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Languages: en
Birth Date: 2003-02-23
Body Type: bodyTypeAverage
Ethnicity: ethnicityWhite
Hair color: hairColorBlack
Eyes color: eyeColorBrown
Subculture: subcultureStudent
Date: February 6, 2023
I couldnt sustain that, we all need our own personal time and sometimes both partners time could be better spent, so like you cooking dinner and her going to the shop for some milk while you are doing dinner, its kind of a waste of resources if you get my meaning.
The only thing that I can suggest is that you need to push back on the activities for her to get involved in by herself, I bet she has a non existent social/friend circle as well, both of which will lead to this kind of situation. Get her back out doing a couple of activities a week and she will form friendships there because the group activity everyone there will have a shared interest that they can all relate to
All men do NOT cheat. No man in 3 generations of my family have ever cheated. I've never had a man cheat on me. The kind of man you're with cheats, but not all men.
What a ridiculous thing for him to say.
I didn’t down vote you.
I see nothing really wrong with your handling of the situation OTHER THAN you not stepping away from her totally. But I FULLY understand that issue. I have had it a couple times myself when younger. Hot lessons I had to learn.
This is a situation you walk away from. No messages to her. Nothing. She is saying “come here! No! Go away! Come back! No leave me alone!”
Do you want a life like that? Move on to other women.
You didn’t give enough information about the purchase of the property.
Are you investing in the property? Investing means 1) down payment, 2) your credit is used for the purchase, which would make you both liable for 3) taxes, 4) insurance and 5) maintenance and upkeep.
If you don’t invest in the property then he’s right not to put you on the title. In that case, he would be legally responsible for everything but you would be legally responsible for nothing but your would have equity in the home. In other words, you would have all the benefit and none of the legal responsibility.
With respect to him wanting you to pay, there is nothing wrong with that. You will have to pay rent somewhere. You just don’t get to live for free because he’s your boyfriend.
There is more to homeownership than the mortgage. What you should NOT contribute to is the taxes, insurance, renovations, or maintenance and upkeep. He’ll have equity so he should be solely responsible for that.
And the cleaning the cat litter. Yeah, let’s make your pregnant wife handle cat litter that can be toxic to pregnant women and do heavy lifting. But he did all the hot work and wants even MORE kids even though he can barely help look after the baby he already has.
Maybe is time to do a little snooping
Ok so looks like your girlfriend past is your fault. Go figure
and his wife’s safety should she want to leave.
Thanks I read too fast.
I'd say it has to do with another women, of corse he wouldn't tell you because if it fizzles out during your 'separation' he knows you wouldn't take him back.
Do what he has asked, even though you have to live together treat him like a room mate, don't clean up after him, do his washing, cook for him, and only communicate about your son nothing else, not how his day was or yours yada yada,
Start going out with friends for the night, for meals or for drinks, or to watch a movie, so he can get a sense of what life without you is like.
But I'm saying it's someone else and he wants to sleep with them and see if there any there while keeping you on the hook as a foolout
She sounds like a keeper!
What we all want in a partner is someone where the support and admiration, respect and love is mutual. It's not some weird game where one has to be superior to the other, or where domination and one-up-man-ship rules, etc. That sort of crap belongs in the old days of “happy wife, happy life” and “the little home maker” crap.
Successful marriages are where each person in it revels in the successes of the other and where it is returned. You see you partner doing well and you know that you are a part of that, just as they are a part in your own successes. The same is true for failures but rather than take blame we support, encourage and provide that shoulder to cry on. In both the ups and downs we as partners are there not only for them, but for ourselves. We are a team and that makes for success in any culture, socioeconomic standing or race.
So far from supporting you and being happy that you are finding success, he sees that it's not a partnership for your mutual benefit, but rather as a competition – him against you, your success somehow being to his detriment.
So rather than join you in this success, he feels that he needs to tear you back down to join him at his level. He is so stuck in his 1950's train of thought where he is the one who succeeds with you as his support, that he can't even get his mind around the fact that it can be the other way around.
We'd like to think that our partners can and will grow with us as we progress through life. The normal way is that we support them and that they support us. For you and your husband this is not happening.