There is a difference between “keeping your partner accountable” and “reading all their chats with friends like a maniac all the time to check if they aren't cheating”.
Yes, trust is blind to an extent, by definition. If you just can't believe in the possibility of your partner being faithful to you without confirming it constantly, then you have deep issues with yourself.
The problem with people who are deeply insecure or hurt from past experience is not only that they want full access to all your private chats etc. but that they will also draw weird conclusions on anything they find. Let's assume OP allows the guy to do what he wants, a week later he'll be making a scene because he finds out she's friends with a girl who cheated on somebody, because in his head that will increase the chances of OP cheating. And so on.
knocking up to lock you in? what are you an object or a human being, you are absolutely instinctively right to want to break up, your gut feeling is spot on!
The main issue is that your husband is an ahole, so it unfortunately makes sense that you're gravitating towards someone who is actually treating you with the compassion and respect you deserve.
I’m fully awake. He’s a great partner besides this which is why I’m asking for advice because this has come out of nowhere.
“Either shut up, or get on board”
And her!
Leave
There is a difference between “keeping your partner accountable” and “reading all their chats with friends like a maniac all the time to check if they aren't cheating”.
Yes, trust is blind to an extent, by definition. If you just can't believe in the possibility of your partner being faithful to you without confirming it constantly, then you have deep issues with yourself.
The problem with people who are deeply insecure or hurt from past experience is not only that they want full access to all your private chats etc. but that they will also draw weird conclusions on anything they find. Let's assume OP allows the guy to do what he wants, a week later he'll be making a scene because he finds out she's friends with a girl who cheated on somebody, because in his head that will increase the chances of OP cheating. And so on.
RUUUUUUUN
knocking up to lock you in? what are you an object or a human being, you are absolutely instinctively right to want to break up, your gut feeling is spot on!
The main issue is that your husband is an ahole, so it unfortunately makes sense that you're gravitating towards someone who is actually treating you with the compassion and respect you deserve.