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Date: February 20, 2023
AmateurPub
Go jerk off, then slap yourself in the face, and realize you are thinking with your penis and considering throwing your life away.
Fair enough question, I honestly was too much of a coward to say it because of how stupid I think it is I really don’t care at this point because it’s something that matters to me. He knew I was insecure about my body and I made it clear before we even started getting serious that I was against how often he consumed corn and that his social medias were nothing but women he chose to friend and follow solely for their looks. I never asked him to stop, I just said that it would be a deal breaker for me and he agreed to change his habits instead of us going our separate ways. This was clearly an addiction because of how often he was consuming this kind of media (like every bit of his free time, literally hours a day) and I honestly didn’t expect it to go away overnight. I was even willing to emotionally support him through it.
What finally broke me was I found out he blew an insane amount of money on OF subs over a span of three years. Not to mention I found a fake Instagram account of his, but there wasn’t anything on it like messages or even liked posts/comments. That’s not even what upsets me the most. It was his constant anxiety of our finances that would cause him to emotionally lash out at me when I never spent money on anything but necessities. I didn’t even buy myself maternity clothes because I thought I shouldn’t spend the money on something that I’d wear for such a short amount of time and I could just wear his. I stopped buying makeup because he told me he preferred when I didn’t wear any, I only bought takeout when he wanted takeout because he’d tell me I’m spending too much money when I said I was too tired to cook. I wasn’t allowed to follow/be friends with men I personally knew on my social medias, none of which were ever remotely inappropriate. He once berated me and blamed me for a scammer taking my photos from Instagram and making a fake account claiming to have an OF. He screamed at me over the phone and told me it was my fault because my account was public and I “looked the kinda girl that would have one” when I would just be thankful to have a shred of confidence all of those hot women have. Half of the time I’m too scared to post a picture of my face on social media, I probably will never have the confidence to make a living from pictures/videos in my lifetime. He told me it’s unreasonable of me to ask him to watch our child for ten minutes while I go for a jog when he just wanted to relax that day.
There’s more I could elaborate on. So to be honest it wasn’t just the OF subs that made me shut down, it was the hypocritical treatment I endured while it was going on.
There could be a lot of reason he wants to keep it low key! I had a flatmate in college and over time, we grokked that her family was actually absurdly wealthy.
She wore normal jeans and shirts etc but I remember during one winter break, her parents had forced her to buy a Prada trenchcoat and she hid it in the closet. She invited a few of us to her parents' house for a long weekend and one of our roommates was freaking out because they had Picassos in the house. Then when we got back to campus, freakout-roommate broadcasted to everyone that this girl had Picassos, which horrified rich-roommate.
Like, it actually doesn't matter why your bf wants to keep it low key. Maybe he wants to make friends who like him based in his personality, not his wealth. People can also get weirdly antagonistic when they find out someone has a lot of money.
But instead of respecting his wishes based on his life experience, you're using his stuff for clout.
Also just another point to mention — I've been lucky enough to travel a lot, and my life could easily look pretty cool on socials if I wanted it to. However, what would that achieve? If I want to tell my friends I went on a trip, I tell them when I see them. What is your intention when posting this stuff? Do you want people to feel jealous? Do you want to make your life look cooler than it is? I find the most actually at-peace people I've met don't need to post a bunch of edited photos for internet points.
Being a cheery individual is not a solution. It's a bandaid at best on a symptom of a disease.
Maybe taking on more hours for the money is not a price she wants to pay. Have you asked her?
You dismissed couples therapy in you initial post, stating the better solution was her pursuing individual therapy. I cannot as a reader assume you did NOT dismiss it when your very words say otherwise: “she's adamant that we need couples therapy to improve communication, but I think she would benefit from individual therapy more so.”
Your own words say straight out that in your opinion she personally needs therapy more that you two need therapy as a couple.
I think your best bet is to go to couple's therapy, and maybe individual for you both. Learn to communicate, be kind to each other, and remind yourselves of why you married in the first place.
Listen – you aren't interested in my thoughts since you are arguing with me. Maybe I don't get it. But maybe, and more importantly, you don't either.
Talk to her, ask her, go to therapy, learn to communicate. Who knows, OP, maybe she doesn't love you anymore. That would be heartbreaking but if so, you two need to face it.
Don’t think you’re gonna change him, he doesn’t care bout your sexual happiness
You guys are not compatible. You shame him for how he likes to kiss, and tell him he should kiss x way…what if the other way is comfy for him and your way is uncomfortable
Then tell us how old your new wife is.
Do both? My bio dad was never in my life but I had many father figures. I danced with my stepdad, my grandpa and my two uncles
Correct her openly and publically, spread word to everyone you meet, introduce them all to your SON, and everyone will see her for who she is. maybe then they wont trust her word anymore (since she likes to lie).