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V A L, 21 y.o.
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Online Live Sex Chat rooms V A L
Date: October 14, 2022
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I told her to stop when she did it the first time. I suppose I wasn’t too stern about it but I made it pretty clear I didn’t appreciate it. I get she doesn’t have malicious intent, but she did it again and just doesn’t seem to get why I don’t like her joking about it. Maybe it’s fragile masculinity, but I’m straight and the way she jokes about it offends me.
There is something tantalizing about the taboo. You don't need to read into it. It lasts about as long as the “session”.
Don't let the possibility of problems become a problem. If something bad happens to your relationship because of his actions, so be it. Better to let that happen than to try and control him.
Never marry someone you wouldn't want to divorce… seems like she will just make things more difficult then they needs to be
This is an emotional affair.
I mean if you’re not ok with it, you’re not ok with it. Don’t be afraid to set boundaries and stick by them. Does she know you’re not ok with it?
I wouldn’t take it personally against yourself. But if it’s something you don’t like, communicate that to her. Tell her that there are times when you’d like to have her full attention and not be distracted by the phone as well. That doesn’t have to be all the time. But it’s reasonable to request some time regularly to connect with each other and only focus on each other.
That said, I’m not one for diagnosing people on the Internet, mainly cause I’m not a licensed clinician nor do I know the person. But it does seem like she could be dealing with something like ADHD and her brain needs to have constant stimuli to stay focused. I have that as well, and I’ll often watch TikToks or browse Reddit while watching movies with friends. I still understand and follow the movie. But my brain can’t be still for too long. So I go to therapy and am on meds to help. Maybe it’s something she could look into.
Either your sister is to the point that she cannot be helped and your husband is being very reasonable,
Or
Your sister is reaching out for help and your husband is being a jerk.
It’s impossible to tell without more information.
Well said!!!
He can look at the menu every where, but he eats at home…
That sounds like something a narcissist would say
That would drive me up the wall not knowing what the boundaries are.
Worst case scenario is he sleeps around trying to “find himself”, you ok with that?
You need to have that conversation. ASAP. Advocate for yourself in what you're ok with in this.
Why? There are so many kinks – the chances you'll find a guy with that specific one?
You're aready assuming they will want that, won't accept your 'no' and leave!!!!
Stop trying to forecast the future and live in the now. If you constantly worry about potential.future what ifs, life will pass you by……
wow just wow, you’re so fucked in the head dude. ofc you tell him, you’re a horrible wife and should’ve never married in the first place.
I’m not stopping him ?
I mean, what changes do you think yall both individually need? Will the growth you speak of impact your opinion on having kids, because you can't and shouldn't bank on his opinion to change? Neither of yall are wrong for wanting different paths in life, and you need to recognize that neither of you will be happy in this relationship while you both crave opposite goals. It can be hot to accept, but sometimes trying to compromise isn't better than letting go. Resentment is bound to follow; someone won't get what they want, and the other will pick up on the resentment. I would think long and hot about what you want and are willing to compromise on, and have a good conversation with your partner, with the possibility of splitting very much on the table.
Just went through his profile he is a crypto bro into cars, he is this delusional
He’s gonna keep hitting you, you’re vulnerable and come from an abusive household. He might not know it yet, but he’s a predator and knew you wouldn’t have a choice but to accept this as your reality now since you on-line there, your parents’ house isn’t an option and you likely display extreme submissiveness due to your upbringing. Get a job then get one more, save up a security deposit and first months rent and gtfo there before he knocks you up
I tried to follow you, but it says failed to follow. Im not sure what im doing wrong. Not a big reddit user?
No offense dude but if you come across to them the same way you do here then she is gonna stay pissed.
i definitely agree on that, i just also feel conflicted due to past and still looming abuse they’ve put me through, even if it was misguided. my little brother ended up being the golden child between he and i, and i was the scapegoat, and i managed not to treat him the way they treated me, so i guess that also adds to the resentment
If you don’t trust him, break up with him. If it’s because he’s not trustworthy, then find someone else who is. If it’s because you’re insecure and he hasn’t done anything that caused you to mistrust him, work on yourself.
I know!
Oh I agree he’s definitely got predator vibes and I truly feel for her too. It would be super disappointing to see your dad fall for someone your age and down right gutting if he chose pussy over his own kid. But what do I know it might be true love on both parts but I’d say this relationship won’t last long. Hopefully when it’s over he’s not done too much harm to his and his daughter’s relationship and they can go from there.
It's not that you're a villain. You do appear to feel competition with your dad's girlfriend. It's that the way you're approaching this is going to lead to nothing good. You're pissed, we get that. But, unfortunately, your dad is asking you to be the adult in the situation when you're the youngest person there.
But, there are going to be many times in your adult life that you have to play nice to someone. It sucks. They suck. But just remember that if you continue with this approach, you're the one whose going to be left out. Which would suck less?
Tell your dad that you love him, you want the very best for him. So you will be nicer to his girlfriend. Then ask them to have a sitdown conversation about their expectations. And ask them to hear you out too. That way your dad is privy to whatever his girlfriend says she wants. This might be the right time to ask about your dad's wishes when his girlfriend asks you to do tasks around the house. You can't be snarky because this won't work if you're throwing eye daggers at her.
Look, this situation sounds terrible but you're using the wrong roadmap. Let's say you've lived in New York your whole life. You know how to navigate and be good at reading the roadmap for New York. But then something shifts and you unwillingly have to move to New Jersey. You don't want to be there so you continue to try to make the New York map work. But it won't work. So get your bearings and start navigating for what IS happening (New Jersey) not what you want to happen (New York). I'm sorry you have to do that. I hope that relationship burns out soon.
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If he has an issue with it, and is making zero effort to overcome it, then you’re simply not compatible. But it’s never valid to make someone feel shitty for their “body count.” It’s ok to have preferences but not to use them to be cruel. If he can’t handle it, he shouldn’t be pursuing you. His insecurity is not valid, he knew what he was getting into and he’s using it to be cruel
Yeah. take your trolling elsewhere you realize we can see you begging for upvotes and laughing about this post in a Chat sub right?
No. If he can stick his dick in it, he can touch it etc. otherwise, if it’s not clean enough for foreplay, it’s definitely not clean enough for his dick.
Well, that's something at least.
Not much, but it's something.
Yeah but why can’t he leave?
My bf is a poor sleeper and if I wake him up and he can’t get back to sleep or only has a few hours left, he will take himself to the guest bedroom.
Do u think it’s possible to be mad at someone for what they did but not want to be with them anymore cuz ur with someone else ?
This is a lot. I think. Maybe you could talk to a therapist or psychologist to help you understand situations like she was in, and how she (and you) might be affected. And how her experience and thought processes might affect your futures. I mean, she more than likely needs psychological help herself, even if she seems to be dealing with life ok.
> I actually have a MS in cancer cell microbiology but heavy US medical bills are the absolute worst
That's another reason why you should leave the USA. And I'm very happy to have left.
No
You could dismiss anyone’s insecurities as childish.
Insecurities are usually irrational.
You also obviously don’t know what the word invalid means in that context or had no problem with directly contradicting your use of it in your next sentence.
You’re literally still invalidating him “for men that have actual problems”.
People have irrational insecurities. I bet you would never tell a woman “you’re insecurity is irrational and it’s not a real problem. I would care if it was an actual problem”.
You would get broken up with instantly. Stop being a macho tough guy that is never offended or shows his feelings. This is Reddit, no one cares how tough you are or how well you can take insults.
People get hurt by the partners all the time, I’m not saying it’s the worst thing in the world but it’s easily avoidable.
You’re still invalidating him right now.
He is allowed to not like your body type but
wants to open up the relationship on his side.
Lots of lol, he is crass. Dump him. You're 22, don't allow a douchecanoe to waste your time.
He also called the baby a “she”, so the fictional baby is a girl. He used the pronouns. ??♀️
I've spoken to a medical professional I trust and she told me people who need help often don't want it, and if I feel that someone needs help I should get it to them even if they're reluctant (and I mean help more in terms of medication than forcing people through talk therapy if they're unwilling). But I see it from your perspective, so would you still say I should stand by?
Stress could harm your unborn child.
Just from a selfish standpoint, because clearly you aren’t capable of much else, do you want to risk the pregnancy just to ask her to get surgery, or to “give you a hall pass”?
If you think that wouldn’t be a distressing conversation for her, to give your reasons as to all of this, then you are delusional.
Same with the surgery, it would be an unnecessary risk to the pregnancy.
Stress can cause a spontaneous abortion. You really want to risk it, over a scar?
Go back to therapy. See another therapist if you like. Don’t put your issues on your wife. Figure out how to be a better person & support her through the pregnancy & birth. It is literally the very least you could do.
If she does something it's because she has psychological issues, not because of you. I don't know if this is the case, but if she's telling you she'll harm herself if you break up, she's being manipulative. Also, you are not qualified to help her. She needs a counselor or therapist.
And it's ultimately unkind to keep her in a relationship that isn't what she thinks it is.
He always tells me how much he loves me, but apparently not enough to prevent financial ruin ?
I would recommend doing things that make you feel good, whatever that may be. Getting a hair cut or having a spa day can be very relaxing.
write the account asking it to be removed. Title the email Cease and Desist. Report the video it usually has an option saying it was yours. Make your sister take her video down or make it private
All submissions must request advice
rule 2. I don't see a request
All submissions must request advice
rule 2. I don't see a request
From reading your replies, I think you'd feel more at home over in the adultery sub.
It's been a year, break the engagement and run from the drama!!
Thanks! I’m used to working on myself and always try to. I’m in recovery for substance abuse so admittance of a character defect is nothing new to me. I guess I really just had no idea that this wasn’t more normal. I thought when all couples fought there’s some yelling involved. I do know I’m a good dad and a good partner but obviously there’s work to do. Sometimes it does feel like I’m the only one in the relationship working on myself but that’s all I can do. I really appreciate you taking the time. This has been enlightening to say the least and I feel much better. If it works out or doesn’t I’ll end up a better man on the other side.
Thanks! I’m used to working on myself and always try to. I’m in recovery for substance abuse so admittance of a character defect is nothing new to me. I guess I really just had no idea that this wasn’t more normal. I thought when all couples fought there’s some yelling involved. I do know I’m a good dad and a good partner but obviously there’s work to do. Sometimes it does feel like I’m the only one in the relationship working on myself but that’s all I can do. I really appreciate you taking the time. This has been enlightening to say the least and I feel much better. If it works out or doesn’t I’ll end up a better man on the other side.
you have said “no”, this is a complete sentence, remind him of the money he was loaned from his brother and ask his brother if his dad paid it back. If they want to sell the house, sell the house but sell it as is.
Tell your husband that he has children to feed, mortgage (rent), and car payments, and those come before his dad otherwise he can go live! with his mom and dad giving them his entire paycheck while you fight for child support.
A colleague? That’s super weird – no business will think it’s a good idea.
A super close friend to an expensive city with 2 beds? Sure I’ve done it (after being married for 10 years).
!remindme 3 days
IMO, this sounds like long-distance relationships aren’t for you.
Not if you suspect he's a cheater, which he is.
“Full grown 17 year old” lol. How old are you? No 17 year old is fully grown, mature or somehow vastly more worldly than a 15 year old.
It's the intention that matters: is it a terrible thing to do to fuck with your sisters relationship? Yes, absolutely. That's not what happened though.
It's not terrible to warn your sister, with proof, that her boyfriend is a disloyal and shitty boyfriend that will literally message any woman on earth who follows him on social media.
I feel like you're just put out because you can imagine someone catfishing you like this. Here's the thing; it wouldn't have mattered at all if the bf didn't message the account.
Don't be shady and people won't be shady around you
We’ve known each other for about 3 years now, and we spend a significant amount of time on foreplay before getting intimate. The main issue here is that his erection always goes down within seconds.
Yeah it's his house, but we live together.
I had an ex with a porn addiction, that masterbated every single day and sometimes multiple times a day all throughout high school. By the time he was 21, he had erectile dysfunction and little to no sensation in his penis.
I’ve joined groups I’ve met with people, I’m not really sure why I struggle so much socially or why most people don’t seem to really want to befriend me, I’m a full time student now but I’ve interacted with old coworkers and I’ve tried messaging other students who also are doing school remotely. I guess I could try to just spend less time with him or ask less of his, but I feel as his romantic partner he should want to spend more time with me than that of his friends, especially when he’s gone so much working,
I still love her too death, there is just no affection. I drink to numb the pain, I know the kids see it. I try to control myself as much as possible.
He was probably tired of being second or third in your life. Now he's free to put himself first and date others.
I don’t know why you’re getting downvoted. Anyone going through a breakup would feel exactly what you’re feeling. It’s weird to spend so much time with someone getting close to them and getting to know them and then having the emotional whiplash of them just turning it off and not caring about you whatsoever anymore. It really makes you wonder if the time you had together even meant anything to them. But you can take solace in the fact that whatever he’s going through that’s causing him to act so callously is his own journey, and I would feel fortunate to not have to be apart of it anymore. That old dumb Dr. Seuss quote had a lot of truth to it: “The people who mind don’t matter, and the people who matter don’t mind.” Focus on the people who do care about you in life or go out and find people who aren’t going to drop you out of nowhere like this. And don’t feel bad about feeling bad, your emotions are totally valid in this.
What would he do then? Just have her watch you two while you fuck?
Just like the lead epidemic, where lead was in everything and is actually still ongoing albeit not as bad. I'm convinced we'll eventually learn current generations have something similar going on. Maybe it's the plastic.
If anyone isn't familiar with lead poisoning. The consequences are one or two more kids in each classroom with symptoms of attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, 10 or 15 more kids in each school in special education programs, and fewer kids who are truly gifted. A five-point reduction in average IQ caused by widespread exposure to lead will result in a 50% increase in the number of children with IQ scores below 70 and a 50% decrease in the number with IQs higher than 130. In adults, lead exposure results in cardiovascular and kidney problems. And some studies have shown that children exposed to lead are at increased risk for school failure, unemployment, and incarceration.
Your wife wants to go on a vacation with a guy who’s in love with her? Do you honestly think nothing will happen between them if she goes? To even entertain the idea of going is WTFFFFF. If she goes I seriously would question what marriage means to her.
Ask her how she would feel if you went with a female coworker on a vacation.