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Room for live sex video chat IAmScoopcake
Model from: de
Languages: en,de
Birth Date: 1995-03-14
Body Type: bodyTypeThin
Ethnicity: ethnicityWhite
Hair color: hairColorBlonde
Eyes color: eyeColorHazel
Subculture: subcultureGamers
Date: October 4, 2022
Yes – he still holds up that we have grown apart and really need to come back together. I have a lot to work on too.
I would get therapy. You deserve support too, man. You've been through so much
Just don’t do something you are not 100% comfortable doing. Not worth it. In your post, you told her no kissing and she disagreed, if she gets her way, you will be doing much more than just kissing.
I just don't see the issue with doing the most caring thing you could do if this is only happening once a month.
Just plan something fun to do for the afternoon. Go see a movie, have some drinks, see friends, etc.
You're right that you're compromising, but this feels like a pointless battle.
“No.”
I’m pretty positive, it says he’s located in the city he just moved to, which is an hour and a half away from me
He's a hobosexual. You let him move in quickly into the relationship and he's going to tell you what you want to hear. Have you actually seen him looking for work and an apartment?
You have so many things that you need to get over before this relationship can be recovered. So in no particular order you have the following to consider.
She is trickle truthing you and the chances that she is still not being honest with you are high. The simplest way to put it is the time honored axiom that “kids kiss, adults fuck”. Unless she can be completely honest with you – even knowing that it may hurt you to know the truth – any trust you have in her will be non-existent.
She has leapt straight into DARVO (Deny, attack, reverse Victim and Offender). This is sadly a classic cheaters move and you can see this quite clearly in trying to pin the blame for her actions on you. Sorry but you didn't magically hand her a card saying “please cheat on me, I'm a bad fiance”. She did this of her own accord, for her own reasons and because even though she knew it was wrong, she did it anyway. None of this is on you.
Even when the chips are down and your engagement is in the balance, she chose him over you and continues to choose him over you. At a time when you would expect that she would pull out all stops to be with you, she has decided – for whatever reason – to continue seeing him. Anyone in her position who feared the loss of their partner would be bending over backwards to show you that she is not who you think she is. Sadly, she has done the exact opposite and is doing all in her power to drive you further apart.
She doesn't want you to “throw away 7 years of a relationship away like this” but isn't that exactly what she is doing by her actions? What did she expect would happen if she hooks up with a guy she has just met at the expense of the person she is supposed to marry? Sorry but no, she has thrown away 7 years, not you, her.
Her lack of honesty to your face is now being backed up by a complete lack of respect for you. How someone can go from “yes I will marry you” to “nah, you never made me happy and this new guy I just met can” is not the way to build a life of joy and happiness on. Hell, if it was a house any right minded civil engineer would condemn the building before the foundations had a chance to dry. The foundations of this relationship are now in the realm of a sand pit in a swamp.
The sum result of her blaming you has you now questioning your role in her affair. This is by design and is something that all cheaters do when faced with the consequences of their actions. She wants you to blame yourself so that you can play her game of “pick me”. Now that you no longer wish to play she'll easily move onto the new guy and will not give you a second thought. For now.
As you say, you have taken action and have cancelled the wedding and stopped your engagement. You are handling this properly and you need to make it clear to her that once the sole thing keeping you together is dealt with – the sale/transfer of the house, that she will be out of your life forever.
So are you throwing away 7 years? No, you had it thrown away for you and you are just sweeping up the mess left behind by her actions.
For now, keep all communication between you restricted purely to the asset split. Tell her absolutely nothing about your plans, what you are doing in your life, etc. She lost that right when she did what she did.
But please also understand that there are no “root causes” for why she did what she did. That is all on her, on her own personal flaws in her character and morals and you had absolutely nothing to do with it. As you said yourself, she is very sneaky and this is just who she is.
So get your agreement done asap and even if you take a small loss and end up with a few months of eating ramen to pay her out, you will end up ahead.
And then once it's all done, start working towards being as indifferent to her as you possibly can be.