“I got her to agree to staying with me and not moving out”
“Honestly looking back I just wanted to hurt Amy”
I I I me me me blah blah blah. You don’t love Amy, you just wanted the ego stroke of dating a barely legal girl as an almost 30 year old man. Seriously, why do males do this? I’m 29 and I see any guy under like 25 as BOYS.
He doesn't want more than friendship so what more is there to be said? If you can't accept just being friends then you should tell him that and then move on.
It’s unfortunate that you felt the need to explain yourself here.
I hate when I see statements about the child being more important than anyone else in the equation. Or what the child “deserves”. The only thing that is owed to anyone (including a child) is assuring that they are safe and respectful/polite interaction. No one should be expected to leave their partner or forego their own happiness just because they do not adore their partners child.
If you and your partner are okay with the dynamics revolving around his children, then that’s your business. The same way my partner and I understand each other in regards to his child.
The children have two parents. Dating one parent doesn’t mandate you to be a step parent. Sometimes dating and marriage are solely for the purpose of finding a life partner. Not finding another parent-figure for your child. There is nothing wrong with that dynamic.
I hate that on Reddit and in life in general, the consensus seems to be that everyone has to drop everything and change their whole life for the sake of a child. A child should never be mistreated. But again, as long as the child is respected and treated kindly….. you don’t have to adore your partners children to stay in the relationship.
I am really tired of people pushing that things MUST be a certain way because that’s the way THEY feel.
I had my first at 23 (pregnant at 22) and my second at 24, I think it really depends on the person in question. Some people aren't ready at that age, and that is completely ok, but some people are. If OP isn't ready, that's fine, but don't throw your personal opinion on age into it. It comes off a bit patronising. I'm fully pro choice, and OP should do what feels right for her and her circumstances, but OP is also an adult and I'm sure fully aware of what a life changing decision a child is.
2) wtf about adding in the dude when that was the secret plan all along, that’s a huge issue, in addition to the main one, lying again to sneak a dude in
3) you can watch stuff together but you’ll have to keep an eye on her for a long time, not trustworthy
If you mean well and want to invite him in a friendly non flirtatious way then why not? To be honest it sounds really interesting isn't that something you can go by yourself to? I'm really interested in perfumes so I know it's a really niche hobby it's hot to find other people who are that into it. Hell I'd go with you
The judge will force the assets split fairly. The same with child custody. OP may very well be faced with paying child-support if he earns more than she does. In no way will the wife be bankrupt over this. She will be made financially whole.
I get the feeling Fred was looking for a reason to break up.
“I got her to leave her girlfriend”
“I got her to agree to staying with me and not moving out”
“Honestly looking back I just wanted to hurt Amy”
I I I me me me blah blah blah. You don’t love Amy, you just wanted the ego stroke of dating a barely legal girl as an almost 30 year old man. Seriously, why do males do this? I’m 29 and I see any guy under like 25 as BOYS.
Sounds like a Jerk…give him more of exactly what he wants by leaving him completely
He doesn't want more than friendship so what more is there to be said? If you can't accept just being friends then you should tell him that and then move on.
It’s unfortunate that you felt the need to explain yourself here.
I hate when I see statements about the child being more important than anyone else in the equation. Or what the child “deserves”. The only thing that is owed to anyone (including a child) is assuring that they are safe and respectful/polite interaction. No one should be expected to leave their partner or forego their own happiness just because they do not adore their partners child.
If you and your partner are okay with the dynamics revolving around his children, then that’s your business. The same way my partner and I understand each other in regards to his child.
The children have two parents. Dating one parent doesn’t mandate you to be a step parent. Sometimes dating and marriage are solely for the purpose of finding a life partner. Not finding another parent-figure for your child. There is nothing wrong with that dynamic.
I hate that on Reddit and in life in general, the consensus seems to be that everyone has to drop everything and change their whole life for the sake of a child. A child should never be mistreated. But again, as long as the child is respected and treated kindly….. you don’t have to adore your partners children to stay in the relationship.
I am really tired of people pushing that things MUST be a certain way because that’s the way THEY feel.
Seriously though what are the symptoms of a mental breakdown??
I had my first at 23 (pregnant at 22) and my second at 24, I think it really depends on the person in question. Some people aren't ready at that age, and that is completely ok, but some people are. If OP isn't ready, that's fine, but don't throw your personal opinion on age into it. It comes off a bit patronising. I'm fully pro choice, and OP should do what feels right for her and her circumstances, but OP is also an adult and I'm sure fully aware of what a life changing decision a child is.
1) don’t go comfort her, don’t fall for it
2) wtf about adding in the dude when that was the secret plan all along, that’s a huge issue, in addition to the main one, lying again to sneak a dude in
3) you can watch stuff together but you’ll have to keep an eye on her for a long time, not trustworthy
If you mean well and want to invite him in a friendly non flirtatious way then why not? To be honest it sounds really interesting isn't that something you can go by yourself to? I'm really interested in perfumes so I know it's a really niche hobby it's hot to find other people who are that into it. Hell I'd go with you
The judge will force the assets split fairly. The same with child custody. OP may very well be faced with paying child-support if he earns more than she does. In no way will the wife be bankrupt over this. She will be made financially whole.