mental health problems and a broken woman should be responsible for fixing you either. Don’t even start this shit. This ain’t a movie where you cure each other and ride off into the sunset. Maybe she had bigger fish to fry then going to the zoo. SMH dude let her be. She got shit to sort out. Frankly if you are chasing someone who you have only known for a short time and ended up committed then I’m thinking that maybe you need some therapy too cause that is whack. You don’t know this person AT ALL. Slow your damn roll and leave her alone.
Why isn't leaving an option? Certainly not marrying him until you figure this out is an option? If not I think you are out of options. You won't figure out a way to get an almost 40 year old man to carry his weight in a relationship. He should know how by now
He sad but don’t wanna leave his current partner too. Ooof. ?
Wow. You finally open up to her and she stabs you in the heart. Not only that, but she makes it about her, and says that you took advantage of her.
Your story is really tragic and I am so sorry you have had to endure so much. I'm also sorry you had to find out your girlfriend is a shitty person in this way.
Please don't apologize to her again, you did nothing wrong here. This is not your issue to “make right”, it's your girlfriend that needs to atone here. You dared to show vulnerability, and she kicked you in the nuts for it. You deserve better.
I'd tell her very calmly and matter-of-factly that you are disappointed in her response to you actually opening up about your tragic life. It has shown how bad of a person she is, and you're not going to voluntarily stay with a partner that can't support you when you talk about the most tragic events of your life. Events you did nothing to cause, and that continue to haunt you to this day.
Then leave her ass. No emotion, no tears, no anything. Don't give her that satisfaction. Switch her off in your mind. Just leave her and move on.
I was here to offer up MY own idea as to why she could be letting her son win, and this is a far better possibility.
It's also possible that she's actually training your son to be good. To become good at something, most people need to see little bits of success. Her definition of “letting him win” and yours must be different things. To you, it's actually letting him win if he wins. To her, she “let's” him win maybe because he has GROWN and has made enough good moves that day to deserve the “win” to keep the excitement going.
Sometimes mega masters at something are terrible teachers to young beginners. Your wife doesn't seem to be the case. That's great for everyone.
OP, you're immature AF regarding this whole topic. Why do you want your child to NOT enjoy this activity with BOTH of his parents?!
I didn’t really receive any advice that’s why
should i be worried ? ahhh YES.
Sounds like now would be a really good time to get sober.
It is not a good marriage if she cheated. If she cheated once she will cheat again. A mistake is forgetting to buy milk. Taking off your clothes and having sex is an definitive action.
I'm a straight man. I also happen to be fairly well off. I do not think that is a helpful statement personally. I feel quite hurt by being lumped in with a group of people based on my skin colour, gender and wealth, when all I'm trying to do is suggest that men need more help.
I don't think it's useful to point at a group of society and say 'their fault'.
Perfectly said ☝
No fr thé édit literally made me LOL. Kinda reminds me of the movie “the human centipede” Lmao
I couldn’t say. Who knows. Maybe one party being somewhat sensitive and the other being somewhat unhinged is a difficult mix to pull off in the long run.
They have a kid together. Pretty sure most people know where their ex lives. If they didn't have a kid together I totally agree. But they have a kid that they will need to be coparenting for the next 18 years. Keeping your address a secret is weird. I'm sure he's hiding something, whether it's a mistress or the fact he's homeless.
I wouldn’t say anything right away. I would pretend to be asleep when he leaves for the next few weeks. If he whispers it again, that’s a pretty good clue.
Very good point, I don’t want to give any more fuel to her. I think that’s likely true as well, she’s posted before about hating people and tolerating her coworkers. She has a superiority complex and always thinks she smarter or more attractive than other people in her past workplaces
her words, which is all we have, is that he expects spotless. her edit clarifies that she usually cleans everyday and its only occasionally that she will let dishes pile up or whatever. also having hair /stuck/ to the floor is different than seeing some hair on the bathroom floor (where you brush your hair and bathe). id have to sweep every single day, probably twice, to prevent ever seeing my husbands hair on the bathroom floor. even for a full-time housewife with no kids, thats a bit much.
I love the second paragraph but the “how pathetic he is, a satellite to your sun” is apt and poetic.
Believe me, we both are on top of her medical issues, I am her #1 advocate to seek medical help. She went to the doc this week to get it checked and was prescribed stuff for the rashes.
Literally.
The point is:
this sounds like a domination game to me.
The person wanting to domineer sets goals for the other person to reach.
Aka: “create spotless home”
Reward: “Being treated lovingly”.
Punishment if not: “love withdrawal.”
The problem in that game is, that the one subjected to it is not the one to chose when the goal has been reached.
It isn't meant to be reached ever.
I call it “the dog and saussage” game. Making a dog jump for a treat but ever holding it higher than the dog may jump.
I feel like your issue here isn’t only about sex.
You tried to reach your girlfriend in a thousand ways, communicating clearly, asking pertinent questions, being considerate and all for her to just talk with you and tell you what on earth is going on, so that you might make an informed decision about your life.
She just won’t talk to you, and just seems to drag her feet and putting sticks through your bicycle wheels.
Life is too short to just keep hitting your head against a wall, op.
Just part ways amicably and find someone who wants to try alongside you.