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I want us to enjoy together very well, choose one! [Goal Race]
Date: October 4, 2022
AmateurPub
AmateurPub
I want us to enjoy together very well, choose one! [Goal Race]
You can have fun at home. Play! Have fun. Be silly.
Hide notes for each other to find.
Find the worst show on tv and giggle through it.
Cook something together. Can’t cook well? That’s the fun part. Bonus points for watching a cooking show and trying to mimic their recipes with what you have on hand (you won’t, so it gets crazy)
Make something. It doesn’t have to be good. Go on a scavenger hunt through your home as if you are desperate to entertain a three year old. Pick up random items. Build a thing. Think crafty things like glue, popsicle sticks or bamboo skewers, balloons, plastic wrap or aluminum foil.
Be silly. Laugh. Find your inner child and play with your partner just because you can.
Lmaooo
If she's asexual then no. Manipulating your partner by lying instead of just saying that it isn't going to happen shouldn't be considered the normal either
I am just saying this based on what people have told me.
You’ve known this since the beginning. It is her boundary and her beliefs. Either you wait until marriage or you break up. You can’t and shouldn’t try to convince her to change her boundary or belief.
We have our arguments but we’re mostly happy. I mean the not calling me beautiful thing sucks. But is it truly enough to end everything after almost 3 years? Idk. Maybe you’re right, maybe you’re wrong. It makes me feel like ?
Well, the current guy definitely doesn't sound like a catch. He's way too insecure to be in a relationship and I suspect that if you move in with him, he will get either very clingy or very controlling. The issue is mainly that he doesn't want to work on himself and you are already subconsciously taking on the role of thus having to “fix” him yourself (“Maybe living together and me having a job here would give him more security?”). But this guy is not a project for you to tackle. You're already super doubtful – you should listen to your gut.
That said, I think that you should maybe look more into finding a partner which matches your art-hobby instead of your gaming-hobby. You're not wrong for wanting to online in an apartment decorated the way you want it to. However, it seems like your plan is that every room in your home should be “yours”, with a colorful wall and your art there. And unlike you have a partner who's all for colorful walls and your art, this can be very suffocating and make the other person feel like they have no “space” in the home, as every room, in literally bold colors, is claimed by your taste and hobby. I am an artist myself and your vision of your home makes me feel suffocated.
That doesn't mean that it's wrong to want what you want. You definitely don't need a partner who hates the art you make and love. But some men have a “man cave” and you should maybe also think about if you are able to confine your hobby a bit more. Living together means compromise and that means that some rooms – especially shared rooms – must be to the taste of both people. And with art and brightly colored walls, that can be difficult.
Gaming, on the other hand, is far less “intrusive”. You have a console or two or three, maybe a shelf of games, maybe a second computer. But it's not as “dominating” as art in the whole apartment. Because of that, finding someone who resonates more with you when it comes to art might lead to a much nicer living-together than someone who resonates with you in gaming.
But yeah, that's just an extra. The main point is that you should listen to your gut that this current guy isn't what you really want, as red flags are already showing.
If he is not willing to communicate about his possible issues and your views on porn etc then I don’t see how anything is going to change. You sound like this is making you very unhappy and it’s harming your self-esteem. Further it sounds like your needs aren’t being fulfilled. How is it the few times you’re having sex? Is he pleasing you?
This just sounds miserable and you’re way too young to be so unhappy and give up on sex. Have you had those issues before marriage? Or ever talked about your sex drives etc? Honestly, I can’t help but think that’s way to early to get married and problems/incompatibilities are bound to get out of this.
You may have some insecurities too that you could work on, but here that’s not the point and the fault lies with him. For example I think it’s expecting your partner to only find you and really nobody else ever attracted or feel attracted to is in my opinion a bit unhealthy. But yeah, that’s not the point here.
And I guess most men would dream of their wife saying she’s available and ready whenever they want! So sorry that your husband doesn’t appreciate that.
Why don’t you just go for multiple rounds
I see where you're coming from and honestly I'd say pick your battles in most cases but here there might be a compromise, have you ever considered the child's middle name be your last name, that way it's there but they don't have to write it out every time they spell their name? I personally have a very long name so I do think your Gf is being a bit ridiculous on this but I think it's because you aren't married yet and she'll probably split and have you co-parent after the kid is born. That's a whole separate discussion though. I can see why you want your name to be given to the child, it's still your kid and I can understand not wanting anyone to try to make you out as an absent father because of that, but you have to be more resilient in that case as well. In court where it actually matters who is being an absent parent, the two things considered is whose name is on the birth certificate and how much did they contribute to the child's upbringing, and that should be all that matters to you too.