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Sloppy Deepthroat [20 tokens remaining]
Date: October 3, 2022
AmateurPub
AmateurPub
Sloppy Deepthroat [20 tokens remaining]
I was gonna say this, it’s def ADD, I know bc I have it and do this with literally any hobby
You sound like you have a lot to give an offer someone you are in a relationship with and you deserve to have someone who bearings the same to the table. A relationship/family is a team and team effort is the minimum requirement. Think of all the cons of the relationship so that you have the motivation to start a fresh
I never showered with my son primarily because I have a very clear memory at about 2 or 3 of being in the bath with my mother. Still to this day know what my mother looked like nekkid, and it's not cool my friend. I can't imagine how much weirder I would feel if that was my father. Memories begin developing as soon as language does. NTA.
I showered/bathed with both my parents as a young child, and in my opinion it was perfectly normal. However I can fully understand your position and how you could be uncomfortable with that situation. I assume your wife had a similar upbringing to me and that’s why she may not understand your position on the matter.
Thank you
Yeah this all definitely happened
You seem like an immature asshole
Your girl is not even divorced. That’s the first ?do you really need me to point out more?
I appreciate your opinion 🙂
I bet you think strippers really think your hot.
Actually I haven't . I am merely requesting that users challenge their mind on gender role reversal. I'm saying treat it like you don't know their story or opinion. You have built up their entire story in your head
Not sure egy people are downvoting me for asking you a question, but anyway.
It's probably that your sister.has aone deep insecurities about her self worth.
It's also possible she's never experienced a healthy relationship and doesn't know better, or that she has so much has baggage fromnrhe other relationships that she's drawn to abusive people.
I don't think we should be blaming OPs mum for being groomed by a pedo at age 15 tho.
I get that he is your bf, but you are shoving the bf's problem onto his friend because he is easier to blame. The real source of it is that you don't trust your bf who has cheated before and jokes around about cheating. That isn't something you can blame his friend for. That was all your bf's actions and choices. People tend to hang around the same type of people. Maybe it is time to take off those rose tinted glasses and realize your bf is part of that group because he is one of them. And that is his choice and part of who he is. He isn't this idealized version in your head that is being led astray by friends. He made a conscious choice to be like them because that is who he decided to be.
I struggled with a lot of relationship anxiety earlier in my relationship as we are mostly long distance. Worried about things like he’ll meet someone new that he gets to spend more time with or he’ll get bored of me, etc. The best decision I ever made was opening up to him and explaining this anxiety and trying to find where it sourced from. The best piece of advice I can give is that when you feel this way, remember your partner chooses to be with you every day you guys are together. She wakes up every day wanting to be with you because if she didn’t you guys wouldn’t be together. But you are because she wants to be. Try remembering this and try talking to your partner about this anxiety and why you’re feeling this way. Good luck OP.
This is exactly how I imagined Australians writing a story.
You seem insecure about a girl that you’re still only in the talking stage with. I understand that you worry about them “rekindling” or something like that, maybe you’ve had a bad experience with this type of situation but I think TRUST comes before making your partner cut somebody out.
They have on and off messages as friends? Sounds pretty harmless.
They even said they’d end it if it was what they’re partner really needed/wanted. That seems pretty good to me, if anything they shouldn’t have to do that.
I think your concerns and expectations are a bigger red flag.
Trust is key.
I think a bigger red flag is ending every relationship on a bad note and never talking to them again.
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do u really think so
Dude, she set a boundary because she sees your comments as negative and discouraging about her body.
If you choose to ignore or you disagree with her boundary, be prepared for consequences (like her breaking up with you).
As some have mentioned, it sounds like you two may have been compatible at one point, and you guys are no longer compatible (it sounds like she’s comfortable in her own skin or no longer enjoys doing activities like going up the gym.
It’s obviously something important to you, and not so much her. This sounds like the great divide putting a wedge between you two. You can still care about someone, but you cannot force your will onto them.
She doesn’t want to change my dude. Do with that what you will.
Need advice?
Leave her scummy ass
It's long distance so isn't even super serious
She clearly isnt as serious about the relationship as you
And she's clearly not mature enough to handle alcohol and her behaviour when drunk
Leave her man, let her be some other poor sods problem
Dump her first then make a Dr's appointment.
I really like your replies to everyone in this thread OP. You seem to have an open mind unlike most people on this sub-reddit. If you truly put effort to save your relationship, I’m sure you can make it work. I’ll pray everything goes well for you and your wife. Good luck and Merry Christmas!
We have 2 dogs together, I can't afford to move out, I'm terrified of starting over. I have thought about all these things and also the “am I making a big deal? Am I thinking the grass is greener? Is he actually as bad as these moments compared to the larger scale?”
We have intertwined our entire lives together for 8 years now, walking away isn't as easy as just up and leaving if this were a fresh relationship ship. I'm also not some faultless person who is the epitome of a perfect partner. I've done my fair share of awful behaviors and words.
This actually might be a good idea, thanks. I know her therapist so it wouldn't hurt to at least talk to him about it even if he can't address the situation specifically.
Thank you so much for this, I’m hurt and angry but I’ll be okay, it’s good to hear other people’s perspectives on this. When you’re going through it yourself you don’t always seen things clearly.
I would be the same if he came to me saying he was concerned about a male friend. I would do what needed to be done to make things better. It seems he values Lizzie over me and that is tough.
I really appreciate your response.
Yes she is mixed race. I’m born in the Middle East. Dark complexion. My husband is white. Being mixed race wasn’t very good either but I have my sister who’s also married to a white man that suggested we found a more “mixed” school because where we lived was like 100% white. When we moved her to the other school she felt way better.
I want to add that my daughter never was bullied or teased in school. And she always had/still has many friends. It’s when she started understanding the other adults making comments when her resentment started. The first time she asked me why she wasn’t like me I told her that she was beautiful because she was her. She got really upset and started yelling that I was a liar. I knew that I couldn’t do this on my own so I asked professionals for help. She was reluctant in the beginning and hated me more because she thought I believed she was “mentally sick” but it helped her a lot in the long run. Therapy helped me too with how to behave around her. I realized that I was dismissing her feelings by saying that she was beautiful etc but that was all I desperately wanted her to see. Instead the therapist helped me realize that I can’t dismiss her feelings but try to change her views about herself.
I totally agree with you…when I was 18 …I went out on dates…multiple dates with one guy or many guys…anyone and everyone that asked…I enjoyed the attention and the nice places they took me , the nice cars they drove…I didn't think about their feelings…I was just having fun….now that I'm older and not that immature little 18 year old girl I know better not to do that and waste people's time and money….not saying this what the girl is doing…there could be many reasons but maybe not mature enough to state the reasons why.
Stay with her while looking for way to move out. If you are financially forced to stay for many months cause of lease then break up with het, but stay as roomates only. It will be healthier for you.
By all means say sorry to your sister for introducing her, but your intention at the time was to be kind to your friend when she was grieving, and that was a thoroughly decent action.
Maybe her loss made her look for love or validation from an older man where she shouldn't have, but be clear in your own mind that you're not responsible for their choices and actions.
This could be a huge mismatch for you. She doesn't show affection through physical touch. *Most* people need the physical touch of their partner, especially if this is your 'love language'. I would guess from you writing either one or both of you are sexually inexperienced? What are the expectations for 'later'?
How long have you been together now?
This does feel like she's enjoying the boyfriend experience without the intimate, romantic parts. Could she be asexual? You don't want to find out a year from now.
Being physically rejected by someone you care about will grind you down. You can't force her to accept your touching, hugging, cuddling, etc., but can you be with someone long term that is literally holding you at arms-length? So many questions with only one obvious answer.
A big green flag for me when I met the guy I’m dating was that, although we are the same age, he didn’t approach me because he thought I was too young for him (I have a baby face, and it’s not a good thing).
What’s your plan for childcare if she goes to work and can’t take your child with her?
She's consistently abusive; break up.
Sexual assault js a crime. I would suggest you go with her to the police department to file a report. Help her arrange to see a doctor to STD testing. Tell her you want to be supportive but not pushy. Respect she will likely have some rough times ahead. Encourage her to seek therapy.
You are already helping, but recognizing she's been traumatized and asking ways to help her. I wish you both all the best.
Question…how much does he help with your Son? Does he get up at night? Change diapers, or bathe, change him? Does he parent, like take the baby so you can have time to recharge?
Just wondering because if he isn’t doing his fair share, so you have a little time for YOU, how is he entitled to an opinion on anything?
If saving yourself from abuse seems mean then so be it.
I would tell her that if she wasn't willing to have a candid conversation then you will cut her off, if she doesn't, then just avoid her. Stop talking to her unless absolutely neccessary. Block her on everything, the whole nine yards.
You need a health test. Like, tomorrow…sort it out!
And stop using spit…gross. Get lube and use lube.
Also, focus on foreplay so your partner is ready! It doesn't sound like she us ready for penetrative sex.
If he says something like that again, definitely speak with him about it to make sure that things are okay. He may have been having an off night.
But if he unexpectedly says offhand negative things like that more often, talk with him to make sure that he’s not depressed. (And encourage him to see a doctor/mental health professional if he is.)
Thank you for sharing and I'm sorry you were put through a lot! Good insight, I'm definitely someone who prefer to suppress emotion and thoughts I don't want, but this isn't quite so easy so it really is a huge bother. I can't do something scandalous like getting with this guy for many reasons so I'm better off just trying to accept my emotions as part of being human, but not acting on them.
Her passive aggressively asking for big ticket items is annoying as fudge. You complaining about not getting a cooked meal sounds misogynistic. If she wanted a bigger ring she should’ve added some money to the ring pot. I did with my husband, and he still managed to get the wrong ring. ?she does seem ungrateful from the small snippet that you’ve given us. I’d do couples therapy quick before you get married.
This won’t be equal and it is bound to blow up eventually. Just don’t even go there. Plenty ways to have emotional and physical intimacy if you truly value her like you say.
I'm sorry but I ve seen dodgy behaviour from him. When we weren't dating, I saw him walking with her to the station from university. He saw me too and the next day he saw me but didn't say anything to me. Later on I found out that he acted like that because he didn't know how I would react seeing him with her
He is the kind of guy who used to sleep around with women. After we started dating, he stopped but his actions make me feel he wants her and maybe she doesn't but ues insisting by being too nice just to get out of the friendzone.
He is matching clothes with her, constantly going out with her, sharing all his problems with her and even took her to the picnic because he didn't want to get bored or left out since he's not very close friends with the other phd students. She is constantly there in his life which is frightening that some other woman has so much influence in his life.
Were you dropped on your head as a baby or something?
Can second on the bisexual thing. I have absolutely no idea really why I wouldn't want to date a trans person but I just don't. There's absolutely room for my mind to be changed (in a hypothetical situation because I'm in a very happy relationship) but as a general thought it's just not for me for some reason.
I don't think you are being honest with yourself. If they weren't a big deal, you would not have reacted that way. You called her manipulative as if she was planning to nab you while “lying” about wanting kids. Its one thing to be thrown off when your life plan has a wrench thrown in but your reaction was more than that. If they didn't matter to you, why are you hurt? She didn't lie to you. Things change. Maybe she's having second thoughts but hasn't made up her mind. Having a baby is life threatening and scary- its normal even for people who want kids to get apprehensive.
If you really want kids and will resent her for it- you will be doing the same thing you accused her of. You cannot pressure her to have them. That will end poorly for everyone.
I will!
She threatened to harm herself if I didn’t answer her right now.
As you already know, Independent, “Recurrent suicidal behavior, gestures, threats, or self-injurious behavior” is one of the 9 BPD symptoms listed in the American DSM-5.
Your husband more than likely did not give you HPV. You don't mention anything about being a virgin before you married him nor was he, so in reality what happened is you contracted HPV in some way and the HPV increases your risk of cervical cancer.
I'm sorry your husband was a piece of s***, but in all likelihood this is just something that happened. Your age. You were also around the time for the HPV vaccine which makes me a little surprised you didn't get it.
So just to be clear here, he probably didn't give you the virus, the only way to know for sure would be to get you both tested and match the strains of hpv that you both have. So you probably had HPV from a previous partner that wasn't him.
I get the point you’re trying to make but this is a reach. A 25 year old is fully developed and years into adulthood.
Trash this therapist. Do not ever continue with a therapist that dismisses your feelings and takes sides.
I’d also say dump the guy, first and go find a personal therapist to help you get over the betrayal trauma, but I’m trying to give you the advice you asked for.
OP, please, PLEASE look at this objectively. He has strategically cut you off from nearly every conceivable resource that could help you escape this hellhole of a marriage (AND, he has given you 3 children, which I’m almost certain he uses as extra leverage to keep you around: i.e. ‘you would seriously hurt our children by breaking up their home/family??’)
Money is a resource that could help you leave. Yet despite the fact that you work more hours than he does, he makes you deposit your paycheck into his account, and he would ‘blow a blood vessel’ if you stopped doing that.
Friends are a resource that could help/encourage you to leave. Yet he infantilizes the idea of having connections with anyone other than him. This is by design. His intent is to keep you close to/dependent on/influenced ONLY by him.
Self confidence and a strong belief that YOU ARE INHERENTLY WORTHY is a resource that could empower you to leave. Yet he has (for YEARS) beaten you down, picked you apart, and made you feel less-than. He has systematically stripped away your self worth so that you have to turn to HIM for any scraps of validation. And I’d be willing to bet my right arm that those insults are mixed in with the rare but valuable ‘compliments’, so as to pull your mind to the thought of ‘well, sometimes he’s kind and loving, maybe if I just work harder, I’ll get to see this side of him more often’.
You have three children. I have no idea their gender, but it doesn’t matter. In their home, they are learning by EXAMPLE how relationships work. If you have boys, is this what you want then to model themselves after once they become husbands?? If you have girls, is this what you want them to think they have to put up with from their husbands? Regardless of their genders, IS THIS WHAT YOU WANT TO SHOW THEM LOVE IS??
Sweetheart, you and your babies deserve MORE. So much more. There are resources available that can help you break free from him so that y’all can have the more you deserve. Seek them out. Not next week, or next year; not at some ‘milestone’ that you think would be easier for y’all, do it NOW.
Please.
Saw that he is a cop. Honestly just leave it. Those guys kill random kids just for looking at them funny.
If he doesn't leave you alone just tell him that you know he's married and want to be left alone.
If you feel endangered, know that you can contact the precinct captain and report him to internal affairs but I'd leave that option to only if he doesn't leave you alone.
???
Brother is an asshole.
Makes me wonder what hed do to you if you said something he didnt like
YTA for posting this here. Moral judgment requests are against the rules of this subreddit. Go post this on r/AmITheAsshole where it belongs.
Not if you're on Reddit a lot ?
Is there any particular reason that you have two children but no marriage?
I know a guy like this , he gets bored fast and I suspect some personality disorder is in play. The guy I know behaves super romantic in the first months then gets cold as a fridge, I heard him talk on the phone with his ex gf once and the only thing I could think of was “how the F can she stand a guy talking to you like u were some vegetable “
These guys cannot stay alone, they need supplies and a back up in case the main supply is problematic. He already has a 2nd option.
He lost weight, felt sexy in his new self, and wanted to be single to see if he could sleep with the hot girl he was clearly lusting over. He is stringing you along in case he overreacted and realizes he can't actually sleep with anyone he deems hotter than you. He is telling you, without words, that he sees you as the less attractive “safe” backup option. Honestly, screw being nice. Throw the whole man out. You should be with someone who sees YOU as the hottest girl in town, not be wishy washy about his enthusiasm for you.
Something is wrong with this generation FR… why is everyone a fucking cheater