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1. New friendships and relationships are interesting and exciting, they’re a chance to be somebody new or to explore new hobbies and activities. Sometimes people just get absorbed for a while because they like who they get to be. They detach from old friendships as they’re too busy or they just don’t feel the same way about them as they used to.

   If Lucy had a new romantic partner, would you be a little more understanding of her spending a lot of time with a new person? Romantic partners don’t replace friendships but new friends do, which is why you feel threatened. It hurts when you feel you aren’t your best friend’s best friend, it’s eye-opening and lonely.

   Maybe write her a text, an email or a letter, just explaining how you feel without mentioning Kate. Make it about the two of you without being accusatory. Tell her that you’re both growing up and growing apart but that you miss how close you used to be and that you’d like to make plans to meet up in 2023, be it meeting in the middle somehow or you visiting one another. Then the ball is in her court.

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2. This man is leaving bruises on you from actions that he knows bother you. This enough should be enough for you to leave. And I think that you know this deep inside, which is why you don’t want to mention this to your family and friends because you know if they came to you with this issue, that’s the advice you would give them. Sometimes it’s harder to be kinder and protective to ourselves than others.

   If you feel you need to have the conversation with him or give him a chance then if he has any reaction other than immediate genuine remorse and absolutely being ok with zero play fighting ever again then leave. And even if he initially does but repeats the behaviour – please leave.

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3. Well apparently the girl was sober so…

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