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lift up skirt and shake your ass [164 tokens remaining]
Date: November 18, 2022
AmateurPub
AmateurPub
lift up skirt and shake your ass [164 tokens remaining]
I wouldn’t be in a relationship with this person.
I appreciate that, I’ve finally got the strength to leave and I’m going to follow through
he's a jerk. this isn't going to stop, it's only going to get worse
“I afforded him the same opportunity.”
You sound incredibly controlling. I’m not sure how you’ve made it this far in your relationship.
how long have yo been dating him?
Tell him exactly what you said in this post and tell him if he wants a mature relationship he needs to be mature. Act like a man or you'll walk.
Hey there. I didn't see any replies yet, but I can help a little. In my experience with a long term relationship with a doctor around your bfs age, this is normal, and may improve once he gets settled into the routine for a few more years. Think about a regular job that requires you to help people, and how much that can take out of anyone on a daily basis, then dial that stress level up to a potential max 10, and realize your boyfriend has not been an actual doctor for very long by industry standards, so every minute he's working is crucial to his future career. They write down everything – performance reviews, how much of a controlled substance being prescribed, EVERYTHING, and it can be overwhelming. He needs to be on time, reliable, up to date on medical changes, and still refer to 8-10 years of info he learned in school. All that can be a ton of pressure and it's insidious because they have to uphold patient privacy too. That means, he has to prove himself to be competent and credible, and when on call, he can probably rarely speak freely. It's also common for doctors to have so many unexpected patients in a day they don't have time and shouldn't be texting for even a few minutes. He has to make decisions about people's lives that could potentially heal them or hurt them, he's using a lot of fast critical thinking skills and managing tons of data, and there's no one else to fall back on for support if he fails. Its no excuse for him to be completely MIA towards you, but he probably has to face some harrowing decisions all on his own whenever he is working, and so he's compartmentalizing his work life to avoid it stressing him out for no reason. He's becoming doctor version of himself while at work, and can't really break that to text chat about everyday life when in that mindset (also imo a bit harders for men who don't often talk as much about their stress anyways). He has to be emotionally invested in his patients, yet remain reserved enough to make objective decisions about their care going forward, and this can lead to a kind of empathetic burnout. My bf went through this exactly and could go a whole week without a decent conversation when he was in his first few years. It was super hot and had I been in a different life scenario myself, i don't know how we would have made it work. Add in that he will have coworkers who expect a high commitment, high level of intelligence, have a bunch of your customers family members constantly needing reassurance, and that he is responsible for other people's health and lives every day, even if he has his own stresses, that can be daunting and make anyone withdrawal from everyday things to just find some peace and quiet. Make it so he can just zone out and relax the second he's off the clock and explain to him that you may be dating him but that relationships, like communication, are two way streets. I'm not saying this behavior should continue unchecked or indefinitely, but empathetic burnout is very real and this sounds like something he is trying to avoid, or maybe something he doesn't have a good grasp on avoiding so he's shutting off completely. Give him some slack, and don't think others doctors partners aren't dealing with the exact same things. It's almost a second job. Ive had conversations with a few of the men dating women who are doctors and one of the major sacrifices we all make is doing our own thing, having our own struggles to solve independently, while our partners are at work, because a person can only have the patience and energy for so much before shutting down. I also hope this helps comfort you that this sounds exactly like the struggles I was having around your age. Do yourself a favor and forge your own hobbies and interests. Maybe even play a little hard to get, don't be so available to him every day, and see what happens. My bf didn't realize how much work it was to keep up on our relationship until I stopped doing ALL of the communication, all of the housework, etc., and I did all that without thanks because he deserves a safe uncomplicated space to unwind. Your bf does too, and so do you, so try to create that safety without needing to be reassured so much, and see if he starts opening up more. It can be gradual, but just see if there is any progress once you do that because if he cares he will eventually start to settle into his field and come back around.