So I took my girlfriends like I had permission to drive it near the school not anywhere outside the area of that makes sense but I got caught and her mom eventually forgave me and all seemed to be good.
Honestly it’s ridiculous OP. Unless she has a high risk pregnancy and is on bed rest. Nothing you have said in your OP makes me think that is the case.
So you have a decision to make. Put your foot down and insist she get a job until the baby is born. Or just let it be if you intend to have her stay home with the baby when it’s born. Or tell her you are no longer together, have her move out and coparent the baby when it is born.
Medication really helps too if you’re not adverse to that. I’m on a mood stabilizer (Lamotrogine) and take a benzodiazepine (Clonazepam) for my panic attacks and it’s helped me tremendously. Not to say that I didn’t have trials and errors with medicine but it really helps.
No offense to anyone who is against medication or does holistic medicine. This is just what helps for me.
No honey. You are incredibly dense. He only blocked her because the girlfriend made him do it. After he told her months after it started happening. Probably to get a reaction from her. And he didn’t want to block her. He regretted it and was so glad when she started talking to him again after they went back to work. He is literally posting this to talk about leaving his girlfriend because of her. Wake the hell up. Read what the guy is SAYING instead of what you wish he was saying. Good lord.
Your post was removed for the following reason(s):
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I think you might have a drinking problem. I also think that you really need to talk about this marriage divorce thing. Clearly, it’s an issue between the two of you. Her remark was a little passive aggressive, and yours was to get angry with her because she, you know she’s right and it’s an issue. So if you clean up your stuff, it might help both of you.
His family is toxic. And I think his excuse that “you don’t know how families work because…. “ is bullshit. He is too attached to mommy and daddy. And perhaps there is a level of mental intimidation there. Meaning , I don’t get my way I am going to blow up etc etc. And as a child growing up in that environment you learn to obey and appease. Maybe I am wrong? Idk. Point I am trying to make is that unless he sets ground rules and barriers with his parents, this ain’t going to work.
Spending time a part is a good thing but it means nothing unless he straightens his parents out. Clearly , they don’t like you and they don’t have any compassion towards you. And now that a baby is involved it complicates things more.
And if you have no support system, it becomes you against them and you are 11 hours away from your family.
Couples counseling is probably the right call, but your boyfriend needs individual counseling or a swift kick in the ass.
To reunite with him, you need to make sure he has put them on a short leash. And I am not sure he will do that. Their promises are empty based on what you have written. And I could see them exploding again because they don’t seem to know how operate with people outside their environment.
Did you cum inside her? If not there is a minimal chance… alas precum is said to have the potential to create life. Best not to have unprotected sex unless you’re ready for the responsibility of having a baby.
He said he does 40. In his own estimation. That means it's probably closer to 20 because if he's out of the house all day working and spends time with his child in the evenings (which is of course great!) then when would he do all these chores?
I would like to know what the wife does when he comes home from work. Does she get to relax while he has the child or does she use that time to do all “her” chores which she had absolutely no time for during the day?
I suspect it's the latter, but I'd me more than happy to be convinced otherwise.
Just want to give you some respect for your maturity. I was nowhere near as mature at your age, or 10 years later for that matter.
Thank you for acknowledging her feelings, your feelings, both ‘readiness’, and how impactful abortion* can be. I respect your approach to care for both of your feelings. I recommend you talk to your doc as a trusted source on birth control, often trusting one source is easier than looking at a poll of random people.
*I’m pro choice with awareness of impact.
P.S. I do offer a sarcastic and dirty answer, but respectfully only offer if you ask for it thru DM.
That is not a healthy mindset. You need to heal between relationships. The trope about getting over one guy by getting under another isn’t really the way.
At some point, if it's becoming a more committed relationship, she should tell him. Sex work is a deal breaker for some people and he has a right to choose if that's something he wants to have in the record of his life.
That said, this is just another thing that says, the best path forward is to reveal nothing and end the relationship.
Don't date people you work with. It's never worth the drama, especially if you have secrets that could really harm your life, like a history of sex work.
Guaranteed, someone definitely got a video or some other to the new company. He must’ve been bragging too. So the ex-job knew who to send the evidence to.
Plus, the photo she posted clearly was showing too much cleavage.
It’s not be being insecure or controlling
“Too much cleavage” IS a controlling statement. You don't get to decode what's “too much cleavage” for her to show.
IT ISN'T YOUR CLEAVAGE.
Also, I k ow what criticism is, junior. Her telling you what matches best or goes together is MUCH different from you telling her she can't show off too much decolletage.
My wife respects the fuck out kf our relationship, but do you think she cares if I were to say she shows too much cleavage?
Controlling a partner isn't respecting them or your relationship.
Ya I feel like most people are missing a glaring issue that you pointed out. Her life just got completely upended without her say. She has a right to feel a certain type of way about it.
Maybe i will piggyback but i’m going to skip the part where it makes me uncomfortable… because i would feel like that would completely close the door to him opening up about it. And it’s not that i’m uncomfortable at all, it’s more of a is he using on himself or someone else type of worry… if that makes sense. If he enjoys that kink i’m completely okay with it and honestly wouldn’t mind opening the door to pleasuring him more. i just want him to be honest with me.
can’t imagine he’s aromantic if he’s willingly in a relationship and calls me his girlfriend
So I took my girlfriends like I had permission to drive it near the school not anywhere outside the area of that makes sense but I got caught and her mom eventually forgave me and all seemed to be good.
Just talk about your feelings and learn to love yourself
Honestly it’s ridiculous OP. Unless she has a high risk pregnancy and is on bed rest. Nothing you have said in your OP makes me think that is the case.
So you have a decision to make. Put your foot down and insist she get a job until the baby is born. Or just let it be if you intend to have her stay home with the baby when it’s born. Or tell her you are no longer together, have her move out and coparent the baby when it is born.
Medication really helps too if you’re not adverse to that. I’m on a mood stabilizer (Lamotrogine) and take a benzodiazepine (Clonazepam) for my panic attacks and it’s helped me tremendously. Not to say that I didn’t have trials and errors with medicine but it really helps.
No offense to anyone who is against medication or does holistic medicine. This is just what helps for me.
No honey. You are incredibly dense. He only blocked her because the girlfriend made him do it. After he told her months after it started happening. Probably to get a reaction from her. And he didn’t want to block her. He regretted it and was so glad when she started talking to him again after they went back to work. He is literally posting this to talk about leaving his girlfriend because of her. Wake the hell up. Read what the guy is SAYING instead of what you wish he was saying. Good lord.
You like him and he likes you. You have both matured and fixed a few flaws. Go have fun!
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Also it's not your job to “educate or rehabilitate” a 30yo man. That's his responsibility to seek out a professional for help.
Seems like the bitter asshole is you here.
I think you might have a drinking problem. I also think that you really need to talk about this marriage divorce thing. Clearly, it’s an issue between the two of you. Her remark was a little passive aggressive, and yours was to get angry with her because she, you know she’s right and it’s an issue. So if you clean up your stuff, it might help both of you.
Lots to unpack here…
His family is toxic. And I think his excuse that “you don’t know how families work because…. “ is bullshit. He is too attached to mommy and daddy. And perhaps there is a level of mental intimidation there. Meaning , I don’t get my way I am going to blow up etc etc. And as a child growing up in that environment you learn to obey and appease. Maybe I am wrong? Idk. Point I am trying to make is that unless he sets ground rules and barriers with his parents, this ain’t going to work.
Spending time a part is a good thing but it means nothing unless he straightens his parents out. Clearly , they don’t like you and they don’t have any compassion towards you. And now that a baby is involved it complicates things more.
And if you have no support system, it becomes you against them and you are 11 hours away from your family.
Couples counseling is probably the right call, but your boyfriend needs individual counseling or a swift kick in the ass.
To reunite with him, you need to make sure he has put them on a short leash. And I am not sure he will do that. Their promises are empty based on what you have written. And I could see them exploding again because they don’t seem to know how operate with people outside their environment.
Unless you are living at home with your mother, I don't really see why her input matters at 28 years old. You've been an adult for a decade. Own it.
Did you cum inside her? If not there is a minimal chance… alas precum is said to have the potential to create life. Best not to have unprotected sex unless you’re ready for the responsibility of having a baby.
He said he does 40. In his own estimation. That means it's probably closer to 20 because if he's out of the house all day working and spends time with his child in the evenings (which is of course great!) then when would he do all these chores?
I would like to know what the wife does when he comes home from work. Does she get to relax while he has the child or does she use that time to do all “her” chores which she had absolutely no time for during the day?
I suspect it's the latter, but I'd me more than happy to be convinced otherwise.
Just want to give you some respect for your maturity. I was nowhere near as mature at your age, or 10 years later for that matter.
Thank you for acknowledging her feelings, your feelings, both ‘readiness’, and how impactful abortion* can be. I respect your approach to care for both of your feelings. I recommend you talk to your doc as a trusted source on birth control, often trusting one source is easier than looking at a poll of random people.
*I’m pro choice with awareness of impact.
P.S. I do offer a sarcastic and dirty answer, but respectfully only offer if you ask for it thru DM.
Why are you in a relationship without sex?
That is not a healthy mindset. You need to heal between relationships. The trope about getting over one guy by getting under another isn’t really the way.
Say no.
At some point, if it's becoming a more committed relationship, she should tell him. Sex work is a deal breaker for some people and he has a right to choose if that's something he wants to have in the record of his life.
That said, this is just another thing that says, the best path forward is to reveal nothing and end the relationship.
Don't date people you work with. It's never worth the drama, especially if you have secrets that could really harm your life, like a history of sex work.
Why have I read this exact story before somewhere else?
Guaranteed, someone definitely got a video or some other to the new company. He must’ve been bragging too. So the ex-job knew who to send the evidence to.
Plus, the photo she posted clearly was showing too much cleavage.
It’s not be being insecure or controlling
“Too much cleavage” IS a controlling statement. You don't get to decode what's “too much cleavage” for her to show.
IT ISN'T YOUR CLEAVAGE.
Also, I k ow what criticism is, junior. Her telling you what matches best or goes together is MUCH different from you telling her she can't show off too much decolletage.
My wife respects the fuck out kf our relationship, but do you think she cares if I were to say she shows too much cleavage?
Controlling a partner isn't respecting them or your relationship.
Facts
Ya I feel like most people are missing a glaring issue that you pointed out. Her life just got completely upended without her say. She has a right to feel a certain type of way about it.
Maybe i will piggyback but i’m going to skip the part where it makes me uncomfortable… because i would feel like that would completely close the door to him opening up about it. And it’s not that i’m uncomfortable at all, it’s more of a is he using on himself or someone else type of worry… if that makes sense. If he enjoys that kink i’m completely okay with it and honestly wouldn’t mind opening the door to pleasuring him more. i just want him to be honest with me.