Sorry for the difficult time you're having. It really hurts to argue with someone you live with.
I'm (63M) going to give you a slightly different viewpoint than others. Probably the same end result. But from a different angle.
I read your headline, and the first paragraph and thought, okay here is another situation where alcohol makes people (usually men) behave badly. Your boyfriend is too old to be drinking out with others (without you), getting drunk, and acting stupid.
People's inhibitions are lower and they say many things. Many things are said that he can't take back. Because it's what he really thinks. You should take note of that. It can't be excused because he was drunk. Neither can him sexually force himself on you.
I want to say good for you, he deserved to be smacked. But, we live! in crazy times and that can get turned around on you. Probably not a good idea if you can avoid it. He could become enraged and really hurt you. You could even get arrested (not that I think you should).
My thought is that if it's gotten physical, and he habitually comes home drunk, this is just not going to end well. You need to end it before it gets way out of hand. I wouldn't give any second chances. Not even put together a complicated plan. Done that, and a year later I haven't moved forward. You need to provide for your temporary physical and financial security and end it. It might mean you need to leave and evict him. It is what it is, you need to work within the law.
If you own the home, change the locks or rekey at a hardware store. Don't take chances. Go to court and get a restraining order. You don't need an attorney.
Finally, you need to reflect on past relationships. I'm not blaming you the victim. But, people sometimes get caught up in getting involved with the same type of toxic people. Where did you meet the current boyfriend? Clubbing or at a bar?
I would think about changing the way you meet people. Volunteer someplace. You could volunteer on a Saturday at PetSmart helping with pet adoptions. You can meet a lot of people that way.
So, good luck. Need any clarification feel free to respond. Be safe!
“I have been trying to convince her that I am not making her cry, its just that she doesn't handle stress very well” – don't do that!
Try couple therapy and go from there!
Start separating finances and get therapy for you and your daughter
Look into finding a new place and don’t tell him any of your moves
Also look for a lawyer
Sorry for the difficult time you're having. It really hurts to argue with someone you live with.
I'm (63M) going to give you a slightly different viewpoint than others. Probably the same end result. But from a different angle.
I read your headline, and the first paragraph and thought, okay here is another situation where alcohol makes people (usually men) behave badly. Your boyfriend is too old to be drinking out with others (without you), getting drunk, and acting stupid.
People's inhibitions are lower and they say many things. Many things are said that he can't take back. Because it's what he really thinks. You should take note of that. It can't be excused because he was drunk. Neither can him sexually force himself on you.
I want to say good for you, he deserved to be smacked. But, we live! in crazy times and that can get turned around on you. Probably not a good idea if you can avoid it. He could become enraged and really hurt you. You could even get arrested (not that I think you should).
My thought is that if it's gotten physical, and he habitually comes home drunk, this is just not going to end well. You need to end it before it gets way out of hand. I wouldn't give any second chances. Not even put together a complicated plan. Done that, and a year later I haven't moved forward. You need to provide for your temporary physical and financial security and end it. It might mean you need to leave and evict him. It is what it is, you need to work within the law.
If you own the home, change the locks or rekey at a hardware store. Don't take chances. Go to court and get a restraining order. You don't need an attorney.
Finally, you need to reflect on past relationships. I'm not blaming you the victim. But, people sometimes get caught up in getting involved with the same type of toxic people. Where did you meet the current boyfriend? Clubbing or at a bar?
I would think about changing the way you meet people. Volunteer someplace. You could volunteer on a Saturday at PetSmart helping with pet adoptions. You can meet a lot of people that way.
So, good luck. Need any clarification feel free to respond. Be safe!