Bf and I were having a conversation about rating his guy friend when all of a sudden he blurted out that I’m a 7. I didn’t ask him to rate me and I didn’t ask because I didn’t want to get hurt by his answer but he voluntarily gave it to me and I didn’t like it. I feel like I’m not pretty enough. I feel like every time I’ll look in the mirror I’m just a 7 to his eyes. It’s so unfair that he had to tell me this.
But am I just overreacting? But I feel so sad and hurt over this. I feel like I’m not enough. Please tell me if I’m just overreacting?
UPDATE: I didn’t think a ton of people would respond to this post but thanks to all the people who responded regardless if it was negative or positive.
I know that what I’m feeling sad about is childish or petty that’s why I’m asking if I’m overreacting. And maybe I am. Maybe I’m not. It’s subjective, I know. I’ll get over myself. Thank you for answering my question.
As for the people who are calling me (and telling me that I deserve it for rating other people as well) or my bf bad people for ‘rating other people’, I know it may sound bad, but have you not had a conversation with someone you’re really close with and you know if other people are around they’re gonna judge? This is one of those convos. My bf and I can talk about anything because we are each other’s safe space. Doesn’t mean we mean what we say or we are bad people. We’re not perfect, yeah, but we’re not bad people. We, even as an individual, think as well that this rating bs is nonsense. We were just chatting. It wasn’t deep. It was just the two of us blurting random stuff.
[(This is the convo we had: We were talking about his friend always traveling to Asia and is now dating someone from Asia. It always gives me the ick when Western guys only go after Asian women and these men, based on my limited experience, are usually not conventionally good looking (I know, very judgey of me, but it's not that serious and deep for me). So I asked him what his friend looks like. He didn't have a photo of him. So I asked him to rate him so I can kinda visualize him if he's the stereotype that I thought in my head. I forget how we got from there to him blurting his rating to me was.)
For the people who was wondering why I’m judgey about the Westerner guys ONLY dating Asian women is the fetishizing of US Asian women. And yes, I’m Asian (I read a comment that Asian women are chill and doesn’t worry about stuff like rating, well, you haven’t dated or know a lot of Asians because you are so wrong). This is a whole different topic so I no longer want to expand on this but if you want to talk more about it I guess message me or something. I’m up for an open discussion.)]
People don’t always say the right thing and I guess this is one of those moments for my bf. If you’re judging our relationship because of my previous post about our relationship, go ahead. It’s fine. You’re human. But the things I post online is not the whole picture of our relationship. I love our relationship most of the time. There are just times that either of us effs up. And that’s fine.
And for the people who are calling me insecure, maybe I am. But my whole worth is not measured by my bf’s rating. It just made me sad that my bf sees me as a “just a seven” (and I know it’s a high rating as some of you would say) when in my mind I should be 10+ for him because I’m his gf but I know that it’s unhealthy for me to police his mind and he is his own person.
Anyway, thank you everyone who participated in this post. Please be nice or be nicer. ?
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