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Date: October 8, 2022
Sorry man. It sucks but I admire your mindset. You admit to being upset but you're not letting it take over and know you have to keep going forward. I hope you're able to put this behind you as quickly and painlessly as possible. I wish you the best of luck and the most brutal of divorce lawyers
Talk to someone at Aging and Disability Resource Center or Adult Protective Services about the process. I have to say, it's not clear that you really should have guardianship. The well publicized case of Brittany Spears vs. her father demonstrates that it can be extremely hot to get out of guardianship status once you're in it, and this might actually not serve your brother's best interests. If he can't manage money, you might make a case for protective payee or guardian of his finances (but not his person), however if he is maintaining 30 hrs a week employment I think he's doing prety good.
Your comments about affordable housing are elitist and prejudiced. There are plenty of housing situations where he would not be “at the mercy of criminals and junkies.” He should look into buildings reserved for elderly and disabled persons. These are not typically junkies and drug-dealers.
The best thing you can do with your autistic brother is assist him in living independently and learning the skills to be successful at it.
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Doing a fwb when you want a relationship is generally a terrible idea. She made it clear she doesn't want that and it's just going to hurt you to not have what you want.
So 5 years down the line, after you leave this girlfriend for the girl you’re cheating on her with, will you cheat on the new girl for a better fit?
Or more likely, a girl who would help you cheat on your girlfriend is likely to cheat on you just as much as you are on her.
You’re setting yourself up for a very hot, sad life.
He’s being so mean and awful. Why would you want to be with someone that delights in your pain?
Good! You are with your forever person. Do not risk it.
I mean it's very clearly obvious that you shouldn't apologize but the fact that you think you should is telling.
Simply put your options are to either continue living like that and taking care of the dog yourself because that is what is going to happen or put your foot down which is what you did and yet you're trying to pick it back up. My brother if she's too depressed just to take the dog out to use the bathroom she's telling you she thinks it's your responsibility so I think you should come to terms with that fact
There has got to be a place in between letting yourself get beaten up and blacking while beating the shit out of someone. I can’t blame the gf for being scared of him.
Agreed I want to give her the benefit of the doubt and genuinely do hope she finds happiness but I think the issue lies not only in the cultural difference but also in OPs general self awareness.
Yeah. You’re right. It just sucks when there are a 109 things I love about this man and really only ONE thing that continues to hurt me, again and again… I just wish I didn’t care about it. But I do and it definitely feels like a problem
Google it.
I’m trying. My ideas are that it could be something else or that a friend just wiped their lip balm off with tissue. It’s very subtle on the tissue. I thought maybe it could be blood but blood usually dries darker not lighter. He did cut his finger like today or yesterday he said in a razor
I think it would be best for all of us that you do not procreate.
Ear plugs are a thing
I agree! I’m just hurt because he caused so much damage (a lot I’m still working on) and I find it so selfish that he doesn’t even want to speak now that he’s fine. It shows no awareness of what he’s done or how traumatic it was.
This is such a high school/college type of situation.
It's messy.
This girl who he hooked up with, is now in a relationship with his best friend. And his best friend is going away so this a party to celebrate one last time. That's the story, right?
If you're going to get yourself involved into these sticky situations, you need to accept everything in full… this is one of them.
Your BF is with you. This girl is with his best friend. Are you saying that your BF can never be in the same room in as his best friends girl?
Think about it.
If he fucked his best friends girl… what does that do?
Ruins his releationship with you Ruins his friendship with his friend
If you're going to play high school, deal with all the other shit.
End it. My wife did this to me after we'd been married for several years except she got the baby bug, spread it to me, and then within the year had actively stop having sex with me.
When I called her on it she admitted that she changed her mind about kids, didn't want to have to tell me, so started avoiding having sex just to make sure she didn't get pregnant.
So, all our future plans don't mean fuck to me anymore and the last 3.5yrs have been miserable. I wake up and go to work, I drink when I can, and am basically waiting to die. I used to want to live a long time and enjoy retirement together and raise our kids, being better parents than either of us had (low bar), and making sure there was someone around to take care of her when I'm gone (I'm a few years older than her). But there's no point to anything. It's a cold house we've built.
Don't put yourself anywhere near going through something like this.
Is he picking fights every month just to verbally abuse you?? He sounds incredibly toxic.
I misunderstood because I read he was peaking your interest. Think for one moment, how absurd it is that he’s trying to get your attention from his friend. Not only is it a betrayal of the friendship if you were ever caught, but it’s kind of downright despicable. So he’s not a good person anyway. At least not around this issue.
Just mentioning that he talks about her a lot might be the only way to start. Something simple and non judgmental: you talk about her a lot. Is this just that we are more established in our relationship, or has something happened that makes you think of this?
If he’s working through some issues he may need to process what happened. Would he be willing to journal about his past relationships or talk to a therapist?
cbt is something I have to discuss with my doc.
toys might help. Like you said, it is a relationship including 2 individuals. and even if I am not in the mood I can help my partner.
thx
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