You’re right, he does need to figure this out without my support. &Wow I never thought about it like that but to be honest, he most likely wouldn’t. He would be too devastated to even talk to me let alone carry on a relationship with me.
In a meaningful friendship people should be able to confide mistakes and regrets and secrets and be able to love each other even if they dont always approve of the others actions.
Key word here is regrets. It doesn’t sound like OP’s friend or the friend of this other persons mother regret their actions. It’s not like they said “hey I did this thing and I feel bad about it and I’m going to stop/tell my partner.” It was “I’m doing this thing that I know is bad, but I don’t give a fuck how it affects other people and I’m going to keep doing it anyways.”
Those are very very different scenarios. I’m the first, I’d support my friend and help them navigate the situation. In the second, I’d tell their partner and stop being friends with them because their morals don’t align with mine.
“No. You do not get to tell me you hate me over something I have zero control over and then turn around to say we should stay married. I deserve someone who will love me through sickness and in health. I’ll be sending you the divorce papers shortly.”
It’s up to you and him to decide what’s right and wrong when it comes to intimacy and sexual content in your relationship. For some, having a partner searching up OF models/sex workers/related hashtags is a dealbreaker. If it is for you, you need to have a conversation with him and let him know. Establish boundaries and expectations together. If he breaks them, then that’s an issue. Personally for me, this would be a dealbreaker. But you’ve got to communicate.
He didn't claim to be smarter than me though
You’re right, he does need to figure this out without my support. &Wow I never thought about it like that but to be honest, he most likely wouldn’t. He would be too devastated to even talk to me let alone carry on a relationship with me.
In a meaningful friendship people should be able to confide mistakes and regrets and secrets and be able to love each other even if they dont always approve of the others actions.
Key word here is regrets. It doesn’t sound like OP’s friend or the friend of this other persons mother regret their actions. It’s not like they said “hey I did this thing and I feel bad about it and I’m going to stop/tell my partner.” It was “I’m doing this thing that I know is bad, but I don’t give a fuck how it affects other people and I’m going to keep doing it anyways.”
Those are very very different scenarios. I’m the first, I’d support my friend and help them navigate the situation. In the second, I’d tell their partner and stop being friends with them because their morals don’t align with mine.
“No. You do not get to tell me you hate me over something I have zero control over and then turn around to say we should stay married. I deserve someone who will love me through sickness and in health. I’ll be sending you the divorce papers shortly.”
It’s up to you and him to decide what’s right and wrong when it comes to intimacy and sexual content in your relationship. For some, having a partner searching up OF models/sex workers/related hashtags is a dealbreaker. If it is for you, you need to have a conversation with him and let him know. Establish boundaries and expectations together. If he breaks them, then that’s an issue. Personally for me, this would be a dealbreaker. But you’ve got to communicate.
Don't talk to her ever again