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Dirtyts4u Public Chat Channel
Date: October 6, 2022
AmateurPub
AmateurPub
Dirtyts4u Public Chat Channel
You have issues putting into words what is wrong in the exact moment it is happening. This is normal for many people. Some people are over the top out there with all emotions blasting in everyone’s faces at all times, and everyone around them knows exactly what is good or bad at all times.
You seem more reserved, but I’m not sure that should “irritate you both”. Your style is more subdued, less in your face than perhaps he wants it to be but he’s been with you for years probably because you’re such a timid sweetheart because of your earlier experiences. But then he chooses to not like it at other times.
I’m glad you’re in therapy, that should be helping. As a random redditor on the internet I do have advice. It is to be more in your face to everyone, all the time. If you want to work on a part of your personality you need to practice it to get brain pathways going and hardwire it. You may never be a loud, in your face emotional person and that’s ok. But you can flex the muscles you do have to develop expression when you need it.
If your fiancée pisses you off for example, you may not know it right away because you’ve been taught your emotions are invalid and pointless. You may only realize it 4 days later. Well even if it’s over something small or ridiculous, and you realize it 4 days later… tell him! If he is surprised or mocks you for it, remind him you are learning to access your feelings and he can help by acknowledging them. If he still mocks you or says you’re irritating, when you are telling him what is wrong (remember the whole point of this post is he doesn’t know what’s wrong) then he could want the current situation forever and I’m not sure you should marry. He acts like he wants to know what’s wrong but if you tell him something legitimately wrong he blames you or others or says you are overreacting that is not a healthy relationship either. Pay attention to his reactions when you express yourself!
Not just your bf either. With your parents, friends, practice saying feelings and how you view a situation. Even if it feels weird or forced. Tell strangers in the grocery store how happy you are to have found the cereal you like. Tell people waiting in line with you that you are in a hurry and are disappointed that the line isn’t moving. Tell your mom you never really liked that one holiday tradition. Even if it annoys people or serves no purpose, it is helping you get comfortable expressing yourself and being ok with whatever peoples reactions are.
You GF is not trying to sabotage you. It's normal that she wants to go on dates with you.
You two have priorities that just aren't compatible. You want to focus on your work and studies and she wants to have a normal romantic relationship with dates and spending time together.
You two should find time to sit down and just talk about what choices you have considering your future since you two aren't really compatible
Is he always this unpleasant? You sleep apart out of consideration for him. And when caught out for something less than ideal on his phone, he goes on the attack? Oh, honey 🙁 Who knows what his motivation is here, but blame shifting and getting all up on his high horse about your wrongs and flaws sounds like he wants to be the victim, you to be at fault. It's either immature as eff or manipulative as eff, and neither is good.
Are you sure it was him?
How do you think he discovered what pains in the ass they are?
/s
George didn't reach out to apologise for you – he reached out to make himself feel better. Cut the abusive loser off at the knees.
ALLLL OF THIS, OP.
The choice is simple:
Choose your wife or choose your “friend”.
Your choice will tell you where you really stand.